TLH I miss sex!!!

First I have to say that I am so blessed to have an amazing husband who has been loyal and true to me for the last 13+ years. I am deeply in love with him and I never take that blessing for granted.

That being said, I know a lot of women experience a surge of hormones after surgery and start feeling really frisky. That is NOT what I am going through. What I am missing is being close and intimate with the person I love. I had 3 weeks under my belt and then had to have a second surgery so my abstinence sentence has started all over again

I have also been very blessed that I have felt good emotionally and hormonally since my original surgery on 11/22. I have felt very happy mostly because I have been living in chronic pain for many years now and I feel like I will no longer be a prisoner of that pain. Having my left ovary removed essentially removed one of my greatest pain sources. So I haven't really been experiencng any real overall depression, and if anything, I feel more balanced hormonally.

But now that I can't have sex for another 5-6 weeks or more I am starting to have some sadness and depression specifically where that topic is concerned. I hug my husband about 50 times a day, but that obviously isn't even close to the same thing. And I know that "messing around" is off limits because the nerves and muscles inside need to heal and not be contracting.

I just feel like I am going to lose it if I have to wait that long to be with him again. I would love to just lay in bed and cuddle up with him, but he says that makes it even harder for him. Sex is very emotional for me and definitely not just a physical thing so it hurts my heart to wait this long. I haven't been crying at all post op, but this makes me want to cry and I feel like at some point I am going to end up having a meltdown. It's that awful feeling like when something has been taken away from you and then you crave and long for it even more!!

Does anyone else miss sex so much that it is making them sad??? How do I survive this part???

Try to put Your mind somewhere else. Coz Your Not helping yourself doing That. Just look at the bright later on how's That. Anyway was Gonna ask u a question. Since u had Your second surgery do u Still Have spotting like orange pink color? I had my second surgery too last Nov. 29. Cuff restitched and Dr said I had hematoma too. But I Just never had a day without spotting yet. Not much but wondering if u experience this. And Dr said no sex for 3mos
. Hope my bf will wait That long sigh. .

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Originally Posted by CrazyDaizy99 First I have to say that I am so blessed to have an amazing husband who has been loyal and true to me for the last 13+ years. I am deeply in love with him and I never take that blessing for granted. That being said, I know a lot of women experience a surge of hormones after surgery and start feeling really frisky. That is NOT what I am going through. What I am missing is being close and intimate with the person I love. I had 3 weeks under my belt and then had to have a second surgery so my abstinence sentence has started all over again I have also been very blessed that I have felt good emotionally and hormonally since my original surgery on 11/22. I have felt very happy mostly because I have been living in chronic pain for many years now and I feel like I will no longer be a prisoner of that pain. Having my left ovary removed essentially removed one of my greatest pain sources. So I haven't really been experiencng any real overall depression, and if anything, I feel more balanced hormonally. But now that I can't have sex for another 5-6 weeks or more I am starting to have some sadness and depression specifically where that topic is concerned. I hug my husband about 50 times a day, but that obviously isn't even close to the same thing. And I know that "messing around" is off limits because the nerves and muscles inside need to heal and not be contracting. I just feel like I am going to lose it if I have to wait that long to be with him again. I would love to just lay in bed and cuddle up with him, but he says that makes it even harder for him. Sex is very emotional for me and definitely not just a physical thing so it hurts my heart to wait this long. I haven't been crying at all post op, but this makes me want to cry and I feel like at some point I am going to end up having a meltdown. It's that awful feeling like when something has been taken away from you and then you crave and long for it even more!! Does anyone else miss sex so much that it is making them sad??? How do I survive this part???

I have actually not had any spotting since my second surgery. Just a tiny bit that same night while I was still in the hospital, but none since I have been home. Prior to that surgery I was bleeding really heavy and passing many clots of various sizes. After he restitched my cuff I haven't passed any more blood. I have not followed up with him yet to see what he saw and what else he did when he was in there. But I have been extremely crampy after the second surgery. He told me to come see him again in 1-2 weeks and that was 5 days ago so I hope to know more soon. Good luck to you. If you don't stop spotting soon you might call your doc to ask. I saw another doctor while I was in the hospital and he told me that there is a medication they can put on the cuff so it won't bleed anymore.

Thanks For the info. I had appointment on the 28th of Dec. And That is my 4th week. But I Guess I give him a call tomorrow. The spot Not bad I just wanna experience a 24 hour no spot u know. . And I'm glad u healing well. And Thanks again and let me know What Your Dr says OK.

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Originally Posted by CrazyDaizy99 I have actually not had any spotting since my second surgery. Just a tiny bit that same night while I was still in the hospital, but none since I have been home. Prior to that surgery I was bleeding really heavy and passing many clots of various sizes. After he restitched my cuff I haven't passed any more blood. I have not followed up with him yet to see what he saw and what else he did when he was in there. But I have been extremely crampy after the second surgery. He told me to come see him again in 1-2 weeks and that was 5 days ago so I hope to know more soon. Good luck to you. If you don't stop spotting soon you might call your doc to ask. I saw another doctor while I was in the hospital and he told me that there is a medication they can put on the cuff so it won't bleed anymore.

CrazyDaizy - I'm like you... My surgery was the 23rd, but with my 9 weeks restriction, I'm not clear til January 25th (yes, I've checked the calendar). We've been together 11 years. Not frisky, but MISSING him. I have been "helping him out" for awhile, and thankfully he likes to cuddle... But it's not the same. He and I dated for 3 years and were not intimate until we were married, so this kind of reminds me of our dating life! We've been playing games, and talking, and have a nightly ritual of watching a couple sitcoms on NetFlix before bed. We tease and play, and kiss - Knowing that NOTHING will come of it. And every day, it's "Hey! 5 weeks and 3 days until...!". I swiped his iPhone and added "the date" to his calendar, with a reminder alarm, lol....not that he'll forget. I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I understand.

my husband wants to set an actual date.poor man,we've not had a good sex life for about a year cause it was painful for me and he didnt want to cause me any pain.1st 2 weeks after surgery he was afraid i'd break he wouldnt even let me open a door or anything.he said that was the most scariest thing in his life when he saw me after surgery in the hospital bed connected to all those different wires.

CrazyDaisy
I totally understand what your feeling -- not with the extended date -- but the missing the intimacy. I find I am craving that part. I've felt a bit frisky a time or too, but mostly I just want to be that close to my hubby. I try to focus my brain elsewhere.... once I have a specific date I'm gonna start to plan a special little something something for us. We weren't intimate before we were married either, so I think I am going to plan a second honeymoon of sorts.

Thank you ladies! I am glad I am not the only one missing this! I haven't been given a date yet so it makes it somewhat abstract as to when exactly I am even looking forward to! I think if my doctor could tell me when it will be okay then I might have something more concrete to hang on to. I have been offering my services to my husband which he has gladly received, lol, but it doesn't help me at all. Just frustrates me. I have had painful sex for so many years that he is quite used to me telling him be gentle, go slow, do this like this or that like that. I am PRAYING that when this is all over I might actually be able to have pain free sex for the first time in a very long time. But in the mean time, I am thinking I might super glue him to me while he is sleeping so I can feel closer