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More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...) More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

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  #1  
Unread 06-16-2004, 04:25 PM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

Just finished advising my pupils' parents of my change of operation date, one mother I've got to know fairly well over the decade I've taught her offspring asked me outright what if I wanted a baby!! (a) it's none of her business and (b) I do realise the consequences of having my uterus removed!!

It's MY body and I'll make my own choices for it (under the proper advice!)

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  #2  
Unread 06-16-2004, 05:39 PM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

Some people just don't think, do they?

Sorry that happened to you

  #3  
Unread 06-16-2004, 05:43 PM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

That is terrible. Sometimes I really wonder what people are thinking when they run their mouths. I am glad that everyone I have told has been supportive, even my boss, although being as it is a "female problem" he just said he understood and then bolted out of my office. It was actually pretty funny.

But it is your body and you should be able to do what is best for you. Sorry you had to deal with someone so callous.
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  #4  
Unread 06-17-2004, 06:47 AM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

s

I think that some people just don't think before they speak. I had a very good friend say something that made me cry for days before my own surgery. She had thought that she was being funny.

Hang in there sweetie, your wait is almost over.

s
  #5  
Unread 06-17-2004, 07:55 AM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

VENT on my Sister!!! When I told people that I was going to have the procedure, their first reponse was that I already had one child and that was good enough. Well, if I had 1, 15, or 115 babies, it is none of their business and not their responsibility. They didn't even ask if it was for health reasons! How insensitive!! Well, people will be people. I just change my way of dealing with the ignorant ones! I just don't deal with them on a personal level, at all.

I was not having a good day on yesterday and when I told my boss she told me to suck it up. Well, today she is out of the office sick. Should I call her at home and tell her to suck it up. Did I mention that my boss also happens to be a dear friend of mine! That is what bothers me the most. I don't think she has any empathy! Oh well, I will survive!


Keep venting....it works!
  #6  
Unread 06-17-2004, 09:10 AM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

Someone I concidered a friend said to me yesterday when I was trying to talk to her about my fears of dying during the surgery..

'Well that surgery is really no big deal'.... I know she was just trying to make light of it, so that I wouldn't feel scared... but how insensitive... ignorant.... etc. etc... I could go on all day...

I just want this over with.....
  #7  
Unread 06-17-2004, 09:18 AM
reply to vent

Of course you are aware of the consequences of losing your uterus. Some people are so ignorant of your feelings.
  #8  
Unread 06-17-2004, 09:47 AM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

sister Just let your head and your heart lead you on ...I had a similar instance just days ago and posted my frustration as well.. all the response i re'cvd from this board made me 10 ft tall and bullet proof.........God help the next one to" poor thing me.".....
  #9  
Unread 06-17-2004, 10:55 AM
More insensitivity........(I'm having a vent here...)

Isn't it interesting how people believe they have the right to comment on something so intensely personal as some casual acquaintance's reproductive health? We clothe those parts of our body because they are PRIVATE - and yet, let a pregnant woman walk in the grocery store and complete strangers will start asking things like "when are you due?" (Why do you want to know - are you volunteering to be a godparent?).

I've experienced this with my own employment - we are a small company of less than 200 employees - most of which are in other parts of the country from me and wouldn't know me to trip over me in person. However, somehow they ALL know I had a hysterectomy, and I know I didn't tell them. I'm in New Mexico - if I have reason to talk to a man in Idaho about business matters, do I need him asking me if I have to have HRT? How embarassing! Now I don't want to ever go to another Company Christmas Party or Summer Company Picnic at Headquarters - because I feel like everyone will be looking at me behind my back and saying snotty things about whether or not I appear to have lost enough weight, etc., etc.

One gal who works in a different division but still in New Mexcio - I had to call her about company business last week. She was some kind of nasty to me on the phone because she didn't feel that I should have access to her cell phone number and demanded to know who gave it to me. Well, it was her boss back at home office that told me to call her directly rather than have him play messenger. I explained that to her, and she calmed down a bit. Within 2 minutes, before our call was over, she made a comment about my hysterectomy - so I turned the tables on her and said "Now, that's truly personal info and I'd like to know just who took it upon themselves to violate my right to privacy and share that with you!" She refused to answer, and hung up.

Some of us may not realize that we've been subjected to the same kind of insensitive comments as you have, debra. Chances are though, that sooner or later someone will say something stupid to each and every one of us. My philosophy is that the people that are close enough to care about, I try to re-educate. The others, I try really hard to laugh off if I can, because I figure there's no point allowing them to continue to violate me by letting myself stew over them.

to all of us that have been disrespected.
  #10  
Unread 06-17-2004, 11:30 AM
Understand

I totaly understand how you feel. My Daughters stepmom says "Wow, you do know that is permanent?" "Really" I said. She is a smart one. The she says "Wow but I thought you wanted more children" I then replied "That would be nice, but obviously not in the plan". Then she says "but you are soooooo lucky not to have a period any more. I bet you are happy!" She truly is one of the most annoying people out there. She is really clueless. She wanted to know why I would stay in the hospital for a few days after her children she went home right away. I felt like saying good for you. But refrained. Well I guess Im done venting now to.

Some people don't consider other peoples feelings!

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