Emotionally alone

Hi, I'm new at this and have a few quetions that I'm sure many have had to deal with.

They want to put me on Lupron to shrink endo and large uterus (sp? long day) for two months. I don't want to do it. Has anyone out there refused and still had the hyst?

I know I am very lucky to have the support of DH. My mom will fly in for the first 2-3 weeks then mother-in-law for 2-3. I am thankful more than I can show. However, no one understands that this has been a tramatic decision for me. I don't even know why. (I have 3 great kids and can't have more and am 37). No one gets the fact that recovery is 6-8 weeks. This means a lot of rest from what I have read here. They think I'm a whimp and should be up a week later back to normal. After the last laparotomy my mom wanted to know why I was still in bed a week later (they took a softball size cyst and ovary out, scraped as much stage 3 endo from the bladder colin, uterus...as could be done at that time, over 4 hours in OR). I'm still tender two months later.

Does anyone know where I can find a good article for family members to help them understand what I have gone through to take this step and how much love and understanding I will need in the months to come or am I being a baby. Should I "just pull myself up by the boot straps" as mother-in-law says.

Thank you for letting me vent and for any words of wisdom that you may have.

Just read your note and all I can say is "Wow". You know, my husband really didn't understand all that was happening to me before my surgery either, but he sure does understand it now! I remember yelling at him 2 days before my surgery (it was our 3rd wedding anniversary and he'd given me what I thought was a very inappropriate card) and he said that he'd still find me attractive even if I did have a big scar on my belly!

I was amazed that he wasn't even aware of what I was facing: 1) that I'd be facing "surgical menopause" and 2) was scared to heavens that I'd be facing cancer (which, it turned out, did happen). He was clueless but I guess he just wasn't thinking. He is a very dear man and very devoted to me and very supportive of my recovery.

I don't know what to tell you other than to keep in touch with all the ladies here. They're so wonderful. They'll help you through anything!

God bless!

Hi Wilting Rose,

Here is a link to a page of Frequently asked questions for Friends and Family ... this is sort of a Q&A for your family, to help prepare them. This is posted on the homepage here at Hystersisters:

https://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/hsa...hp?s=&id=99323

Like you, I had endometriosis and I refused Lupron. I had stage 4 endo and at age 46 had my TAH/BSO. I was offered Lupron, but I really didn't want to take it and when I asked my gyn if he thought it was worth putting myself through it, he said no. My endo was already at stage 4 when diagnosed ...

I'm so sorry to hear that your family is not giving you the support you need. I truly hope that they will come through for you once they see you after surgery. Maybe you can print some of the posts you read here that you think will help them get better perspective on this surgery ...

Sending gentle hugs your way.

Beth