Need to vent... Don't know what to do

I look great and I can start doing more. My husband was in the room, so now he is especting more out of me. The Dr. said that I still can't lift or stretch over my head to get something more then 5 lbs. until 6 weeks, but I can now drive whenever I get off the narcotics for pain. So now, my husband is bugging me about getting of the meds. I told the Dr. about all the emotional upheaval that I am having and she said that I can treat anyone that I want like I want to unless of course they are vaccuming my floors. I am only 9 days post-op. I thought all the Drs. were on the same wavelength when it comes to the recovery time. My appointment was at 11 am, we got home after Christmas shopping at 6 pm and then I had to cook dinner, do the dishes and pack my husband's lunch, while he wrapped Christmas gifts. I am fuming!! He don't want me to get it in my head that I have to lay around for 2 weeks. What am I to do now that the Dr. has cleared me within his hearing?

Nancy

When my doc gave me those instructions & I specifically asked about "what is more"...he said "more walking, more folding clothes someone else washes, dries & brings to you". I specifically asked about driving the tractor, cooking, cleaning, going on searches & got a big NO... except on the searches--after 6 weeks and only on foot. (He has no idea how long some are or the terrain we cross.) Maybe the doc just wasn't clear and graphic--some aren't. That doesn't mean they're giving you the ok to be . I was going stir crazy, DH was WAY over protective (I thought) but I did get some great info from the doc and from hyster-sisters too.
Best of luck,
Kate

I'm sorry it turned out that way.

I do what I can, because it drives me nuts to sit still. I've paid for it too. That is probably why my husband doesn't push me. Well, he has asked be to make him a latte a couple of times when he was sitting on his bum. He was amazingly understanding when I told him I just wasn't up to it. The more recent time I did it. It is kinda fun to be able to give him a little offering of help when he is doing so much for me.

39 Daisies

I'm so sad for everyone dealing with all the family and emotional issues during the aftermath.

It's hard enough for us to put all our energy into healing. It's not fair we have to deal with the family and their tantrums.

I just keep reminding Hubby that when it's HIS turn, well, he won't want NURSE RATCHET!! hehehehe

I remind Daughter that this is just payback for 13 years of having it all done for her. She's not having such a problem with it. Though last night, she gave me some lip about going to get something in the kitchen for me, because deciding what to wear to school today was just SO much more important!

Just go in your room and close your door. There aren't many options we have right now, ya know? Unless we can go stay with someone close by well, this is it. But we don't have to put ourselves directly in the line of fire! Avoidance, at all costs!! For now anyway, til you get your strength back.

Cararay, I was just reading your comments and had to LOL. I thought in this world they'd be only one DH like mine. My DH had a pity party or a hissy fit. Guess when reality sinks in they can't handle it like us. I'm laughing with you...heeheehee.

I took my husband to the pelvicfloor.com and showed him the pictures of the surgery that I had. He seems a lot more understanding now. He couldn't believe how they just pulled the cervix down and cut it off. Thanks for the suggestions. I truly am appreciative. I will be looking for more imput though.

Lovingwife,
I'm so sorry your appt didn't go well :comfort, I'm kinda shocked with your . I am glad to see your DH is responding to visuals, that might be the key. You will probably pay for all you did & be right back in , hope not. While DH is at work you might want to look on the web & this site for more info to share with him. I'm really happy to hear he is comming around

's
Lori

We had our first fight 1 week post-op. I got home on Sun. DH was very considerate and helpful. Mon morn he was just going to go to work for an hour and be home before I woke up. Well, it was noon before he came home and I'd been up since 9 and had been waiting for him (he was on his way) for breakfast. He got home and started cooking. I love that my man can cook but he is a bit anal and must wash each dish as he dirties it so it takes him forever to fix something. Needless to say, it was 1pm before I ate that day. Next day, he gave me a pain pill in the morning so that I would sleep and I did, not waking until 11ish but he still didn't get home until after noon. Then he doesn't think about what he's going to cook for dinner and stuff is all frozen still. Wed was a repeat, not coming home from work until 11:30 ~ all this time promising me he would be home to care for me. He was called in to work in the afternoon and didn't come home until after 6. I was famished. I didn't have DS fix anything because ~ he was on his way home. It was after 8 before dinner was ready. I had been running a fever all day and couldn't find the thermometer because they had cleaned and I just had had it. I snapped at him about it being so late and he just started yelling at me, telling me how ungrateful and unappreciative I'd been. I told him I couldn't wait hours and hours between eating, I wasn't eating usual amounts yet. He said I should have DS fix me things. I said that would be fine but you keep telling me your on your way and I didn't think it would be that long. I just finally quit talking and just started crying. Well, then he started making fun of me for crying, saying Boo Hoo Hoo, etc. I was so hurt and so mad. I didn't talk to him for quite awhile. Then he's all apologetic and doesn't understand why I don't instantly forgive him. I kept running the fever the next day and he took me to the ER Thurs night because I was in such pain and lo and behold, I had a urinary tract infection. I know he felt like a heel but I still can't believe how he went off on me and made fun of me crying. He's got a lot going on at work but he wanted me to do this now so he'd be here for me. I wanted to wait until Jan and just have my mom come stay with me. He is deploying back to Iraq right after Christmas ~ just a little more added stress. At other times, I can't walk across the room without him following right behind, just in case. I just don't get it. He didn't even make any pretenses this week about coming home during the day. DS is in high school and comes home at lunch every day to check on me and see if I need help with anything. I can't wait til next week when DD comes home from college for the holidays.

Teresa
TVH

TRH to you!

Tell DH to stop by the store to pick you up some convenience foods (such as individual Banquet TV dinners, bologna & bread for sandwiches, etc). When you start feeling up to getting around more, you still won't want to be up on your feet as long as you're used to. Convenience foods - on a temporary basis - are a GREAT life saver in situations like this!

Definitely take advantage of the fact DS is coming home for lunch! He's there for a reason, right? If you need something, have him get it. When DS comes in for lunch, have him grab you a TV dinner out of the freezer and toss in the microwave for you or have him fix you a sandwich. It may not be the best solution, but at least you'll be eating and not starving!

When DD comes in, have her take over the rest of the chores. I know she may be expecting to visit with friends and not do all of the work about the house while you're down and out, but she can still pitch in.

You only get one chance to heal. Take it.... don't let anyone bully you otherwise.

Wonderful! LilRed
I was searching for something I could throw all the way to Germany with precision accuracy and thunk DH in the back of the head. (just kidding)
Hang in there!
Teresa & other recovering Princesses