10 days post op need some to talk to

i am 10 days post and i am feeling different i have no joy did not really get to rest much only three days have 10 an 11 years and i am feeling so torn house needs cleaning dinners laundry shopping shcool work 6 animals and hubby okay but does not understand my daungter told me today i am different now and it broke my heart one week post op 10 year old daugter double ear infections sinus infections so she was home for the last week on frida y son woke up with major neck spasms ended up at urgent care at 8:30 with him need injection of valum and had to go over 30min away to get liquid muscle relaxers to now at 10 post op have both kids sick at home tommorow is mothers day and i feel noone in my family understands how horrible i feel inside just empty and so very sore in lower abdomon doc says i do not need pain meds any more but i hurt and since i kept overies no hormone repalement so then why do i no long feel like me i want the old me back scared she is gone for ever please some one tell me i am not looseing my mind

feeling very alone no one undersatand how i feel i try and tell them but all i get back is you will be okay i have a 10 and 11 year old and 6 animals my daughter told me today that i am different now after surgery it broke my heart. Why do they not understand huby included i am still in pain and feel so sad yes i know i had surgery but i am mom and mom never gets sick everyone needs meals clean clothes lift to school and being picked up and friends have to idea what i am going through tryied tell hubby i get it will be okay but that does me no good i want me back where did the old me go some talk to me please

'YOU' is out on vacation - She will return soon.... Trust me!

I have had the moodiness because I feel a bit useless... I had to come to term that I am not being useless.. I am in fact in recovery. I have learned that my body deserves me to use "the down time" that I have for enjoying my family. Of course you are not yourself right now but dont let that get you down sweetheart.

When you feel out of sorts try to lay down and rest. If you love music dont hesitate listening to your favorite genre to help stabilize your mood.... Spraying your favorite scents, like perfume, really helps too... Febreze Clean Linen is yummy! Makes me feel like Ive done laundry.. I also put fabric softener sheets (sometimes cut in half) on the back of my fan to make the house smell pretty... Putting lotion on also helps because of the scent and also the little bit of massage you are giving you by rubbing... The BEST thing your hubby can do IS tell you its going to be okay... Please except it - because as much as you might think it doesnt help right now when 'you' come back from 'vacation' you'll be thankful for him and everything he has said and done! Hey, ask him for a massage! It will do wonders for you mind body AND spirit...

I hope some of these suggestions help!

Keep pampering yourself and keep allowing others to pamper you as well... Dont forget to let your beautiful family know how much you appreciate them and all that they do... They love you - thats why they are there for you!

They say some need 6 weeks to feel good again! Have some patience beautiful patient..... You really ARE going to be okay!! (i know you dont wanna hear it but sometimes we HAVE to listen)

~*Healing Hugs*~

	Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamfire9800 feeling very alone no one undersatand how i feel i try and tell them but all i get back is you will be okay i have a 10 and 11 year old and 6 animals my daughter told me today that i am different now after surgery it broke my heart. Why do they not understand huby included i am still in pain and feel so sad yes i know i had surgery but i am mom and mom never gets sick everyone needs meals clean clothes lift to school and being picked up and friends have to idea what i am going through tryied tell hubby i get it will be okay but that does me no good i want me back where did the old me go some talk to me please

Your family may not understand, but we do. I had my LAVH 4 weeks ago and have had a few episodes of severe mood swings. They usually start out by me noticing just how much darn housework I've been doing. I literally told my DH and oldest (15) they scored an "F" for helping me out around the house. Just today I broke down in tears while in the shower because I realized no one had cleaned the bathtub since the day before my surgery...and it was me who cleaned it then. I've been stressed today because I just started getting blackish/gray discharge (matter). I have no idea what this is and that didn't help my mood.

Your old self is still there...she's just in need of a lot of rest right now. I don't know if your kids still like coloring..if so, maybe you guys can sit and color with each other. Or watch a favorite movie of theirs and eat popcorn. Something they can enjoy doing with you that doesn't cause you to hurt. Do they like giving pedicures? They can pamper you while having fun painting your toenails all different colors.

Hope you feel better soon.

Dear DreamFire, you've come to the right place! We all understand! My husband left on an extended business trip so it's all on me to keep the household spinning. I have had mood swings, as well - I was very sad a few days ago and feeling some sense of "loss" - I am 44, and wasn't planning on having more children, but it sort of hit me that now I can't, even if I wanted to. So I totally know how you feel!

Here is thing, you need to rest and recover. It takes a few weeks. you can not be chasing kids around the house, on your feet all day, carrying laundry baskets, etc. You will be back in the hospital in no time, and then no good to anyone.

Sending you a hug!! Be good to yourself!!


19 Apr TVH, still have ovaries
44 years old

You say you still have your ovaries but they may be in shock and not fully working right yet. I have heard about that from these forums, however I don't know how long that lasts, i would imagine that it is "different " for everyone.

i hope you start feeling better soon!

It can be so tough. I agree with what everyone is saying....I feel like I have to do so much stuff around the house. I am not trying to be mean to my hubby or my kids-- bit this is a major recovery. I am actually pretty upset with the lack of help that I thought I would have. I have been using the stairs alot-- and have now decided that is not a good idea-- I still have bad pain! I'm desperate for some real household help. My stepmom offered to come over and clean my bathrooms and make some dinners to freeze.... All of this is just so overwhelming especially when you don't have the support you need. Ok now I am rambling but I feel better talking about this!

I thought the same thing about the sleeping ovaries and I asked for a hormone test and my gyn and pcp both said no!!! I have read and heard about it though. How does one get a test and how do you know is they are working?

Don't suck it up and do things you know you shouldn't - that is a ticket back to the hospital. Bless your stepmom for her offer, and take her up on it. My doctor told me to limit the stairs to down in the morning, and up in the evening, and a friend who'd had a hysterectomy told me to do them slowly backwards, which I did, and I didn't have an issue with them.
Maybe stepmom can explain things in basic terms to the family. Sometimes it's better coming from someone outside.
Hang in there, girl.

Big hugs to you. Your not alone, we are all in the same boat.

I'm almost 4 weeks post-op and my hubby and children act like nothing is wrong with me and I should be up and doing things around the house and taking care of them.

I think people don't understand we had major surgery and it takes time to heal, physically and emotionally.

I hope you feel better soon!