dVH/RALH: 5 days pre-op, worried, scared, need to vent

Indiotiger,
First thing you need to do is take a few deep cleansing breaths. Inhale through your nose then slowly exhale through your mouth. As you exhale imagine all of your fear and tension flowing out of your body. Focus on nothing but the air entering and leaving your body. Every time those thoughts try to sneak their way back in, forcibly push them out.
I have panic attacks an this has always worked for me. It's also a great way to fall asleep if you combine it with some soft soothing music.
Good luck and best wishes. We are all here whenever you need shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold.

I do appreciate all the good words and suggestions from you wonderful women! I am starting to feel a little calmer. Maybe just because my surgery is just under three days away. Today I had my pre-op appointment with the gyno-oncologist surgeon. I feel really confident that he will do a good job, and he gave me straight answers to my questions, not sugar-coating things and saying "oh don't worry". That actually made me feel better. I am sure that there will still be tears on my part, in the next few days, but I still have a lot to do to get my home ready for me, and for the folks that will be staying here to help me recover. This site is a real blessing.