No Date: Does anyone have good sex after hysterectomy

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Originally Posted by Lily7435 That must have been really scary for you. I went through a scare 8 years ago waiting for results was the longest week ever, but everything was fine thankfully. I had an MRI a while back that was fine also. I just read an article from HERS whatever that is and it scared me enough to know for me the best decision is to wait or do another procedure to remove the larger and sub mucosal fibroid. if I just go back to 7-10 day periods with heavy bleeding and cramping for 3 of those days and no more gushing of blood, I can live with this more than loss of sexuality if that would happen to me. I like to think positive but have always been taught to prepare for the worst.

You might want to have a look at the Treatment Alternatives to Hysterectomy section on this site for articles and discussion re: other means of treating fibroids.

As for periods with heavy cramping and bleeding, I lived with those for more than a decade simply because I didn't know there were any alternatives. According to what I heard from friends and co-workers, that's simply what happens to women like me who've never had children. I avoided using tampons because they made the cramps worse and went through lots of ibuprofen and lots of heavy-duty pads instead. It was neither fun nor fatal. *shrug*

If you're having heavy periods on a regular basis, keep an eye on your iron and B12 levels. I became anemic at one point. Ferrous sulfate and B12 supplements were the answer.

Lily, I'm so glad you brought this up, and I wish there was a "good sex after" section here too!

Note: I'm only 5 weeks out, so haven't had sex yet, so I don't have the answer....yet.

But, I definitely have feeling down there, and I've had several "external" orgasms while in the healing process. I'm accustomed to those internal, earth-shaking ones, so I'll see how that is.

Like you, I did a ton of research on sex after. I read the millions of pages here about dysfunction, and I, too, read the HERS website (which is a major scare tactic site, so I've learned to stay away).

Took me 5 doctors (over several years) to finally get a proper diagnosis, and to finally get one to speak to me as an adult. The 4th, who had been my dr. for many years, told me my sex questions were unfounded, as I'd still have my clitoris. She was appalled that I'd even be asking at my age (53). Informed me that after 50, my libido had slowed down and I shouldn't even be having these desires. Asked about uterine contractions, and she said there is no such thing. Um, hello, new opinion please. Oh, this is one of the "best" in my very large city.

The 5th doctor (who did my surgery) is a urogyn, and he's also certified in women's sexual health. He has built his practice on these issues. When I asked him, we ended up with a very frank and honest discussion. He said that if I have uterine contractions, those obviously wouldn't be present. I told him mine are definitely g-spot related, and he assured me my g-spot wouldn't be altered, as he was leaving my cervix so there would be no nerve disruption there. But it was a decision I had to make, as my uterus had to come out (adenomyosis, tons of pain & blood).

So when you tell people you're having a hysterectomy, they seem to come out of the woodwork and want to talk to you. So I got into some very frank discussions with several women, and some of the husbands, about the sex:
1) (1 year post, Cervix & uterus taken, ovaries left): Husband said "Sex is way better than before". Wife said husband says sex is better because we're having it now. Orgasm is much weaker, if at all possible. Takes much longer.
2) (2 years post, cervix & uterus taken, ovaries left): Wife says "Sex is the same" (did not elaborate). Husband says: "Vagina is shorter, penis won't fit all the way". Wife says "Don't care about whether he fits all the way, I'm not in pain anymore....lol"
3) (7 years post, cervix & uterus taken, ovaries left): Orgasm takes much longer, is weaker. Definitely had uterine contractions, obviously missing those.
4) (10 years post, total, including ovaries, taken): Sex is so much better. Took several years, and lots of hormone therapy. (BTW, this woman looks amazing too).

What makes me so mad is the lack of information out there. The ONLY medical professional even WILLING to talk to me was the 5th doctor, who spent quite a bit of time on the anatomy of the female orgasm. I cannot believe if this were about men, they'd be told "yeah, you'll be fine".

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Originally Posted by Summer2015 Lily, I'm so glad you brought this up, and I wish there was a "good sex after" section here too! Note: I'm only 5 weeks out, so haven't had sex yet, so I don't have the answer....yet. But, I definitely have feeling down there, and I've had several "external" orgasms while in the healing process. I'm accustomed to those internal, earth-shaking ones, so I'll see how that is. Like you, I did a ton of research on sex after. I read the millions of pages here about dysfunction, and I, too, read the HERS website (which is a major scare tactic site, so I've learned to stay away). Took me 5 doctors (over several years) to finally get a proper diagnosis, and to finally get one to speak to me as an adult. The 4th, who had been my dr. for many years, told me my sex questions were unfounded, as I'd still have my clitoris. She was appalled that I'd even be asking at my age (53). Informed me that after 50, my libido had slowed down and I shouldn't even be having these desires. Asked about uterine contractions, and she said there is no such thing. Um, hello, new opinion please. Oh, this is one of the "best" in my very large city. The 5th doctor (who did my surgery) is a urogyn, and he's also certified in women's sexual health. He has built his practice on these issues. When I asked him, we ended up with a very frank and honest discussion. He said that if I have uterine contractions, those obviously wouldn't be present. I told him mine are definitely g-spot related, and he assured me my g-spot wouldn't be altered, as he was leaving my cervix so there would be no nerve disruption there. But it was a decision I had to make, as my uterus had to come out (adenomyosis, tons of pain & blood). So when you tell people you're having a hysterectomy, they seem to come out of the woodwork and want to talk to you. So I got into some very frank discussions with several women, and some of the husbands, about the sex: 1) (1 year post, Cervix & uterus taken, ovaries left): Husband said "Sex is way better than before". Wife said husband says sex is better because we're having it now. Orgasm is much weaker, if at all possible. Takes much longer. 2) (2 years post, cervix & uterus taken, ovaries left): Wife says "Sex is the same" (did not elaborate). Husband says: "Vagina is shorter, penis won't fit all the way". Wife says "Don't care about whether he fits all the way, I'm not in pain anymore....lol" 3) (7 years post, cervix & uterus taken, ovaries left): Orgasm takes much longer, is weaker. Definitely had uterine contractions, obviously missing those. 4) (10 years post, total, including ovaries, taken): Sex is so much better. Took several years, and lots of hormone therapy. (BTW, this woman looks amazing too). What makes me so mad is the lack of information out there. The ONLY medical professional even WILLING to talk to me was the 5th doctor, who spent quite a bit of time on the anatomy of the female orgasm. I cannot believe if this were about men, they'd be told "yeah, you'll be fine".

Thank-you so much for all of your information it's really good to know especially about the woman who had everything removed and said it was great. I'm still terrified as stupid as it may be to some people sex is really important to me and I have always been a very sexual person so that HERS site article really hit me hard and have been an emotional mess all day. For now I am looking into my other options uterine artery embolization and hysteroscopy with myomectomy I just want to put off hysterectomy for as long as possible. I feel better, less emotional and stressed out since I decided this, we will see what happens at the dr on the 22nd. Good luck in your recovery, I wish you awesome sex!!

I looked at every option possible for fibroids too. UAE, myomectomy, ablation, etc. Dr. William Parker has a very extensive site on fibroids; look it up to see anything & everything you ever wanted to know about fibroid options.

My situation, unfortunately, ended up in hysterectomy due to adenomyosis, not fibroids (took me 5 doctors to even get this diagnosis; 4 said I had "huge fibroids", which I never had).

But yes, there are many options for fibroids before moving to hysterectomy.

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Originally Posted by Summer2015 I looked at every option possible for fibroids too. UAE, myomectomy, ablation, etc. Dr. William Parker has a very extensive site on fibroids; look it up to see anything & everything you ever wanted to know about fibroid options. My situation, unfortunately, ended up in hysterectomy due to adenomyosis, not fibroids (took me 5 doctors to even get this diagnosis; 4 said I had "huge fibroids", which I never had). But yes, there are many options for fibroids before moving to hysterectomy.

Thanks, you've given me hope if I do ever end up having to have a hysterectomy. 😄

	Quote:
Originally Posted by Summer2015 I looked at every option possible for fibroids too. UAE, myomectomy, ablation, etc. Dr. William Parker has a very extensive site on fibroids; look it up to see anything & everything you ever wanted to know about fibroid options. My situation, unfortunately, ended up in hysterectomy due to adenomyosis, not fibroids (took me 5 doctors to even get this diagnosis; 4 said I had "huge fibroids", which I never had). But yes, there are many options for fibroids before moving to hysterectomy.

I don't understand how doctors told you that you had huge fibroids when you didn't. Fibroids can be seen on scans.

That wasn't me. I even saw mine on the scan as they had a huge screen right in front of me, so I saw as they measured each one. So, I hope there aren't any surprises

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Originally Posted by Lily7435 That wasn't me. I even saw mine on the scan as they had a huge screen right in front of me, so I saw as they measured each one. So, I hope there aren't any surprises

It was Summer2015 who posted that.

My sex life is fantastic. It has always been good and I was so worried that losing my uterus (including cervix) would ruin what was an important part of my life. My libido has increased and the big O remains the same or slightly stronger. The best part of all this is I'm ready for action every day of the month. My husband and I no longer have to check the calender when we plan our holidays.

I was worried about that too. I even put off my surgery for over a year because of fears. I had mine just before I turned 50. I was given the go ahead at 6 weeks and was very relieved that everything worked! It has only improved as my healing continued, nerves reconnecting and muscles getting back to normal. The lack of uterine contractions has been replaced with much longer and more intense orgasms. If you have good communication and a happy love life now, you most likely will in the future.