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Having a hard time making peace with surgery
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07-09-2013, 05:23 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 54
Hysterectomy: July 17th, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Undecided
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Having a hard time making peace with surgery
I am scheduled for a DvH next week with removal of at least one ovary. I have a 9cm cyst on my left ovary, numerous fibroids, and a 3cm cyst on my right ovary. I had a myomectomy in 2010 after bleeding so heavily I needed blood transfusions. Next thing I knew I was full of fibroids again. My doctor is encouraging me to think of this as an end to years of ongoing issues. But I'm having a hard time thinking my issues now are worse than the possibility of surgery recovery and immediate menopause.
Plus, I don't have pain. I can feel the mass in my pelvis, and sometimes I'm tender, but I don't have pain in the way that so many women on this forum do. My periods are heavy, but the flow lasts less than two days. I have little or no cramping. I'm not saying there are no consequences to having a gigantic cyst in your belly. I'm careful about physical activity and worried about sex. But I didn't think I'd have surgery unless I'd reached a place where the physical symptoms were unbearable. They're not.
I know it's normal to freak out before surgery. It's helpful to read that other women do. And I know that I need to do something about this cyst to be sure it's not cancer and to keep it from rupturing and ending up in the ER. But I can't stop wondering if I really need all of this surgery.
Were other people second guessing all the way to the ER? And were other people having surgery without having serious symptoms? For the record, I'm 45 and otherwise super-duper healthy. Thanks, sisters.
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07-09-2013, 07:05 AM
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Posts: 11,663
Hysterectomy: November 24th, 2008
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: Having a hard time making peace with surgery
sukhamukha -
I had cancer and was hoping to find a way not to have surgery, so yes this is something that is normal. I had no pain, a regular period with some very, very heavy flow days. So the cancer being found in D&C was not what I was expecting.
That being said if you are not comfortable with the decision to have surgery now may not be the right time. You have to be in a good emotional place with all of this. If you aren't the pyschological side may be much moree intense post surgery. Not to mention if you experience a complication you may blame yourself for not delaying the surgery.
Definitely talk things over with your Dr and get a second opinion on things so you can find some peace.
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07-09-2013, 09:19 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 21
Hysterectomy: July 1st, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: Having a hard time making peace with surgery
Hi Sukhamukha,
I work in the medical field and I do not believe a Doctor would recomend a hysterectomy if you do not needed. Remember you want to take care of things that are not normal in your body as soon as possible because you never know. I know it is very differcult to make this decision but I just had a total hysterectomy with ovaries for complex hyperplasia with atypia and I had to make the decision within weeks for surgery and now I know I made the right decision everyhing is Negative!! I know you are scarred do not be just go on and everthing will be alright!!
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07-09-2013, 10:08 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 844
Hysterectomy: July 31st, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: Having a hard time making peace with surgery
I've had horrible periods my whole life, I've wanted a hysterectomy since my youngest was born 7 years ago. Even now that I have mine scheduled and am completely on board with it I have almost canceled it a dozen times in the last month! I think it's normal to feel this way. It's a major surgery.
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07-09-2013, 10:36 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 12
Hysterectomy: July 12th, 2013
Surgery Type: TLH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Having a hard time making peace with surgery
I am glad to see that it is normal to think that I may be overreacting my having a hysto. I keep thinking, did I over exaggerate? Is it really that bad? But then the pain meds where off, and the pain is there again letting me know that something is not right.
I am so glad to have found this place so that we can all see that our emotions are normal.
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07-09-2013, 05:26 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 66
Hysterectomy: July 24th, 2013
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Having a hard time making peace with surgery
I'm having a TAH in 2 weeks, and been having second thoughts too. I've hemoraged 3 times and had 2 blood transfusions in the last six months. 3 months ago I had a bunch of polyps removed. But for the last few weeks I seem to be doing better, hardly any symptoms, even pain seems to be gone. I'm still determined to have the surgery, but every once in a while I wonder if I really need to do this.
Second thoughts are normal, especially if you're feeling better. But you don't want this hanging over your head, having the surgery, you won't have the cysts or the fibroids causing you any more trouble.
Good luck with next week, I'll be thinking of you. Don't worry, you'll be fine
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07-09-2013, 06:12 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 155
Hysterectomy: August 7th, 2013
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Having a hard time making peace with surgery
I'm having similar thoughts, and the closer my date gets (August 7), the more and stronger these thoughts are.
I too had been super healthy. I've told friends part of my difficulty with accepting the fact that I'm going to have a hysterctomy is I feel like I've been beamed up...or strangely transported...from super healthy to--boom--hysterectomy. Couldn't I have SLID to this place slowly??! Or at least WALKED there?!
I'm 55. After going for a routine, annual appointment, I ended up--many appointments and tests later--with a diagnosis of complex hyperplasia without atypia. I realize that younger people with that diagnosis frequently take one of two routes. They see if it regresses on its own or they take progestin and get re-biopsied (and sonogrammed?) every three months. I'm already ON progestin and have been for a few years now (hormone replacement therapy for bad menopause symptoms). I can't imagine what dose of that I'd have to take if I'm already taking it! And it creeps me out that I'm already on the drug that docs use to make the condition go away. If I got the condition while I'm on the curative drug, well, yikes.
Back to the symptoms: other than some lengthy "periods" or spotting at unpredictable times, I have no symptoms. I have no pain. My bleeding isn't heavy (I went through that in my late 40s, so I do know how scary and inconvenient THAT is).
After thinking through thoughts like "but I'm healthy--or was," "but I feel fine," or "is my health really THAT compromised," I also acknowledge these thoughts: I have what healthcare professionals call AUB--abnormal uterine bleeding--and that's not a good thing, especially at my age (55). I am already on a drug that is used to make the thing I have go away. Why at 55 do I want to try to preserve a uterus that is acting up with AUB?
And then I think, "Hey. If it's doing this at 55, do you think it WON'T be doing it at 56, 60, 65?" I am in great shape physically now, so maybe it's the right time for this.
I feel for you: it's a tough "dilemma" when you feel so healthy otherwise or have always enjoyed great health.
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