how do you tell him you can't have children

I'm 35 and just had a hysterectomy on the 16th of March. I'm not dating anyone right now, but one thing I've been reflecting on is how and when and if to tell someone I'm dating in the future that I can't have children. I still would like a family. I personally don't mind the idea of adoption at all. I think it would be a wonderful gift to give a child a second chance. I know it shouldn't be a big deal, but some men really want their own biological children. Do I say hi I'm so and so and by the way?... Or now that we're in love I have something really awful to tell you... or just mention it causally in 2012 I went to Holland for two weeks and then there was that thing with the hysterectomy....???

I've been thinking about that too!

I guess it's not something I'd bring up on a first date but I do think it's important to be open from early on, especially if it looks like a relationship is going to develop. If the guy has problems accepting that you can't have children then it's better to know quickly rather than both of you wasting your time. Easier said than done, I know, but I'm the pragmatic type!
I'd still like to have a family too, one way or another, and it could be interesting to explore other options with a future partner. I guess you just have to approach it in a positive way!

Best wishes,

Christina

I am single too but already have kids. Also 35 though. I think I have been so set that I wouldn't have anymore kids that I haven't thought about that conversation much. It is a part of who I am and part of getting to know one another in the beginning. Talking about goals and dreams, sharing who you are... The right time will come to say it.

I think the way you put it. You need to learn to be comfortable with who you are now. Think positive thoughts and dreams about what you want out of life now. No you can't have kids now but you would love to meet someone who has kids? Or you want to meet someone and try to adopt? Is using a serregote an option, etc?

Whatever you decide, don't let it make you feel incomplete. The right man will work with you and who you are just as you are, ya know?

I hope I have shed some light on the issue. Take care!