Utter frustration

I needed to vent and wasn't real sure where else to go... I've got PMS like I've never had before and I'm miserable! I have never felt this awful before in my life. I'm angry, unmotivated to do anything but hate sitting doing nothing, grouchy, depressed, shaky, my brain is going a million miles an hour, I'm practically in tears all the time, etc. I ended up leaving work because I couldn't focus on anything. Now I'm stressing because I'm missing so much work with my adeno between the cramps and the PMS. I want to take a leave of absence or something so I can focus on taking care of myself and get this over with before they just up and fire me, but we can't afford for me to stay home without some sort of pay. And I love my job so don't want to do anything else to jeopardize it. I'm hoping that maybe I can get on disability or something. I'm so tired of being in pain, depressed, being tired, the PMS, the mood swings, everything... My poor DH doesn't know what to do to help me and although he's being sweet, he's starting to get on my nerves with trying to help. Its not fair to put he and our 2 boys through this. I hate being the wicked witch or in pain all the time. I don't know what else to do...... I HATE FEELING LIKE THIS!!!!!
I'm sorry for ranting, but thank you for listening.

Hi There!

I'm sorry to hear that you are suffering so terribly. From reading some of your past posts, I understand that you are considering having a hysterectomy as a means to end your gynelogical issues. Whatever you decide to do, I hope it results in getting started on the road to better health. You deserve to be the best "you" that you can be!

Manys

I'M SO SORRY THAT YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO DEAL WITH.

BUT YOUR NOT ALONE. I HAVE BEEN A NERVOUS WRECK!
DEPRESSED, CRING, ANGRY & I CAN'T EVEN STAND MYSELF!
NOT SLEEPING, I GO THROUGH TIMES WHERE I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO ANYONE, I DON'T EVEN ANSWER THE PHONE.

I DON'T LIKE DOING THIS TO MY FAMILY EITHER, I FEEL SO FRUSTRATED WITH MY SELF. I FIND MYSELF PICKING AT THE SMALLEST LITTLE THINGS THEY DO.

THIS IS NOT ME, WHERE DID I GO.
I WAS ALWAYS SO OUT GOING.

I THINK AFTER A WHILE, ITS JUST SIMPLY GETS TO THE POINT , THAT ALL THE PAIN, HORMONES,BLEEDING ETC., TAKES ITS TOLL.

I FOUND SO MUCH COMFORT TALKING TO THE LADIES HERE.
THESE BOARDS HAVE BEEN A BIG HELP TO ME MENTALLY!

I HAVE FOUND AT TIMES, IF I CAN JUST GET AWAY, BY MYSELF,
EVEN JUST FOR 15 MIN., IT HELPS SOME.

GOOD LUCK AND BEST WISHES,I'LL KEEP, YOU IN MY PRAYERS,
AND REMEMBER ME IN YOURS ,I'LL BE HAVING SURGERY ON FEB.2ND. MISSY

Hang in there and make sure you've got a good connection with your Dr. I have been going through some of the same things for years now, but hadn't stopped long enough to try to figure out what was going on. Had one of those lightning strikes moments when my mom was in the hospital this past June telling the Dr's that the pain was "not too bad", she didn't have time for it, didn't want to be a burden, etc...I called my Dr that day and had an ultrasound the next day. I am going ahead with what ever it takes to get my life back (going in 2/8). I've had too many evenings this past year in tears telling my DH that I was short with one or both of our girls (soon to be 2 and 5) for no good reason, not enjoying our sex life (something I miss terribly), and being in constant, chronic pain. This has affected my quality of life!!
My DH made a great point when he said if it was anything else that was hurting me and causing me to compromise my days, we would have had it out years ago...he's right. Women are NOT their reproductive systems.
May you find relief, peace and happiness with your decision, whatever it may be.

Thanks ladies for your support, hugs and shoulders to cry on. I was a zombie with depression yesterday and today doesn't look much better. All I want to do is curl back up in bed and hide from all of this for a bit. I tried to call my Dr yesterday and still haven't heard back from him. I think I'm going to talk to my Boss in the next couple of days to see about working from home temporarily until I can get back on my feet or have surgery. I've decided to go ahead with the hysterectomy. I'm tired of going through this and although my Dr is recommending trying the Novasure procedure first, I don't want to try something that only promises a slight hope of some relief from my symptoms. I would rather get it all taken care of at once and be done with it.
These boards and site have been a God send and I can't thank you enough for being here.
I hope you all have a wonderful day!
Jen