HELP! New and scared...

Hi. I've just recently joined HS after finding out that I need a hyst soon (most likely a TAH with possible BSO). In addition, a 2nd surgeon will be repairing a large inguinal hernia at the same time. I don't know why, but I'm scared beyond belief about having all of this done. I've suffered through 20+ years of severe probs (endo, PCO, polyps, prolapse and now suspected fibroids all at the same time) and had 4 surgeries already (not including C-section) so I should probably be relieved that I won't have to deal with this stuff anymore, but I can't get over the fear of the pain and recovery. I think having a relatively new high stress corporate job (less than 1 year) and lots going on at home is adding to the level of my fear (i.e. how will things be if I'm not the primary caretaker, hse cleaner, bill payer, etc.) I'm just worried about it all.

Anyway, thanks for listening. I appreciate it.

dhr92

Hey hon, honestly the pain isn't that bad. With meds it's fairly tolerable. I thought being off work for 6 weeks meant 6 weeks of PAIN....nope. Rest when needed and follow the doctors orders (don't lift anything over 10 pounds, no vaccuuming, bending, etc) and you'll be good-to-go!

I know how you feel. I'm a little less scared than was before finding this site. It has helped me come to terms with all of this and I feel much better about things now.

I have 4 children and I worry about how things are going to get done also. Luckily, my husband has a job where he has some flexibility with his days off. Stuff will get done when it gets done. That's what I'm telling myself. So hang in there!!

Michelle

Welcome dhr92! You've come to a good and safe place for support, answers to questions and preparing for your own journey.

Would it help to start making a list of the things that need to be cared for, and start planning for how to cover them while your recovering? Try looking through the checkpoints section too. It gives a good idea of activity and restrictions to expect week by week.

Again, welcome and ask as many questions as you like! Someone will probably have dealt with the very same thing.

Hi there,

I was petrified too.

I had a TAH for a massive fibroid that was interfereing with my bladder and kidneys. It turned out I was riddled with fibroids.

I had NO pain. On the first day, fresh out of surgery, I had mild discomfort that was nowhere near as bad as period pain. Morphine took care of that and my stay in hospital was completely pain free.

When I went home I had to learn how much I could do otherwise the incision area got a bit painful.

Now, 7.5 weeks out, I am starting to run for the first time in my life because I feel so **** good. I had taken 6 weeks off work but by the end of 4 was AMPING to get back. I then worked 1/2 days for 2 weeks. For those 2 weeks I had a bit of fatigue but now I have far more energy than I ever did.

Fear is natural and there's nothing you can do about that. I say go in with a positive attitude and enjoy the lovely sedate rest. For me, I was able to give myself permission to just rest. It was really nice.

Thank-you all for the kind words and encouragement. I appreciate the support. I am taking the "make lists of what needs to be done" advice and am beginning to work up a plan of action. I still worry about how it will all come together, but after having severe discomfort the last couple of days, I have come to realize that no matter what happens pre or post-op, I and "the fam" will get through it. It really can't be worse than the pain I've got now.

Thanks so much!

Donni

hi dhr92,

I live just down the road from you in Colorado Springs! You've come to the right website. The ladies on here have been a wonderful support net to me, answering my questions and just giving good advice. I don't feel so lonely about this procedure since I found this website, it is the best one out there. Your surgery is just two days after mine. From everything I've read on here, the vast majority of us LIW (ladies in waiting) feel tons better right after the surgery! Right now I feel like I have aliens in my lower abdomen, pulling and tugging at me from the inside. I am counting the days until I can go to the castle (hospital). Hang in there!!! The job will just have to go on hold for a while, and the family will have to pitch in!

Joan a.k.a. Skier GRL

The waiting is the abosulte worst part. I know that it is hard to believe but the pain after is not as severe as what you would expect. As for the housse and kids. You will be surprised! Tell the kids that you hurt, show them your boo boo. They will step up. The house and its mess will be there after 6 weeks. You find ways to ignore the mess. If it drives you too crazy hire a cleaning service. Just remind yourself that this is your start to a healthier life! Good Luck!

I love this saying - "fear is like a dark room - you turn the lights on, and there's nothing there". When I'm feeling fearful, I ask myself this:
If the fear could speak, what would it say? That opens a dialogue with myself, and many times I realize that fear is just that - fear. Usually of the unknown. I have it too; waiting for Feb. 9 surgery.

Meditiation, music, exercise, talking it out with a friend; anything to distract yourself from fear of the future can be helpful.

Then again, ask me about my fear level as the surgery gets closer!



Jennifer

It's so good to know we are not alone! My surgery is scheduled for 1/30 and I am totally consumed with it. On top of that, my significant other is having major mental problems of his own and has told me to ask another girl friend to come and stay with me as he is not capable of caring for himself right now, much less me. He will be out of the house by then but I don't know where he will be. I have to concentrate on my self now and not him.
I liked what jealbrecht said about fear--I am another girl friend who tells me you can't have fear and faith at the same time. Sometimes my faith is not as strong as I'd like it to be.
I just freaked out reading about some of the nasty wounds ladies have--another thing to worry about I guess!
Fear of the unknown--that is what it is. And I've never even been in a hospital before!