my fear

HI , i was laid in bed last night and all could think about was the surgery, but the main thing that keeps coming into my head is dying on the op table or dying if i get post op complications. I have 2 children [boys aged12 and 14] they are the main reason for my fear, i keep imagining how distraught they would be if this happened. Im sorry, i know its very morbid to think like that, i guess its because i know i will get my op date v. soon then ill know its really gona happen.[ the op], i keep thinkin do i really need this op ,or sould i just get on with my life with the pain that i do have, cos sometimes its really not that bad. I just need to get this fear out of my head, how do i stop thinking like this TAH/BSO[no date yet] forconstant ovary and pevic pain, heavy periods ,underactive thyroid, polyps

I'm Right There With You. I Will Be Leaving My Home At 530am For Surg Today And I Have Been Awake Thinking About The Same Thing Since 130am. My Kids Are 4 And 8. This Is The Most Disturbing Part Of The Entire Process. I Wish You The Best And You Are In My Prayers. Thanks For Listening. Michelle

I have the same fear. I did work for an OB/GYN for four years, and in my mind I know that the percentage of that happening to the number of these surgeries done is very small. We only ever hear about the bad outcomes like death, but when you think of how many of these are done a day and no one dies, the chance is slim to none. My doc alone has done thousands of these surgeries and he has never had a patient die as a result. (Thank GOD). I think this is a fear we all have. I don't have any great advice to offer to get it out of your head, as it is still in the back of mine. All I can offer you is a prayer and a hug. Remeber, this is MAJOR surgery, but it is done everyday, everywhere. Maybe even ask your doctor like I did, how many has he/she done? Have you ever had a patient die? ( I don't know if the doc will tell you the truth, but hopefully).Do I have any risk factors or reasons that there might be complications? I'm sure he/she has had this talk with a thousand women in their career. Hopefully your doc can put you at ease, or make you a little less nervous anyhow. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Summer

I've shared your fear also, I think it's only human to at least think about it at some point. My kids are 9, 8, and 5. My dh would go insane if he was left by himself.. hahahah. Honestly, I think I've just come to a point to push thoughts like that out of my mind. My kids are spending the night before surgery w/ my mother as I have to be at the hospital at 5:30 in the morning. I think that is what bothers me. I'm not going to be able to say goodbye to them right before. Hugs!

I definitely think you are not alone...I have those thought too...or being put to sleep and not waking up...


I try and keep my thoughts in happy places and I have talked to my doc..and told them in the past with surgeries they give me valium(SP)....so I wont be freaky out before I go..

I will hand all this over to God and my Doctor the morning of surgery...

This is completely normal. I had all the same thoughts & fears before my surgery. You can't help having those what if feelings, and all the second guessing yourself that goes along with it. I just hoped for the best and put it in Gods hands and here I am. Made it through. Hopefully everything goes well for you all, just know your not doing anything that most of us haven't done already .

Hi Ladies,
I agree with KTrame I had the same fears. I sat down with my dh and told him with tears in my eyes that I was worried & scared.
dh reasured (sp?) me that I would be fine. I told him that if anything happened to me to take extra good care of our 15 yr old son. (Tears are flowing from my eyes).
I did not want my ds to worry about my fear so I did not tell him.
As women we do have the fear. I remember when my dh went in for neck surgery I had the fear for him.
I guress we will never change that is why we are so caring.
Take care and keep us posted
Thoughts and Prayers are with you
Lori

I was tortured with the same thoughts. I mother passed away when I was 13. All I could think about was that I was leaving my kids just like my mother left me. But here I am 2 weeks post op today and I made it!
I hope your surgery is scheduled sooner than later. I had 5 weeks to comtemplate my surgery. It was way too long.

Your thoughts are normal. Spending time on hystersisters will help. It helped me alot just to reading that others are stressing also.

Hang in there. It is worth it all on the other side to be rid of all the pain, bleeding, etc. etc.
The anxiety and stress before surgery was way worse then the recovery for me.

I can't believe that my surgery is over and 2 weeks has gone by already. We all know how fast time flies. Before you know it you will be on this side recovering!

When negative thoughts would race through my mind, I would force my mind to think of positive thoughts.



Bessiejo TAH/BSO vertical incision for melon size fibroid and very large uterus.

The waiting is truly the worst part of this whole ordeal. I remember the very same fears not only with my hysterectomy but even when I had a D&C a year ago! It's such a scary thing to have someone have your life in their hands. One thing I did to help with my fears was to writed down a list of how I wanted to feel after surgery. It made me so focused on those goals that it made it harder for me to dwell on the complications. One other thing, I found that reading all the posts with complications put that in my mind and I was a nervous nelly in the castle, every twinge I expected to be something horrid. For me, the mind games were far worse than the reality. GOOD LUCK you'll do fine!

Thank you for all your comments, my partner had major open heart surgery[hes only 40] 4 months ago and i remember thinking the worst, but thankfully he is ok and back at work. The first time i knew he was ok i remember thinking = if he can survive such a major op like that then surely i will make it through this =, i thought positive for a while but then all the negative thoughts started creeping back in, so i will try again my very best to start thinking positive. THANKS X