feeling alone..except for you guys!!!

Fullof hope~ YOU TOTALLY HAVE ALL OF US!! Please please feel free to pm me or email me....i would love too listen too you vent..as all of us will!!!

Goofygoddedd~
YOU KILL ME..LOL I hear ya about the crying spells. i do the same thing!!! when my inlaws called yestarday...after my dh hung up with them...i just balled my eyes out! not 5 min. before i was dancing around with the baby and being silly. and he hung up the phone and i went on a hyster twister!! blabbing how "oh now its a BIG DEAL cause your dad had polyps removed?",,,,BLAH BLAH BLAH...and the dh didtn even make a BIG deal out of it!! i think it bothered me cause...the MIL called my dh a said "call your father he just got home" like my dh is a kid...and that led too me yelling how "WELL THAT HAVENT CALLED ME AND MY POLYOPS WHERE REMOVED IN JULY..THEY HAVENT CALLED AND MY UTERUS IS BEING REMOVED IN 14 DAYS, AND NOW WE HAVE TOO CALL HIM",,,not gonna say what else i said!! lol..my poor poor dh..this is his Dad!!!
and they crying kept coming for an hour!!! i went and got my kids from school..my dh did there h.w. with them and i fell asleep on the couch,,,i think i exhausted myself!!! lol
i woke up with a HEADCHE SO BAD....and all the DH said was "where my parents worth getting so worked up over?" i said i dont know,,,but WOW DID IT FEEL GOOD WHEN I WAS ON A ROLL">>.lollolol
scotty

*LOL* Get this! My brother and sister-in-law have yet to call me! My surgery was originally scheduled for Sept. 18th but then I had to embark on a Zena Menstrual Warrior Princess battle with the insurance trolls when they denied it. Won the battle and I am back on the schedule again. Well, my Mom told my brother (a joe-bank manager type) & sister-in-law (a pharmacist) about the surgery when I originally was scheduled. Haven't heard a peep out of them. Now here's the ironic part. When their cat (that's right...like furry, meow pet-type being) had to have surgery they expected us to call daily (actually more my SIL did) to check on the furry one's progress and well being! Severe nastiness occurred when I didn't take a break every day to call. If we didn't call we recieved a looooooooooong and detailed account of miss kitty's progress, meds, case studies of the same surgery and a not at the bottom that said..."not that you care!" What in the name of cheese and rice is up with that???? I usually don't give a rat's pahtootie about what people think but this just chaps my ample hiney! I am going to drop them a brief and award winningly mellowdramatic email today just to FYI them. That will at least make ME feel better! Who raised these people? Wolves??
*LOL* Things that make you go hmmmmm huh?

Huggage!
Kim

Hey all,

One piece of advice that I was given years ago has helped me a lot through parent and in-law issues - "the only person you can change is yourself."

My mom has been the way she is for decades, and I cannot make her change (as much as I would like to!!) So, i have to set the boundaries that I need to (I don't want you at the hospital after my surgery or I don't need you to stay with me once I get home) and let the rest go. I decided a long time ago that I was going to do my best to direct my energies to the things I can do something about!

Our relationship improved once I figured this out - even though she is not always happy with some of my decisions - we get along better, partly cause I don't worry so much about her actions or opinions.

This doesn't happen overnight - took me a while to get here - but worth it.

I hope this makes some sense - if not, just think of it as the ravings of a sister dealing with hormones!



beditor

I have kind of the opposite problem. I'd rather have my Mom with me than my hubby. I just got married in December and having been single the 10 years before that, I am more used to depending on Mom to help me when I need it. Mom keeps saying, I'll be there for you, but you have to let your hubby be there too. My hubby is not a real good caregiver as far as I can tell and he hates hospitals. He likes to tell a story about where he was once visiting a friend in the hospital and passed out (from the stress??) and woke up on a gurney with nurses around him trying to figure out if he was on drugs or something!! He also left the hospital right after his son was born to go racing, said he wouldn't be any use to son or son's mother. He's already said that since I'll be out of it at the hospital I won't know if he's there or not. But he did say he would be there. And Mom said 'you know I'll be there, you *know* I'll be there'. My dh is a great guy, don't get me wrong, and I love him but he's a man kind of a man, you know? Not a caregiver type. Also, my very best friend in all the world, won't be there for me at all. I spent the nights with her in the hospital when she had her hysterectomy 2 years ago, because she was afraid to be left alone. But she doesn't drive out of town so I know she won't be there for me. I keep telling myself that that is just the way she is, and it doesn't in any way change the love I know she feels for me, and it has always been this way, me right there for her, and her just a phone call away for me. Still......sometimes I wish she'd see that I need to feel cared for too. Anyway, I'm just cranky right now, funny how that hits you out of the blue!!

I hope with all my heart that we all feel better soon!!

Is it just me....or does that alone feeling come and go with everyone. Obviously earlier today I felt strong and up to the challenge. Now I am finding myself feeling like no one around me is taking the seriousness of what I am going throgh (and about to go through) as they should. When I talk about the surgery or being afraid people tend to get that far away look in their eyes and then take the first opportunity to change the subject. Like I am blowing the whle deal out of proportion. Ugh. Just babbling here butthis is how I am feeling.

Kim

I am soooo relieved to hear about the crying spells. I am not a "cryer" but making up for lost tears I suppose. So far DH is being great about it, I am 6 weeks away so I hope he can take my rollercoaster ride. My big confusion is my 3 DD's 24, 20 and 17. They appear so flippant about it. I can more understand it with 17 y.o. she has expressed fear over mom having surgery. But my oldest who says I am one of her best friends, avoids the subject like the plague. I feel maybe I am being selfish, she has a 2 y.o. and expecting March 1. My best friend has said she is taking the day and the night off work to be there. I was her rock 4 years ago when she had surgery for cancer. I couldn't do this without her. She however cannot understand my fears and anxiety especially considering she is a "survivor". I feel like I am loosing my mind (maybe I alredy did!)

Stacy

I think alot of people tend to push away from those with medical issues because it frightens them. My stepdaughter (20) doesn't seem like she could care less, hasn't called and when told said "O.K....so I'm having this problem with me car and..." Sheesh! I sat up nights with her when she was sick or had nightmares. My stepson (18) on the otherhand is very concerned, has offered to help out and wants to know all the gory details. Go figure! I'm just going to focus on me. Me me me me me me me! Selfish? Darned tootin'! *LOL*

Scotty, hang onto the ones that DO understand and concentrate on them. They will get you through. That's what I do. I don't worry about the ones who are indifferent as long as I have the ones who aren't. I think of this everytime I look into my DH eyes. I want to hold onto him so tight. He has gotten me through a lot in my life. I love that man to pieces. Hang onto your DH, too. He seems like he could be the best for you.

Good luck on your surgery. You are going in two days after me. God bless you. And you will never have anyone turn a deaf ear here. We all in the same boat and understand a wide range of feelings.