10 days post-op/feeling depressed

10 days post-op/feeling depressed

Hello,
CAN ANYONE PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVISE,MY SPOUSE IS TREATING ME LIKE I HAVE A DISEASE. FIRST, LET ME SAY THAT HE WASN'T THER FOR MY SURGERY(which was a hurtn thing)HE WENT TO THE MARDI GRA, HE'S SAYS THAT I KEPT PUTTING MY SURGERY OFF,BUT HE DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT I WAS TRYING TO DO OTHER THINGS THAT MY DR. RECOMMENDED BEFORE SURGERY BUT THE INSURANCE WOULDN'T COVER IT AND SURGERY WAS THE LAST RESORT. AND NOW THAT HE HAS RETURNED HE NEVER ASKED ME HOW I FEEL HE DON'T CALL AND CHECK ON ME, IF IT WASN'T FOR MY KIDS AND MY OLDER SISTER I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO.
HE SLEEPS ON THE VERY I MEAN THE"VERY"EDGE OF THE BED AND DOES THINGS TO GET ME UPSET. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVISE ON WHAT TO DO BECAUSE I AM ABOUT TO JUST BREAK DOWN. WHEN I GET BACK UP ON MY FEET I THINK THAT ME AND MY KIDS WILL BE 'MOVING FORWARD'.PLEASE KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS.

P.S. IS IT TRUE THAT I CAN'T DRIVE FOR 4-6WKS?

Isorrels...I am so sorry that you are going through this. Bless your heart. How long have you been married, how old are your kids?
Some people are just so self centered that they can't seem beyond their own needs.
Try not to listen to him, (I know that's easier said and done), take care of YOURSELF. Can you go some place else to rest?

I am so sorry that your DH is not being supportive through this but thank goodness for your Children and Sister. You are so early post op it really is important to take care of yourself.

I know it is difficult to live in the same house as someone being mean to you but try to keep out of his way as much as possible so that he doesn't get a chance to upset you.

Once you have fully recovered and have the energy to think straight you will be in a position to make decisions for the longer term.

Hugs

Hello,
If I were in your situation I would talk to him, ask him what he is thinking. Don't let this get out of hand.
Call your sister to help by helping you make a romantic night. Arrange candles, order dinner in, rent a movie you both would like., get rid of the kids for the night. This will set up the "set" to talk with him.
Of course sex is not an option but you can sit with him on the couch, hold his hand, let him know that things are still the same in your heart.
I know what you may think, why do this for him, if he's not doing anything for you. I believe in marriage, choose your battles, think about your wedding day, think about the times he was so romantic and loving.
You are both the same people when you got married. Think about how you feel when you're apart, is this something you can deal with for the long run?
He may be scared or frustrated. Men are very private and sexual beings. He may be on his side of the bed because he is trying not to be tempted by you. He may be lashing out because he is hurt. You won't ever know if you don't talk to him. Ask him these questions, you may be surprised.
The most important thing to remember is to never accept violence. If you are being hurt then you do need to get away no questions asked.

The Sisters above have said wonderful words. Please reread them.

I don't think you should drive if you are still on narcotics. I started driving within a week. I wasn't on painkillers and I made it a very short drive the first couple times. Just take it slow and easy. The anesthesia has to get out of your body so you think clearly.

Best Wishes!

Hello My Sisters,
THANKS APRIL FOR THE ADVICE ON HOW TO USE THE THREAD.
I'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 19YRS,LONG ENOUGH FOR MY HUSBAND TO KNOW HOW HE SHOULD TREAT ME. I HAVE 3 GIRLS 23,15 AND 12 AND 1 SON 19 IN WHICH I LOVE SO MUCH AND THE 23 YR OLD HAS A DAUGHTER 4 AND SHE REALLY AWESOME!I JUST ASK U ALL TO KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS, I'M GONNA BLOCK ALL THE NEGATIVE ENERGY OUT AND CONCENTRATE ON GETTING BETTER, SO I CAN MOVE FORWARD!

lsorrels
________
LASH 2-24-2009 only had uterus removed