This last week really IS hard !!

Ok, I know you all have heard this before, but I'm six days from surgery and starting to get really anxious.

I'm very comfortable with my doc, the hospital, and the surgery itself. I've packed my bag with the basic items recommended. I bought my loose recovery outfits and underwear. I've purchased my body pillow and my bed wedge (yeah) and a bed tray, so I can eat, type, read, etc...in bed.

My issue is that I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder which is well-controlled by meds, but when I am seriously anxious, the OCD rears its ugly ugly head, making me crazy!!

I was actually feeling good about the whole procedure/situation cuz I MUST be pain free, cancer free, and feeling better! But now I am finding myself unable to sleep or relax, and very obsessive.

The main component of my OCD concerns my complexion...I am freakishly paranoid about pimples, blemishes, blotchiness and redness. I was having a really good time w/controlling the OCD, but now I find myself waking up to check my complexion, and noticing every morning that I have new huge pimples and blotchiness. It's getting worse each morning (to me...DH sees nothing), which makes me stress. It's a vicious cycle.

I realize this sounds so trivial considering the big picture, but I guess I just didn't think my OCD would flare like this. My dr. called in some strong anti-anxiety meds, so that will help.

Sorry to ramble...I just thought I'd spend this week resting and relaxing and preparing my room and packing my bag. Now I find myself exhausted and freaked out every day and unable to get much done !

Help!! I tried to do a search on this type of thing, but was unable to get what I was looking for.

Any thoughts, suggestions, comforting words would be greatly appreciated!!!

Wow. This site and you Ladies are wonderful, and I would not want to go through this without the added support.

Sigh...

I'm so sorry FallBride that the last week has been so bad. I wasn't nervous at all until the last week and then it really hit. So, you are certainly not alone in feeling the way you do. I think calling your doctor was a great idea and hope the meds help.

Do as much as you can to keep your brain occupied with things you like to do - work, reading, movies, walking - whatever it is.

Just remember, you are not alone. And, if it helps at all, I found the waiting to be the absolute worst part of the whole thing.

Fall Bride...
While I don't have OCD... I do have severe GAD..... so that puts us somewhat in the same boat..and sister.... I know what you mean about the anxiety's..... once again I have no magical words of advice for you.... but if I recall correctly... you are newly married right??.... so just get your hubby to do what Dave does for me.... in bed... before we go to sleep.... he just holds me... gently rubs my back.... and lets me vent out all my stresses and anxietys....he doesn't judge or even comment... he just rubs and holds.... it works wonders I tell ya.... between the back rubs... and yes.... I almost forgot... he goes up to my head and strokes my hair.... much like you do to a baby..... just gently kissing my forehead.... it has such a calming effect......and sometimes if I have bad anxiety during the day..... I type.... vent typing.... much like journaling.... but it's on the computer.....LOL.... that works too....
hope this helps... and I am with you in spirit through this