18 days to go

Well, I have 18 more days before my surgery, and I feel like I'm on a never ending rollercoaster ride. I have cried more in the last few days than I have in my entire lifespan thus far. My DH is away for training right now, due back in a few days, but it's like a major part of what is supposed to be my support system is gone. I talked to my neighbor, who is supposed to be a friend, and things she said to me were supposed to be in comfort, but seemed more like a non-chalant "oh you'll be fine, you've already got children, you'll get over it" kind of thing which REALLY hit a nerve. I am trying to not think about it, and trying hard to remain strong & positive, but I am finding it rather difficult to do. My DS and DD are very curious as to what is happening, and I did a google search and found videos somewhat suitable for their ages and maturity levels to help explain what is happening and what I am going to endure...it seems to have helped the three of us to have a better understanding. I am trying very hard to not cry at this very moment, it's not that I need to cry, I just can't really control it at this point...I'm still a little apprehensive about this, but I've reached a point that I can't wait for it to all be said & done so that I can get back on a "normal" level and stop this never ending cycle of crying and not being able to sleep. I've been trying to keep myself busy with household chores to get my mind off of it, but it works for about 5 min, and then it hits me all over again....any advice on things you ladies have done to try to keep focused on something other than the surgery would be greatly appreciated...going to try to do an early "family game night" and take in a movie today to see if maybe that will help for a while...at least for a few hours.

This waiting is getting to me!! Help!!

The waiting is indeed the hardest part! It sounds like you have reason enough to have this surgery. I know that I kept thinking "I will feel soooo much better afterwards" I do not know what your belief system is, bu if you have a faith, know this; God has you in the palm of His hand, and He will be with you every step of the way.Trust your Doc, he/she has probably done many hysts. You do not say how old your kiddos are, but they can do lots to help mom afterwards. You could make up a chart (together) of ways they can help you when you get home. If you like to cook, prepare some meals ahead for the freeezer. Cooking is great therapy!
Concentrate on Christmas, Have a blessed one!