Just sharing ...

Hi, I am a 39-year-old American woman living in Finland. I am so happy to have found this community. I am far away from home, and I don't have many friends and no close family members here, except for my husband, who is Finnish.

A little about me. Shortly after I moved here I found a gynecologist who discovered I have four fibroids, of the variety that grow inside the lining of the uterus. The two largest and of most concern are 5 and 6 cms. in size and they sit very close to one another and appear to be close to fusing together. I have seen five doctors here. (I should mention that four were at the same hospital and working from each other's notes and images, although they each performed their own ultrasound and pelvic exam.) Four immediately said SAH hysterectomy with very little in the way of hesitation. (I say SAH to mean just the uterus. I will keep my cervix and ovaries.)

I was a little surprised that other options weren't brought up or discussed, and I am a little scared that because this is a national health service, there isn't the time or money to properly explore other options. (For the record, the healthcare here is great. I was just a little shocked that the docs went straight to SAH without wanting to explore some of the treatments I've read about, including diet, herbs, supplements and natural hormones.)

I paid to visit a private doctor who is known in our town for being more open to alternative medicine, which, for the record, I am. She didn't have an ultrasound in her office but said that if I didn't want the hysterectomy I shouldn't have it, so long as I am prepared to live with the symptoms. I have very heavy bleeding and abdominal protusion that is not painful yet very uncomfortable. Vain it may sound, but I think the symptom I hate the most is wearing a size 6 everywhere except my abdomen, which needs a 10 or a 12! Finding clothes that fit is impossible!

I asked the four doctors who recommended SAH about alternatives, they said that the fibroids are too large to begin to treat with drugs or hormones, and that the position of the two in near-collision is of great concern. One doctor said there also appeared to have been a .5 cm growth in one of the fibroids since February, another great concern, in her opinion. The doctors also said that the position of the fibroids, in the lining, meant myomectomy and other target procedures were not possible.)

My friends back in the USA are pressuring me to come home to explore all the treatments offered in the US. I feel so torn. My husband and I have very little money. Were I to explore all the other options, it would mean borrowing at least a couple thousand and then of course if I actually wanted to try the treatments it could mean another several thousand. On top of our financial woes, my husband is handicapped, so I don't want to be away for long. One of the doctors said very kindly that, in his opinion, I would very likely come full-circle to hysterectomy anyhow.

If hysterectomy is the best option, I am prepared. I trust the surgeons here, and I will even have nurses help me at home after the surgery and disability for six weeks off work, etc.

It's just that I am scared. I have taken medication for depression for many years. After I met my husband nearly five years ago and moved to Finland a year and a half ago, I started going off the medicine. I have become very physically active here, with all the skiing and walking folks do here, and feel healthier and happier than I ever have.

In short, I am afraid of hormonal changes sending me back into a depression.

I have worked so hard to be emotionally healthy with therapy, diet and exercise, and by slowly and carefully reducing my daily dose of celexa. I have also settled into a new life here, into a new marriage, a new culture with two new languages.

Will having a hysterectomy reverse all my progress? I am not asking in hopes of a forecast. I know I cannot expect that here. But that is my fear expressed in a nutshell.

(On another, perhaps less important note, I also have this obsessive fear of losing my hair. I already have somewhat thinning hair and I fret in front of the mirror over it often. I'm so scared that the hormonal imbalance will make me bald!)

One doctor said it was possible to wait and have the operation later, but it could be a year because of the waiting lists. She looked me in the eye and said it could entail a risk.

Thanks for listening. I feel so scared a frustrated. My surgery is scheduled for Nov. 2! Anyhow, this is way too long for something initially meant as a mere introduction. I probably should have posted this rant somewhere else on the Web site, but I am too freaked out to find the right place just now. Just writing this here and now has helped a lot! Perhaps the chance to express my fear is simply what I have needed all along!

Again, am so glad to have found the forum and look forward to leaning into it in the days leading up to my surgery. If anyone has any thoughts regarding depression and hormone imbalance following SAH I'd be grateful especially for their insights. Thanks!

Best wishes,
Kokkolady

Hi kokkolady!

Just to let you know, ten years ago, I was able to get a myomectomy for 12 fibroids, some as large as 12 cm and withing the uterus wall, but I had to really search for a gynecologist with the skills to do it: five other doctors before him recommended a hysterectomy,and I was only 33! From what I've gathered, a myomectomy is often more complex to do than a hysterectomy. Three years ago, the fibroids grew back, and this time, I tried an ambolization: it "bought" some time until I was ready for the hysterectomy, which I got last week, completely ready for it.

Keep exploring your options, while listening to what the doctors have to say and what their arguments are: you are in charge f your body, and your health is the most important thing! Good luck!

Hi Kokkolady
Welcome to this wonderful site!!

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One doctor said it was possible to wait and have the operation later, but it could be a year because of the waiting lists. She looked me in the eye and said it could entail a risk.

What is the risk that the wait would entail??
Waiting lists are very familiar to me. I am now on a wait list for urodynamics testing that I will not likely have until next summer. After that, there is over a year waiting period for the surgery. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired!!!!!
I guess you can tell the direction my advice will go, but you have to weigh the pros and cons. Make a list of them.

	Quote:
I have very heavy bleeding and abdominal protusion that is not painful yet very uncomfortable.

The heavy bleeding could very well be affecting your iron levels or iron store levels. This can cause, among other things, extreme fatigue. This would turn the healthy lifestyle that you have acquired around a bit if you are too exhausted to participate. (My fatigue levels have increased to a point where I just work and do very little at home and have no social life and most of this has come since February.)
Will the discomfort become pain if the fibroids grow more or if the small growth in one of them grows more?

	Quote:
On top of our financial woes, my husband is handicapped

I face this as well. My husband has Cerebral Palsy and has had a heart attack, so is very limited in what he can do. I understand your concern there.

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Will having a hysterectomy reverse all my progress?

No one can be certain, but I really don't think so. If everything is as it should be, it may be the best thing you ever did. This could be your route to better health to add to your new and wonderful lifestyle.
Again, make a list of the pros and cons because only you can make this decision.
I hope that I have not made it more difficult for you.
I wish you all the best and will pray for guidance for you as you make your decision.
Hugs,
Suzanne

I also was very interested in alternative medicine - tried acupuncture, mayan uterine massage, chinese herbs etc. I had fibroids/endo/adeno. I finally gave agreed a year ago (age 40 and childless) to a hysterectomy and it's the best thing I've ever done for myself! No bleeding, no monthly pain, and no prego-belly! I wish I had done it a decade ago! It's probably psychological but I believe my moods are better and I also have less gas. Crazy but true.

Hi Kokkolady!
One advantage I think you have is that you've been placing more care in your health and you might find that aids in your recovery. I share your fear with hormone disruption and am also treated for an anxiety/depressive disorder, but you can always keep your ovaries if the uterine fibroids are the only concern. That way you can retain the natural occuring hormones in your body. I have read that some abdominal procedures are required with uterine fibroids, but you could ask about other methods. I just had a Laprascopic Assisted Vaginal Hysterectomy and its less invasive. Read as much as you can about your alternatives, but if there is a good health care system in Finland and you're confident this will ease your condition-don't be afraid. Read through some of the testimonials and stories of the women on this site-it is really helpful in showing both sides but also giving confidence to such a big decision. Good luck to you, I wish you well. Let us know how you make out.

Thanks, everyone. This site is indeed a godsend.

Redhead65...thank you so much for your encouraging reply. Yes, the doctor here feels a myomectomy would be too complicated in my case. He said he would consider if I wish him too. For example, he'd consider it if I wanted to conceive in the future. But that's not an issue for us...

Canadian Lady...thank you also for thoughtful response. I think the doctor was concerned at the .5 cm growth since Feb. To clarify, I didn't have a .5 growth ON the fibroid .The fibroid itself had enlarged .5 cm. So she was concerned about the seemingly rapid expansion, and felt putting off the surgery could be risky as a result.

Lindywen. Thank you! (I love the name Lindy. One of my best friends is named Lindy and I miss her so much.) It's funny you should mention Mayan abdominal. One of my closest friends has just returned from Belize where she got the certification. She practices in New York. She is really sad I am doing this without properly exploring Mayan and Rosa's tonics, etc. It is a comfort and an inspiration to know you have experienced it - and also that your hysterectomy has been such a success, as it is the path I ultimately have chosen.

And thanks Hoping4happy! Encouraging to know someone out there who has the same concern regarding depression and hormones. Yes, I am hoping there is a chance my ovaries will regain full function and that I will experience little in the way of imbalance. I am doing my best to prepare for a bumpy landing and take off, but trying to remain positive and trust that this is the path. Will definitely keep you posted and please let me know how you fare, and if you learn anything new along the way. Many thanks!

Hi. Thank you for sharing your story and I am so glad you found this site too! I don't know how I would have made it through my recovery without it!

I'm never comfortable suggesting what someone should do but I am comfortable saying that we have to follow our hearts and our instincts, they always lead us in the right way. Although I know how hard it is sometimes to figure them out.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and know that you will make the right decision. I can tell you that I had a TAH and have had little to no mood swings or depression. I have suffered from depression on and off my whole life and I was scared about how I would come out after the hyst. So far, I am better than ever and do not regret my decision one bit.

Best wishes to you. You will find a lot of support on this site.

Everyone has their own opinion of what is right for them. Bummer that you have a system that seems to be dictating how you will solve your situation.

I can say that, when my Dr. recommended an LSH, after my first complaint (after years of horrid periods) I was jumping up and down. Finally, I could be rid of this issue. I have never looked back. For me, it was a great decision.

I hope to never have another surgery, but I am happy that I had this one....and it was a positive one....everything went well and I actually enjoyed my recovery time.

Hi Kokkolady - I just had a DaVinci hyst done on the 20th. I had 9 gigantic fibroids - some of them fast growing as well. The surgeon had to make a few more incisions than normal to deal with manipulating, reducing and extracting my huge uterus and its ugly fibroid friends, So far I am calling the surgery a success. Even with the post-op pain, I feel better than I did pre-op.
Good luck in making your decision and best wishes on your healing journey.

BTW - What is the Mayan method that you all have been referencing?

Thanks, shoesister! Encouraging to read your post. Good luck! If you do a google search on Rosa Arvigo and Mayan abdominal massage you will find the site and more information about this massage method. I must be clear that I only know what I have read in connection with Rosa Arvigo. (Not sure if there are other schools of Mayan thought out there.)

She lives in Belize where she teaches the Mayan massage technique and performs research and cures for reproductive problems and disease with herbs grown in the rain forest. She has been studying them for years and has become a pioneer in this area of expertise, is my understanding. In a nutshell, the theory is that when a woman's uterus becomes shifted or is off balance, an environment in the abdomen is created in which disease such as fibroids and endometriosis flourish. The massage involves manipulation that puts the uterus back in its original place, restoring balance.

I only know what I have learned from a friend who is certified in this method, and she is very gung ** about it. I don't know how doctors feel about this theory, or the masage, etc. I have never met anyone who has received the massage, although I think there are testimonies on her web site. (Of course they are all positive accounts!)

Hope that helps! Best of luck to you.