Any Single Sisters-to-be out there?

Hi.



I am 36, divorced, and scheduled for a TAH on 10-Nov (next Wednesday am!). Is there anyone else out there that has done this without a significant other to help? It seems like each post I read there are DHs alongside them. I'm not jealous, really, just wondering how singles and/or single parents got through this?

I'm starting to feel extremely guilty for the time my mother ( a God send) is about to spend taking care of my boys and me!

Thanks for any suggestions.
Tamra

Hi, tlynlewis. I'm a single mom of two boys (13 and 15) and am 7 days post-op. I'm very independent, so it takes a lot for me to ask for help. But, trust me...you should ask for help!!! I have found through my friends that they feel very good about helping. My mom passed away in June from ovarian cancer, so it was hard to go through this without her. But I'm getting there! My sons have been fantastic through this also!! You need to take care of YOU, so grab ahold of your mom and enjoy the time you'll have together!!


Take care!
Tammra

Oh boy, do I ever empathize! I am 47 and single, with no older children to help, either. Never married, in fact.

Fortunately, my sister in Boston offered to come and help for a few days. She has a 9-year-old, so couldn't stay for long. She arrived at noon on a Wednesday - the day I was discharged - and left on a Sunday afternoon. My brother from Minneapolis arrived that same Sunday and left the following Thursday. So, I had onsite help for about a week after coming home from the hospital.

I probably could've done okay without my brother, but the extra few days of someone cooking for me and running errands was still welcome. It would've been really tough those first few days home without my sister there.

Once my brother left, I was on my own. I did fine. For the next few days, friends and neighbors stopped by and helped with taking garbage out and dropping off a few groceries or meals. But by 2 and 1/2 weeks post-op, I was driving and taking care of myself.

I was fortunate that I had a good recovery - no complications. But, if you have onsite help for at least a week and then friends who can help here and there for the next week or two, you may do just as well as I did.

Good luck!

Hi
I'm in the same situation--single, no partner, no children, never been married, etc. I'm wondering how I will get through this on my own. I am not even sure I can line someone up to take care of me the first couple of days I'll be home from the hospital--my kind friends who invited me to stay with them (before they knew the date of my surgery, which is Dec. 14) realized they'll be away till late on the 17th.
I have to say I was glad to see your post because I was beginning to get the idea that everyone else on the list had a husband and/or children and/or parents to help them. My mom died of ovarian cancer in '95, my father will be admitted to a nursing home this coming Tuesday (plenty of stress there--and he's 1000 miles away), and my two cats haven't learned the finer points of human care (though I love to have them around).

I'm eager to hear more advice and experience from other singles out there.

kirinphoebe