Baby ultrasound pics insensitive????

I just wanted to get an opinion from outsiders looking in. I had my total hyster on Nov 30th. Everyone in my family pretty much knew that although I am only 30 and have only one child I considered myself lucky and was resigned to having only one child. Coincidentally I know 6 women who are pregnant!!! Now I had my days of being depressed about not being able to have anymore children even though I already made a decision not to have any more. My sister-in-law who I don't really get along with because she is the kind of person who always has to one up everyone is pregnant. She has been emailing me her pics of the ultrasound. Do you girls think that that is insensitive???? I know the type of person she is so I think she may be doing this on purpose!!! Do I have the right to get upset??? She knew I hadn't planned to have anymore kids. I just can't help thinking she is doing this on purpose to kind of say "nah nah " look what I have!!! am I crazy??? I don't want anymore but it bothers me to see these ultrasound pics, why??? sorry this is so long just wanted to explain everything.

I think that is TOTALLY insensitive. I had my TVH in Sept. and I'm 31 and I would be upset too. It's always upsetting, even though I didn't want any more either, to see that kind of stuff. I still get upset at the OBGYN when I see pregnant women. She or anyone would know that that would be a sore spot so I don't think your crazy at all. I think she is rubbing it in and being hateful. I would not let her know that it bothers you because then she is getting her way. Keep your head up and remember "This too shall pass".
Lots of love,
Tara

HI Amberlynn,
Perhaps since you said that she knows that "you had made the decision not to have any more children" she doesn't realize that she is hurting you, thinking that you are o.k. with your decision, ready to go on with your life, and may even thinks that she is being nice by including you. I think before you assume anything I would talk with her and see where she is coming from. You may be right but then again you may be wrong about her intentions. Good luck.

people are just rude and insensitive when it comes to things like this. You really need to stop and think when you do something like this. Your sil shouldn't do that unless you gave her the ok. I have been in this situation and I blew up.I know that I shouldn't have. But it was so close to right after my hyst I couldn't help it.

thanks for telling me I am not crazy!!!

Tara, Thanks for the input and I haven't said anything to her because I know that would be pleasing to her. I really just needed to hear it from you guys that she is a ******!!!!!! My other friends who are pregnant never really mention the pregnancy unless I ask. They always ask me how I am feeling first!!! My SIL never even called me when I was in the hospital or when i came home to see if i was ok. If you ever want to talk please message me.... it appears from your response we may have alot in common and we are close in age!!!! Not a common surgery for women of our age.

Your SIL doesn't sound like a nice person if she did this on purpose. How awful you must feel...it is like she rubbed your face in it or something. I am a firm believer in "what goes around comes around". I feel sorry for your SIL if something this hurtful comes back to hurt her. Only then will she understand how wrong it was to hurt you and only then will she experience the pain you went through.

I am truly sorry for your hurt and my goes out to you. I am sorry that your SIL has treated you this way and I know that you deserve better. Well, the ladies on this site care about you and can more than empathize with what you feel and what you have been through.

Sending lots of
Hang in there, it will get better!

thanks mustang,
I think the sad part of it is that if something like that happened to her she would use it to attention from everyone. it is really a shame because I have tried to be close to her as our children were born 4 days apart and my DH loves his brother and would love to spend more time with him. she just always does and says things that are hurtful so i gave up.

(((amberlyn)))
The hurt for you is the same whether she meant it or not. I'm so sorry. I'm sending some hugs too. I hope you can work this out with you sil. You may have to be honest with her so it doesn't blow up at some inappropriate time like Christmas or someone's birthday.
You might be surprised if you were to just tell her you are happy for her, but it is hurtful for you to see the pictures. She may just really not get it, but then it would be out in the open. If she continues you have your dh talk to his brother.
's, Rita

As for wondering why it hurts when we make the decision, I would like to know that, too.

We have a beautiful, almost 10 yo DD, and she is our only child. We tried to have more, but had 3 miscarriages after her. After the 3rd one, I decided that I could not go through it anymore and sent DH for a vasectomy. Almost 2 years ago, my SIL announced she was expecting, and for some reason it hurt. I love my SIL and was very happy for her, but I just felt like I was missing something.

Today, we have a beautiful 1 yo niece that we are totally in love with. I wonder how I will feel when my SIL announces that she is expecting again. I know that I will be happy for her, but I also know that I will feel a bit envious, and a bit of sadness for not being emotionally stronger to keep trying.

I am so sorry that she just showed them to you like that. I am sending hugs your way.

I understand how you feel...I am 30 and have no children except step-kids...I had one miscarriage in 2001 and that was hard enough..
I've felt funny at times about not having any female parts but more so just feeling "empty"..
What would get me before surgery was when I would tell people about the decison I would get " WHAT-YOU DONT HAVE KIDS" or " YOU KNOW YOULLL NEVER HAVE KIDS OR GRANDKIDS"...
Never did I really get any concerns about my health..RIght at first my mother even said" well- i was hoping you would give me a grandson"..
Doc discovered alot of problens inside me with the surgery and it was a blessing that I had a total hyster...My hubby told me that when he called my mom after I was done she actually made it sound like it was her idea that I need to have a hyst...
Good luck to you.....