Sex question....

Ok, on to my next question. It's about sex.....

We have had outer course a few times (nothing oral) because to be quite honest, I wanted to see if everything worked properly. Orgasm is good, but definitely different without my uterus there to contract....

When I went for my five week check (my surgeon is on vacation this week so I was seen early) I asked about sex because I was told I'd be tighter...... I was always tight before the surgery but I also had prolapses so maybe they were causing things to be less roomy up there? LOL I can't believe I'm writing this....

Anyway, when I had my one week check the Surgeon used a speculum very gently and went up there for a peek.

I was instantly like.... "Well if I'm supposed to be tight, how did she get a speculum in there so easily?" I didn't say a word about it but definitely thought about it over the next four weeks.

When I went in last Monday, I asked her about it. She inserted two fingers and said she could do it comfortably and that it took two fingers to know that you were ok to have sex. (BUT not until the 8 week point!... she did reiterate that!)

I then asked about being tight because she said I'd be tighter. She said the work was all done on the inside and that I'd definitely be tighter but not as tight as I was before having children.

I'm still confused...... just wondering if anyone out there who is already having sex can explain this to me.... Are the vaginal walls closed in more? What is tighter?

For me, when my husband entered, he would have to be very careful because I would tear. That's what was tight for me. And that outer vaginal tissue (where the penis first enters) was always tight throughout intercourse. Now I'm worried that it won't be...

I hope this all made sense. It's hard to get this into words..

I'm not sure you would want to tear. I would think tearing would be painful. I haven't had any intercourse again yet. I don't think you would want to be too tight that the doctor cannot stick an instrument in there. I'll keep up with your post so I know what others say. It might pretain to me later. Good Luck.

When me and hubby had sex for the first time after surgery, hubby didn't notice the difference. I was tight before my surgery and still am.

Oh no. I don't want to tear. Definitely not. I'm just saying that prior to my surgery I was very tight and would tear if he got a little overzealous! LOL

But to add to that, I also did have paps, etc.. where a speculum was used. So I guess it would be the same now?

I'm not sure. I'm listening to your answers to find out too. Oh.. well I did have an exam and if that speculum thing is the silver thing they put up there I would say it was tight. You know I was thinking that after my Operative Laproscopy 9 yrs ago that when I tried to have intimate relations I was tighter. I complained about that to him that it hurt b/c it was well tight. But I phrased it differently to him. I thought it was him and not me.

I didn't feel a difference, other than my cuff being kinda sensitive. My husband didn't say that there was a difference either.

Hi Leese
We had the same surgery. I am definitely tighter at the entrance of the vagina - is that what you mean? The opening became much larger following delivery of babies and now after these repairs it is tighter. Perhaps they just mean "tighter on average" so if you were pretty tight, before surgery perhaps now you are the same or even just a bit more open.
Did you have stitches along your perineum as part of your posterior repair or was it all on the inside as you said in the original post?
J

No sutures on the perineum area. My surgeon said my rectocele was very mild and therefore all of the work that was done was on the inside.

I only had two sutures on the outside and both were on my pubic area on the left and right side of the outer vagina where the pubic hair is.

I guess I'll find out in two weeks exactly what is what. LOL I can barely stand to wait!!!! BUT I will.....I am having such an awesome recovery and I don't want anything to screw it up!

My eight week mark is our 15th Anniversary week. That's pretty exciting and special.

	Quote:
Originally Posted by Leese9731 "I only had two sutures on the outside and both were on my pubic area on the left and right side of the outer vagina where the pubic hair is

They are where the tape is anchored. I have them plus the biggest episiotomy that can fit on my body. I think that's why I notice the tightness and you do not.

My eight week mark is our 15th Anniversary week. That's pretty exciting and special.[/quote] ENjoy it!
Jx