Going to have to recover with no help

Does anyone have any suggestions to help? The only family I have is my 12 year old daughter, and although I know she will be a big help, I'm a bit afraid of the fact that I am going to have to do this recovery thing by myself for the most part. It's going to be hard, I know....but thank heavens for friends. I guess the main thing I am scared of, is being here by myself and something happen and there's nothing I can do about it. I'd appreciate anyone's input as to helpful hints that I can do prior to surgery to help myself once I get home. Thanks everyone.

LuLu,
First off let me start by saying I am sending you lotsa s!!!!! recovery is hard!!!!! The only advise I have for you is...be sure and follow the princess rules!!!!Drink, walk, rest!!!!!!Don't get constipated!!!!!!! Eat high protien diet so you can heal easier!!! Have that 12 yr. old DD doing things pre-op so she knows she can!!! Tell her what to look for in case of complications to where she would need to notify your doctor. Have his/her number available for her!!!!!! While she is at school, try to have friends checking in on you!!! That will eliminate some of the stress of worrying about being alone to recover!!! Have your daughter read Kathy's post about what I wish my family knew!!! That will give you tips for her!!!!!! (Gentle reminders!!!!!!!!)


I do know about not having anyone with me to recover. Not to the extent of what you are going to have. I am married, but my DH worked and was gone for 14 hours out of each day. I was left at home with twins that are 4 yrs. old and a 7 yr. old that came in after school! I did have complications that did make my recovery more difficult!!!! It is SO hard to sleep knowing that there are two four yr. olds basically on auto-pilot in the house!!! I thought I was gonna loose my mind!!!!!!

If your doctor gives you the okay to do tub baths, DO NOT TRY IT WHILE HOME ALONE!!!!!!! I did and it was a disaster!!!! I sat there freezing, crying until my DH came home and pulled me out!! OUCH!!!!!!!!! I do not advise that!!!!!! Showers can be just as refreshing.....in my case, it would have been more so!!!!!! I did this at week 2. I had been told it was safe to take tub baths from day one.....SAFE AND REALISTIC ARE TWO SEPARATE WORDS WITH TWO SEPARATE MEANINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Try to plan ahead as much as you can. It will help you in your recovery!!!!

I hope you have an uneventful surgery and recovery!!!!!! My thoughts and ers are with you!!!!!!!!

Take any help that is offered and request any you need!!!!

Ronda

Hi Lulu

You may want to ask your Dr. if you are eligible Home Care (Visiting Nurse or Home Health Aides).

Wishing you all the best!

Hysterhelp

Thank you both for such great ideas. I will definitely start making a list of what I need to ask my doctor about, and things I need to start doing to prepare. Ronda, I'm sorry you had complications, but I'm happy to see that you are still glad that you did it. And thank you for your prayers. I think we all need all the prayers that we can get.

Hi Lulu,

Happy to help in any way!!

When you ask your Dr. if you are eligible, make sure you mention that you are at home ALONE -- you will be homebound for atleast a week or two. If the Dr. mentions your daughter, make sure he knows that she is only 12 (no license, etc.).

That should help move it along and make the insurance company happy.

Take good care and Happy Thanksgiving!

Hysterhelp

Hi LuLu, I was also alone with only my 15 year old daughter to help. I'm now 11 days post-op and it really hasn't been that bad. What helped me most was shopping ahead of time so I had a lot of prepared and easy-to-prepare foods around. My daughter is good at getting me drinks and meds when needed so I don't have to get up and down a lot, and as for the housework - well, I just had to loosen my standards a little It also helped that I let her friend's parents know I wouldn't be able to drive for a couple weeks - they've been more than willing to drive her places when needed. If you have no other options it can be done as long as you're well prepared ahead of time.

Take care.

Laura:

Thanks for the input. It's nice to know that someone else is/was in the same situation that I am in. I'm sure that your daughter was a tremendous help to you, as mine will be to me. I've been reading some of the hints on here, and I think that if things get too messy around here I may end up hiring a cleaning crew to come in while I'm on the couch and pick up a little for me, if needed. The idea of having the home health nurse sounds a little comforting too.

Thanks to everyone for such wonderful suggestions. I can't tell you how happy I am to have found this website. You are all just wonderful, and are giving me a little bit more hope that things won't be as bad as I'm thinking they will. I look forward to reading on.

Hiya Lulu,

I would definitely do all your food shopping before hand and prepare as many meals before that can be popped out of the freezer and heated up.

You didn't mention what type of surgery you're having, but you should also shop now for things like medication for gas, stool softners, peroxide, gauze (incase you're having a TAH). You should ask your doctor before you go in what medications he plans on sending you home from the hospital with (pain killers, antibiotics, etc.) and whether or not he can give you those prescriptions now so you wont have to worry about getting them filled after you're home.

Another suggestion is to make sure you plan your recovery room carefully. Make sure you don't have a lot of stairs to climb, and have the telephone nearby incase of an emergency. I like the cordless, I can take it with me incase I need it. Your recovery room should be near the kitchen so you can get water and food and near the bathroom so you can get rid of the water and food. LOL

I had my sister with me the first week, she helped me get out of bed when I was too tired to pull myself up, went on walks with me so I wasn't alone if I got tired or dizzy and she cooked meals for me. I probably could have done it alone, but it was nice having someone there for security (I had a TAH).

Best of luck with your upcoming surgery.

Mary Ellen

Hi LuLu..........that is a tremendous responsibility you and your daughter are both taking on here......but certainly one that is quite possible for the both of you.

I have a couple of suggestions:

A) Make sure your daughter has someone to contact that she can VENT with, as it will have an affect on her as well with your surgery and recovery

B) If it is affordable, why not think about some frozen dinners. They make ones that are quite edible these days compared to those of yonder years.

C) DEFINITELY get the pain meds, etc., filled before you go into the hospital. Tell your doctor your situation and they will help in this regard. It will be far easier to have them home and ready for you, rather than DD having to take care of this issue.

D) Relax all the standards and let things happen as they will for your 12 year old daughter. She will be hoping to make things as easy for you as possible, praise her for her actions on your behalf and make sure she knows how much you appreciate it.

E) Let the little things go that are not that important. Don't tell her she is not folding things right (bath towels, etc), just let her get done what needs to be done, without the worry of being perfect.

F) Relax yourself and make sure that you rest, drink plenty of fluids, eat properly and if possible be on the 1st floor for sleeping, if you live in a two-story home.

I wish you the best of luck. I really liked the advice of having daughter start doing some of this ahead of time, to gauge her reactions to things, see how she does with things, etc. That would certainly be a help in easing the minds of both of you for this event.



Happy Thanksgiving future to be!

lulu,

it sure is nice to hear that someone else in here is going through the same problems. my surgery is dec. 1st (monday) and my dh is being activated on dec 7th (he's in the reserves). i will only be home 3 days before he has to leave. the only assistance i will have is from my 21 yr old daughter who doesn't drive or cook. i talked my dh into getting me a small chest freezer so that i will be able to have some frozen foods in there for my dd to nuke in the microwave. i have no earthly clue how i'm gonna get to the doctor, etc. i live in the country miles away from anything...let alone my doctor.

here's to the both of us having a speedy recovery.

debbie