a little irritated

I know everything's going to work out but right now I'm irritated. My husband is AD USMC and he has already put in a leave request for my surgery. He got a call today saying that he can take ten days but after that I have to go get a note from my surgeon saying I need him for however more days. The kicker is my surgeon already wrote a letter to his command saying I would be down at least three weeks. They are saying that they won't accept it because "I might be just fine by then". The guy who approves it , his wife had the same surgery and was up running the house a week later. However she had davinci where nine night end up tah.

Sorry im rambling but.I'm a little mad

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Originally Posted by erinkgarcia86 I know everything's going to work out but right now I'm irritated. My husband is AD USMC and he has already put in a leave request for my surgery. He got a call today saying that he can take ten days but after that I have to go get a note from my surgeon saying I need him for however more days. The kicker is my surgeon already wrote a letter to his command saying I would be down at least three weeks. They are saying that they won't accept it because "I might be just fine by then". The guy who approves it , his wife had the same surgery and was up running the house a week later. However she had davinci where nine night end up tah. Sorry im rambling but.I'm a little mad

Shame you have extra worries before your surgery. Perhaps your doctor could write another letter explaining more strongly that you will definitely need the 3 weeks due to extra complications of your surgery or something. Otherwise at one week post op have your doctor scheduled (or have pre-written) a letter confirming you need your hubby for the extra time. Good luck

I agree with Katscoz about the more firm doctor's letter, stating that it will be necessary for you to have your husband home for 3 weeks or however long you determine. Can you ask the doctor or his nurse to help you out? Theres no way to predict what your recovery will be like and it's not fair for there to be unrealistic expectations of you. Especially considering that the doctor is going to tell you NOT to be active and resume daily work for several weeks in order for you to have a successful recovery. You only get one shot at this recovery, and you deserve to get to do it right. Sorry you have to push the issue. ...As if it's not stressful enough making all of these life-changing decisions and going under the knife!

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Originally Posted by lovemytemple I agree with Katscoz about the more firm doctor's letter, stating that it will be necessary for you to have your husband home for 3 weeks or however long you determine. Can you ask the doctor or his nurse to help you out? Theres no way to predict what your recovery will be like and it's not fair for there to be unrealistic expectations of you. Especially considering that the doctor is going to tell you NOT to be active and resume daily work for several weeks in order for you to have a successful recovery. You only get one shot at this recovery, and you deserve to get to do it right. Sorry you have to push the issue. ...As if it's not stressful enough making all of these life-changing decisions and going under the knife!

I'm going to talk to him further when I see him*later today, his office is two hours from my home so its going to be a total pain in the butt. My husband is frustrated and I'm upset. Either way my poor hubby will have to drive to pick up that letter! It's annoying how his command works. At our old command this wouldn't even be an issue they would just say check in every few days see ya. I guess things are different when your part of a recruit training command.

Although recovery is 4-6 weeks, and everyone heals differently, I like many was on my own the whole time with no one at home besides 3 poodles, and a ride to and from the hospital. I had abdominal, the first three days were tough, however I really was feeling pretty good within a week and just took it really easy for the next 3 weeks. Of course if you have kids and need to fetch and carry then you may need him for that extra time, but otherwise you should be fine. There are of course the other considerations such as financial (unless all his extra leave is paid) and whether he wants to use up extra vacation time or unpaid.
As long as he understands that there wont be a hot dinner waiting for him when he gets home, that the house may be messy and he may have to do some laundry - you could of course get a housekeeper in for a couple of hours - then you should be fine.
Hope things work out whatever way you decide

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Originally Posted by NewinNC2012 Although recovery is 4-6 weeks, and everyone heals differently, I like many was on my own the whole time with no one at home besides 3 poodles, and a ride to and from the hospital. I had abdominal, the first three days were tough, however I really was feeling pretty good within a week and just took it really easy for the next 3 weeks. Of course if you have kids and need to fetch and carry then you may need him for that extra time, but otherwise you should be fine. There are of course the other considerations such as financial (unless all his extra leave is paid) and whether he wants to use up extra vacation time or unpaid. As long as he understands that there wont be a hot dinner waiting for him when he gets home, that the house may be messy and he may have to do some laundry - you could of course get a housekeeper in for a couple of hours - then you should be fine. Hope things work out whatever way you decide

We have two young children including an autistic two year old who is more on a one year old level. His leave is paid, a benefit of the military. He needs to be home

I hope you are able to get the extra leave time. You are probably away from family being in the military and unable to have family and/or friends help you with the children and the household duties.

You are really lucky since he has paid leave. Yes you will need help with the kids, hope his extra leave gets approved

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Originally Posted by Norway Lynn I hope you are able to get the extra leave time. You are probably away from family being in the military and unable to have family and/or friends help you with the children and the household duties.

Yes ma'am we are 18 hours from our family and my.mother is an accountant for her own firm and April is way busy. His mom us in the middle of a kidney transplant.

We have good friends near but they have full time jobs.

Believe this comes under FMLA and it is federal law that if you are incapacitated for a serious health condition and under a physician's care then your spouse can have off the necessary time to care for you. (up to 12 weeks in the civilian world) Your doctor's office should be able to help you with this and they may even have the necessary forms. It's worth asking the questions.
Blessings for you and your family. (We have a son with autism. I know what it's like.)