addicted?

hey there everyone. this is tough! i do not feel well. i will make it just fine though. i never want a stupid pill again. ever. there could be a candy dish in my family room, and it wouldn't bother me in the least. doc offered to send a script in, so that i could come off of them more slowly. i declined. i hurt like a ***** though. any ideas for rupturing cyst pain, besides that stuff? i just walk around. how much longer? i have a total bubble for a head. thoughts just pass right through. the doc that i spoke with today was lovely. she delivered my second boy, and i did it w/out drugs as i am so against them for myself. it was great to talk to her. she actually laughed when i asked her if i was a drug addict, and said NO! this is your body's deal. not your mind! thank you god for so many kind women in my life. there is some shame though. i still cannot bear to tell dh. not right, huh? i just want to do this on my own. good lord help me make it through. love you girls. h

Hi I am a recovering alcoholic and going through menopause with hot flashes, I have been sober for 2 and a half years and 3 years ago I had a hyst. I also suffered from a panic dissorder, but I went to treatment I go faithfully to AA and my life is wonder ful actually better than ever marilyn51

Dear Time2,
You will get through this. Don't beat yourself up for not wanting to share with your DH. At some point, and you will know when it is right, you can share it. Now just focus on getting through the pain. If the doctor has something that can help you through it without the addictive nature, don't be afraid of that. I am keeping you in my prayers and sending hugs.

I am really worried about you.

Suffering withdrawal symptoms is not good for your body. There's no need to go through this! While of course the ideal situation would be for you to have a relatively pain-free existence without mind-altering chemicals, now that you have become dependent (notice I did not say "addicted") to medications, it can be downright dangerous to quit without medical help.

I'm going to repeat that last sentence: It can be downright dangerous to quit without medical help. You may experience these withdrawal symptoms for some time, and after this, you may find you're still in serious physical pain! If so, you'll find yourself still needing pain relief.

Now of course, this is just my opinion, but here goes: I really urge you to swallow your pride and visit the doctor. If you do need to "get off" the narcotics, he or she will help you do so in a way which will lessen the sudden withdrawal problems. However, if you still have pain, and you need to stay on some sort of pain relief, your doctor can work with you to find something which can work.

Either way, however -- you can make yourself much sicker by refusing medical attention. It's not like you're going off heroin here. You've been using prescription meds as needed. Please, please get some help with this or you could really do some serious damage!

I am sorry if I'm sounding harsh, but withdrawal is not pretty and things could get a whole lot more unpleasant before they get better. I am thinking of you, and I want you to feel better as soon as possible.

hello ladies. i finally got the courage together to call the doc today. i had been seeing a doc in ft. collins, that group did my surgeries. they absolutely stink. HORRIBLE. they are the people that have been so nasty to me. they never took my concerns seriously. i would drive 4 or 5 hours each way to prove to them that i was actually having problems. every single time i have gone over there, i have left in tears.in the 14 drives since hyst jan. 25, they have found infections, internal bleeding, free fluid, 2 hematomas, and 2 hemmorhagic cysts. also, they said that they could feel adhesions through my skin. ole!
after all of that time in the hospital, i got a little scared of people touching me, and this anxiety has just spread from there. i then went to a specialist in denver. great guy, but also very far away. i finally broke down and went to a local doc in steamboat. she was nice. she's a little operate happy though, and of course, that scared me. she checked me out, and the second hematoma is almost gone, and the second hemmorhagic cyst has started draining. yippee! i have pain still though. but, i really, really want to be off of this medicine. she called tonight. (by the way, i called three of the docs that operated on me in ft. collins today. all of them were in the clinic today. none of them called me back. i left a message for each of them that said i was needing a few questions answered, that i was going to switch doctors, and i would never bother them again. could they please take five minutes, and give me a ring. none of them called. i have never been anything but polite to them. nice, huh? that is why i feel so unimportant) anyway, the lady doc here told me that she was having a meeting w/ her partner and nurse about my situation tonight. they were going to figure out how to help me, and wanted me to come in tomorrow. they don't think i am having withdrawl.? they think that i still need pain meds, and that this pain and stress issues from what i have been through are creeping up on me. they actually asked me what i thought i needed. i said i had no idea. i just felt horrible. they called in 3 different things. i am so thankful for all of the compassion and love here. you all don't even really know me, yet you are the only reason that i had the strength to call them. this has just about broken me, because i feel that i lost my whole self. not just some part of me. thank you. thank you. thank you. i'll let all of you know how it goes tomorrow. may each of you get a full, painfree nights sleep. late breakfast served by some hot guy that cannot speak english, and a day full of sunshine where gardeners run around at your whim to do your bidding. sorry-that's the best wish i could come up with for you. your friend, heather

Heather,

I'm glad you are getting the help that you want/need. Good luck tomorrow and I hope your pain gets under control real soon.

Take care

Talk with this doctor about your hormonal balance, too. I used to have those feelings with my PMS -- uncontrollable anxiety, shaking, the whole nine yards. It's possible that there is a hormonal component to all this, even if you kept your ovaries, and some attention to hormone balance at this time might help a great deal. It could be that some of your symptoms have nothing to do with any withdrawal of pain meds, and everything to do with your fluctuating hormones.

I sure hope you get some answers and relief. Please, PLEASE don't be afraid to share with your DH how you've been feeling. He can hardly be unaware of your distress, and should have NO "judgement" of your situation. It's a shame that this busy practice in Fort Collins can't take the time to meet your needs, but better anyway to identify someone local that you can see as you need to, without that long drive .

Big s to you, and let us know how the visit tomorrow goes, OK?

Audrey

Heather,
I'm so glad that you've found somebody to give you the help and support you need medically. After my long ordeal with my ankle surgery, I can empathize with your frustration, anger, fear and pain. My docs were great with helping me get the pain control I needed to heal and to wean me off when I was physically ready. Pain is truly detrimental to your healing and your peace of mind, so a lot of what you're feeling is a normal reaction to the pain. Many docs are reluctant to take the time to work with you when something goes wrong because they fear being sued or admitting they're not perfect. Don't let any more docs make you feel like you're crazy, a druggie, or that it's all in your head. There's always another doc out there so take your business elsewhere. Good luck with your new doc, she sounds like she cares and wants to really help you. I hope you find the relief you need and are soon pain free and happy.

That is great news about the withdrawal Heather. I am so glad to hear that.
Hang in there girl.

Hang in there Heather! I have over 22 years of experience in the field of chemical dependence treatment, from direct service provision to (currently )executive functions. Therefore, I have a bit of expertise in this area. I am very impressed with the level of knowledge and care expressed by those who have responded to your post. Two key concepts to consider are tolerance and withdrawal. Dependency is progressive in nature. At what point is it "addiction"? Tolerance is when more and more of the substance is needed to produce the desired results. In our cases, that would be pain management. Withdrawal is the central nervous system's response to the absence of the substance. You are experiencing a problem that is a serious medical problem, not a moral one. Therefore, the relief you seek can be found with a health services professional. If your health care provider presents a shame based approach to treating this, please think twice about continuing with that person. You have nothing to be ashamed of. I am proud of you for reaching out like you have. I think you will be pleasantly surprised at the responses you get from others in your life. Please keep us posted.