Is this normal?

Hello everyone. I am Perceptionist, a 29 year old lady with one child which I delivered 2 months early after being in preterm labor since month 5 of my 7 month pregnancy. That was eight years ago. Prior to me having my daughter I was diagnosed with Endometriosis Phase II w/ adhesions. A few years ago I ran out of options for birth control after being diagnosed with a Pituitary Micro Adenoma. I was sick! Anyway, my Endo seems to have returned causing daily pelvic discomfort and irregular bleeding for months now. I went to the GYN last week and I was told my options;

1. Birth Control for the rest of my years till menopause.
2. Laperscopy to address the Endo.
3. Hysterectomy.

With option 1, it could antagonize the pituitary.
Option 2, I had suck a terrible tubal is 2004, due to scar tissue from my c-section, I would have to have this surgery ever other year.

Option 3, I can't even come to terms with. I have the willies, my skin feels like it is crawling and my breathing is messed up. I get panic attacks, cry in fear of surgery and much more. I have had MANY surgeries but never an organ removed!! I am soo scared I don't even know if I can do it. My body just typing this is like nails on a chalkboard. I can't even have my pants touching my stomach or I get sick. My gag reflex is on high and I think I can't handle my situation. This can't be how it is for me... Help.....?



I can't even read materials or I get sick or feel faint...

Is this normal?

Sounds like anxiety is in full swing, Perceptionist. And very understandably so. I recall always thinking I would leave this world with all my original body parts, tonsils included, until things happened outside of my control. I think what you are feeling is understandably normal. You might want to consider seeing someone (counselor or spiritual advisor) regarding this situation and see if they might have some suggestions as to how to proceed. Even a good doctor might be quite helpful. I know I was very blessed with a PCP (who referred me to the surgeon/specialist) who gave me his direct line number and his home phone to call if I had any thing I needed to talk about.

Hang in there and take it slow and one step at a time. This site is wonderful and the women on here are outstanding supports. I could not have done it without them.Keep us posted and let us be that listening shoulder.

It is scary Perceptionist, and it is normal to have fear. We all went through it to some degree, so you are not alone! I like to almost pass out in the Doctor's office when they explain a procedure or show me graphic pictures. They have to lie me down, and get me water to drink, and I slowly regain color! Those nurses move fast when you do that!
Now, my hysterectomy is over with, and I am two weeks plus some post-op - this is the best thing that I have ever done! It was hard to come to the decision, and hard to wait for the surgery once it was set. You need to decide if it is right for you, and this site will help with plenty of information! I recall mourning my uterus a week before the surgery, and another Sister said something that made me feel a little better - why keep a diseased organ that is only giving you grief! (It was longer than that, but that is the condensed version!) During this whole process I was depressed (went on anti-depressants), and started seeing a counselor. That helped A LOT! What helped the most was this site though - I think that I even had a pre-op post labeled "PANIC!!!" when I thought I was ready to run instead of have the surgery. So, we all go through it, and we are here for you! Let me know if you have any further questions or concerns!

Gretchen

I think you need to decide what is best for you. Research all of your options and consider each of them carefully and discuss this with you Dr. If you decide that a hysterectomy is what you need to do for you, then you are in the right place. We all have fears of this surgery. I had panic and anxiety attacks and I was just so scarred. You must first trust in your decision and trust in your DR. and I promise it is not as bad as what your mind makes it. And if you need us we are here for you , to help you, to calm you and to make you feel secure in your choice. I wish the best...Keep us informed on how you are doing....

Thank You soo much everyone. I am soo scared I can't get the anxienty in order. Just thinking about another teriable surgery is enough to talk the blood out of my head!! I will be here, TRYING to read materials and looking for support. Were your families "on-board" or was there some differences in opinions? My family is pushing for me to have it done. My support is little so again all Thanks for listening.

My family was quite supportive. I was blessed in that regard. 5 weeks out and my daughters are still quite supportive and my husband too but he is sometimes forgetting I can't do as much as I want to do. But all in all, they are all supportive and on board with my recovery. I think they are all looking forward to the time I will again have more energy and feel normal again (whatever normal is

My family also pushed me into having it done. But it was a good decision. The anxiety is what is the worst. I never had to be put to sleep before so this was my first time and I was a basket case. But I did it and I feel good about my decision.. I am sure whatever decision you make will be the right one for you...

The anxiety you're experiencing is normal. I think we are all experiencing it to some degree.

I for one can totally relate. I have a history of severe panic attacks (where I lose consciousness) that go way back. I'm doing pretty well (no panic so far) in spite of my fears. However, I bought a book on hysterectomy, tried to read it, and could not. The text and graphics sent me into "fight or flight" mode. Picking the book up and leafing through it made me feel like I wanted to jump out of my skin. I put the book aside realizing I can't handle it right now. Part of coping with anxiety is learning your limits and honoring those limits. Nurture your psyche in the same way you would nurture your garden, and watch it grow

I think its important to keep the dialog open when you're experiencing anxiety. Expressing your feelings and getting support from others can help to take the edge off the anxiety. Connecting with a counselor can also be helpful. I've learned alot about my own anxiety through therapy and the tools I carry with me now have had a positive impact on my anxiety levels.

One of my therapists taught me to create positive distractions to help me manage my anxiety and get through difficult situations. I don't know if these techniques would work for you but I'll share them in case you want to try them. The techniques I'm using now to get through my surgery involves creating healthy distractions, preparing myself, and setting meaningful goals. When I was facing the news of my own hysterectomy (and this can be applied to your exploring your options), I learned about hysterectomy in small doses. When I tried to take in too much I found myself in sensory overload (anxiety, fear, depression). I broke up the daily learning with daily activities that distracted me and enhanced my sense of wellness. Now that the surgery date is set for me, I'm setting goals for myself (things that I can look forward to) after the surgery. The goals (rewards) are helping to counter the onset of "fear or flight" (get through this and I get to do that). If I didn't do these things for myself, my anxiety would peak and I would probably . I'm still anxious but it's manageable. I wish I could make the anxiety go completely away but probably not this time .

I'm sorry you're experiencing so much anxiety. I know what it's like to be in anxiety overload. I hope you'll post back here as you explore your options.

-- Laura

	Quote:
Originally Posted by Zone_V Now that the surgery date is set for me, I'm setting goals for myself (things that I can look forward to) after the surgery. The goals (rewards) are helping to counter the onset of "fear or flight" (get through this and I get to do that). If I didn't do these things for myself, my anxiety would peak and I would probably . -- Laura

Laura,

I completely understand! I actually bribed myself with the cutest red shoes. The deal I made with myself was that I could have the shoes if I went through with having my surgery. They are my "badge" of courage for having my hsyterectomy!

Gretchen

Gretchen,
Red shoes? How fabulous! Heals or flats and do they click when you walk? It's amazing how a little incentive can push us to git 'er done . I'm bribing myself with a camping and trip. -- Laura