still afraid.

Hi, I read this forum nearly everyday. I am 5 weeks and 2 days away from the big day. Last week I was having my heavy painful period for 8 days. When that is going on I can't wait for the surgery. Today, however, I am beginning my week of optimum feeling good and again I am thinking I don't need the surgery, I'm to scared, I don't want all that pain and post op healing. I have put this off for over 5 years already, secretly hoping that the bleeding would get so bad I'd need an emergency hysterectomy, then I wouldn't have to deal with the anxiety. This web site does help, but we still seem to get fearful. My next wish is that the Dr. would phone and say "come tomorrow, we have a cancellation and you are next".
sapphira

sapphira -

I truly believe the anxiety that I felt prior to my surgery was the hardest part. I'm not just saying that to make you feel better. It was so hard! I kept having the surgery every night in my dreams then I'd wake up in the morning feeling exhausted. When I finally had the surgery done what a relief it was!!!!! I'll be 3 weeks post op tomorrow and already I feel sooooo much better than I did prior to my surgery. & hang in there my dear & try to focus on how much better your going to feel soon.

"everyone" says I'll feel so much better, that they felt/feel so much better. Can someone describe what this so much better actually feels like? Could someone tell me what the anesthetic/waking up process feels like and how to they know how much to give you?
sapphira

Sapphira,

The going to sleep and waking up part.......It's the best part! I was soooo out of it from the anesthesia, followed by 12 hours of the Morphine pump, that I don't even know if I was really in pain!

After they took the Morphine away and gave me Vicodan and ibuprophen in it's place, I never felt anything more than discomfort. 1 week post-op, I no longer needed anything but good old fashioned ibuprophen.

I can honestly say that pain was not an issue, post-op. Compared to the almost unbearable pain that my periods brought.......The surgery discomfort is nothing in comparison!

My issues have been insomnia, some swelling of the legs and boredom during recovery.

How does the surgery make you feel better? Well, right off the bat.....No more feeling like I'm in labor whenever I was bleeding. And the heavy bleeding? I haven't shed a drop since before surgery. I also don't have to plan my life around my period.

I'm 11 weeks post-op and I truly feel like I have a new lease on life! I'm healing nicely, feel great and am back to doing things I haven't done in ages!

I can honestly tell you that it is so worth it.

Take care and try to stay positive. Attitude really is everything!

's

Jennifer

Sapphira, the anasthesiologist (I know that is spelt way wrong, can't seem to get my brain to work today) knows what to do, I think that it goes by wait, I don't remember the recovery room at all, I just remember walking up and DH was sitting at my bed side in my room. (He told me later I was singing my fool head off all the way to the room!)

There is pain, yes the first 8 hours for me were horrid, I had a morphine pump and I just kept pressing that little button until I felt nothing. If you are worried about throwing up with morphine (it can happen) ask them to give you gravol with it as well. Next day they took out my cathater and DH and I practiced walking the halls!

I had pain, I still do, but I would have had my period this week, and it is soo wonderful knowing that I can go and weed my garden for an hour without having to run into the house to change pads/tampons and clothes. (If I could even get out of bed). Knowing that I will have control over my life instead of my uterus controling my every move is a wonderful feeling. Just think, you will be able to buy white sheets, white pants, sexy fun underwear (not the old granny "period" type!). I don't have the feeling that I'm drowning, I feel like once I'm healed I'll have so much freedom.

I don't know if this helped, you may not feel the pain I felt after surgery, as we are all different and handle pain differently. Don't worry about the surgery, it will all go smoothly, and just think, you won't have to go outside when it's -40 in good old Saskatchewan!!!

sapphira -

As far as the anesthesia meds are concerned...you are weighed the day of your surgery & then asked your height. There is a mathematical formula that the anesthesialologist uses to calculate the exact amount of meds that you need for your surgery. He/she will be with you the entire time monitoring your vitals & ensuring that everything goes smoothly.

I've only been under anesthesia 2 times...the first was an emergency situation & the second was for my TVH. With the first surgery, I wasn't given anything prior to going into the operating room so I remember everything very clearly. In the OR the doc placed a mask over my face...& told me to take a few deep breaths. Then I don't remember a thing until waking up in the recovery room. With my TVH, I was given versed prior to being wheeled into the OR & I only have vague recollections of even being in that room. Upon waking, I felt very sleepy/groggy & had no concept of how much time had passed.

As far as feeling so much better goes, for me I was in alot of pain prior to my surgery. It was CONSTANTLY there with me. I no longer have that pain & am almost pain free...just depends on what I do & if I move too quickly or something like that. So for me that is a HUGE improvement!!! Obviously, I didn't feel this good immediately post-op BUT I did feel like this huge burdon had been lifted from my shoulders & relief that it was finally over with.

I hope this info helps you & good luck to you!

Sapphira,
The waiting is truly the hardest part. My experience was pretty much exactly like Jenn's (with the exceptions that I had Demerol instead of Morphine and I do not have any leg swelling). My anestheologist was great ~ he put something into my IV before the surgery to be sure that I didn't have any problems with nausea when I woke up. I don't know what the name of the drug is (I think it is relatively new) but talk to your anestheologist about this if you are worried about it. When I woke up in recovery it just felt like I had been asleep on my couch! I COULDN'T BELIEVE I HAD ALREADY HAD THE SURGERY! THEY REALLY HAD TO CONVINCE ME! The only problem that I had, and I mean ONLY is that I was not able to tolerate Demerol this time around (I have always been able to take it in the past). When I pushed the pain button connected to my IV it made my blood pressure drop. I tried three times and each time they were great about getting it back up in a hurry. I was so relieved and I never got sick. This was a blessing in disguise because they switched me over to oral pain meds that afternoon and I was even able to eat dinner that night. Today is my one week anniversary and I know that I have a LONG way to go, but honestly, I woke up feeling so much better than before surgery, and I just feel better and better and stronger and stronger each day. I have to remind myself to take it easy and that I DO have internal incisions, so I had better not push the envelope. I hope that this helps you.

Just remember that everyone is different and comes this surgery from a different place, so they will have different recoveries. Our health situation and our attitudes both contribute to our recovery equations. Please feel free to PM me if you want to talk. Good luck to you.

Sapphira,
I feel just like you! My surgery is a week before yours and I too wish my doc would call and just say come on in. I'm hoping to remember how I am feeling today, -need to stay near a bathroom superplus tampon and pad- when I go in for my surgery. The pain is not so much the issue for me as is the potential lack of dignity. My husb will be with me on operation day and my sister with me the 2nd day. Their job is to make sure I do not have any visitors that I don't want with me. Take care, sporty1

Dear ((Saphira))

It is normal to be afraid & there have been times when I have phoned the hospital & also asked for any cancellation. I will possibly still be afraid if they are able to give me one? Belive me - you dont want an Emergency-Hysterectomy? It is much easier to go in to hospital & to be prepared. Panic would possibly make this a more frightening & scary experience for you. YOU, are NOT alone - I am scared too and often wish there were easier ways of having this surgery. Please take care and know that others are thinking about you & are praying for you too & donna42