Nervous about appointment

Hey everyone.

I just wanted to write something to vent a bit.
I have an appoint for friday the 10th to talk to my Dr. about having a hysterectomy. I'm very nervous because I'm afraid she'll say she won't do it. When i made the appoint, I planed on talking about getting my tubes tied, and since then me, and my husband, decided that a hysterectomy would be best to fit my situation.

Just a little background on me, and maybe you guys could give me your opinion?

I'm 27 and have endometriosis and am in constant pain. I'm on continuous birth control (nuva ring) and it does seem to help. But I suppose the biggest and most important reason i feel I feel i need a hysterectomy is because I am bipolar and and can never have a child. I refuse to go off my medication and I would never be pregnant on my meds. I do not want to put anyone through what I went through. I can not go off my meds because I have past suicide attempts before being medicated and also self harm. It would be an unpredictable situation. Even being on birth control, I have this phobia of becoming pregnant. It really puts a strain om mine and my husbands relation (well that and horrible pain I have during sex)

I apologize for the lengthy post, I just wanted someone's opinion on this. I have discussed my decision for a hysterectomy with my psychologist and psychiatrist and they both agree that I have good reasoning. My husband is also very supportive.

Like I said, I'm afraid my gynecologist will refused to do this because of one reason or another.

Again, sorry for the long post. Thanks for reading.

RiverLotus

Do you have a friend whom you trust who could refer you to their gynecologist? Perhaps a second opinion would be in order. I had to go to a second doctor before I could find someone who would understand my special situation (and not just throw a bunch of pills at me, which I cannot take), and now, today, I am going to see her and get things started to have a hysterectomy. I've been her patient now for 3 years, and she has been amazing.

It seems if your medical team (your psychologist and psychiatrist) agree, and your husband is supportive, there has to be a considerate, kind doctor who will listen to you and agree with your decision to have a hysterectomy.

It sounds like you really have thought this through and have medical support. Don't stop looking for a doctor who will listen to you and be supportive in your decision.

I do think she will understand. It's just that i want this so bad, my fear and anxiety is getting in the way.

I haven't really discussed this with anyone outside of the medical circle because every time I brought it up, people would say "oh you're so young. Just tie your tubes if you don't want kids" and some people have said "take your time and really think about it.you're so young, you might change your mind about kids" so I just don't talk about it.

If my Dr. turns me down, I'll start a new search. I'm very persistent.

I understand the fear and anxiety. I want to go through surgery as well, but I've never had surgery or general anesthesia, and as silly as it sounds, I am scared out of my wits...but that doesn't mean I'm not going to do everything I can to get through this and come out on the other side with a better quality of life. So I applaud you for your persistence

It is annoying though for people to be so opinionated about OUR bodies. I get the same thing from people who know I have lupus and fibromyalgia. They're always telling me to change my diet, get more exercise, or they say 'everyone is tired these days'. It does get old, doesn't it. I often wish I could change places with those people and let them see what it's like to be me for a day, and then they wouldn't make those comments, I'll bet!

I do hope your doctor will work with you. I'm keeping good thoughts for you!

I think with a well reasoned discussion, support from your psychiatrist, and your husband, your gyn will likely be supportive too. If not, then of course find another doctor. But keep in mind that you may have to convince your insurance company to cover it at your age as well. Hard to imagine but I have a friend who had to fight for a hysterectomy in her 20's, not just with doctors but ins co for payment.

I wish you well, dear and pray it goes well.

Thanks for the support guys. I thought about the insurance part of it. That's another thing i'm stressing about. I'm getting too tired to fight, but i'll go ninja if i have too lol

Appointment is tomorrow so hopefully we get get the ball rolling in the right direct.

Dariahna: I applaud you for pushing through your fears and anxiety. You'll come out stronger knowing you kick fear's ***. Plus, if you tell your doc its your first surgery and you're freaked out, they can give you a wonderful cocktail to calm you. I'm terrified of ivs, (which people think is odd because i'm pierced and heavily tattooed teehee) so they gas me before they do it. Like you said, push though for a better quality of life.

Thanks again guys

Thanks RiverLotus, that's totally sweet...I am hoping that things go well for you too! We all deserve the best care and that's what I'm working for. My appointment with my doctor went really well yesterday, and I am feeling a lot better...it might be different once I'm laying on that pre-op table (lol), but I have a plan. I'm going to be thinking about the things that I'm going to do once I've gone through recovery - like buying my first pair of white pants that I can wear with confidence, knowing I won't bleed through them! And maybe going to a fancy restaurant with my husband, and having a nice, leisurely dinner, knowing I don't have to hurry through for fear of having cramps and pain in the middle of the meal. Those kinds of things will help too!

Also, my son's girlfriend's mom is a surgical nurse, and she gave me a lot of very good information regarding pre-op, surgery, and post-op. My husband also works with a trauma nurse, and he even called and spoke to me, so I'm getting a lot of good information and a lot of support.

I do thank everyone here on the board for being supportive too...I'm hoping to come back once I leave 'the castle' and give an awesome detailed report that will help someone else :-)

I'll know my surgery date tomorrow...

Just an update...surgery was scheduled for AUG 29 because my doctor is in such demand for surgery! Yikes! Now it's been moved to next week (5/30)!!! I went in for a follow up biopsy today since I hadn't had one in a year. I go in for an ultrasound tomorrow. I had to laugh...the assistant told me about the surgery and 'then' took my blood pressure...of course it was high...

But the visit was good...doctor says that she's using propofol, and will do everything while I'm asleep (put the catheter in, etc.)...she says everything will be taken out before I wake up, and I will only have an IV once I'm in recovery. Surgery will be about 90 minutes...we're taking everything but the cervix.

She's going to let me start out with ibuprofen and prescribe something stronger if I need it. She says I will have surgical glue instead of staples or stitches...

So it all sounds good...but of course nerves are getting the best of me, and I'm a little off from the biopsy...it was no big deal...my doctor is awesome...but I'm bleeding and cramping so I feel kind of lousy...but I'm sure I'll feel better soon...

For those of you who are willing, please keep me in your prayers...

I'll probably post again before I head to the castle, but I will post afterwards for sure...

I feel good about what I'm hearing from my doctor, and I'm trying to keep positive thoughts...

Blessings on all my sisters here!!

PS to previous post (can't edit my original post for some reason)...

My endo biopsy was easy...just a few pinches....but I'm still cramping and bleeding...

Anyone have post-biopsy bleeding that lasted more than a few days???

My ultrasound should be interesting if I'm still bleeding...

Any thoughts?