Travel - How Much is Too Much, Too Soon?

I just had a total LAVH on May 20, 2009. I am 55 years old. I have an aunt who lives 7+ hours away (by car) who is turning 90 on June 13, 2009. Since my abdomen wasn't "cut" during surgery, I have family members who think there's no reason for me not to attend this celebration. (They just don't get it!) Personally, I think it's just too much to ask. I know how easily I get tired and am afraid that, if I push it, I'll wind up feeling miserable and ruin the event for everyone else. Right now, I can't imagine sitting in a car for that amount of time either -- even if we stop every couple hours for a break. Any advice?

You have to do what is best for yourself. maybe when you feel up to it, you can go have a quieter celebration with your aunt. or maybe your family can chip in to buy your round trip airfare.....?

I had the TAH, tubes removed, etc on the 19th. Thursday is my post-op... After that appointment, my husband and I will drive the 4 hours to our property in the mountains, and I'm going to spend a week lounging in the hammock while he cuts firewood and plants apple trees... I have a trailer therre with a good kitchen and have been lounging around for the last few days menu planning and gathering books to read, and getting my beading stuff together so I can craft up there...........

The drive will be hard on me, but, that is my 'other' home and I won't have to be 'up' for company after we get there, so I feel good with my decision. I am 48. I cannot imagine spending 7 hours in a car right now. the 4 hours will be very hard on me......

I wish you the best in youor recovery and hope that you have your Aunt's longevity gene!

Chris

They don't sound like they get it. And they may not. And you may have to decide whether to take care of yourself or to take care of them. They may not like it, or understand it, but IMO you need to put your healing first.

Seven hours in a car is a long time. Then there's the seven hours in the car back, either that day or the next. It's exhausting, even if you haven't been through major abdominal surgery. It's not about the incision, IMO. It's about that you are trying to heal from major abdominal surgery and that's a pretty big task to take on three weeks post-op.

I don't know how you can get them to see this your way. I think you are just going to have to decline (if that's what you've decided to do, and from the tone of your post it sounds like that's what you want to do) and let them get glad in the same clothes they get mad in.

Luna

My advice would be to listen to your instinct. You were the one who had surgery, not your family members. They don't have to be uncomfortable riding in a car for seven hours; you would.

Just say "No" and be done if that's what you want to do. If your family members don't like it, too bad...

I can't imagine 20 minutes nevermind 7 hours!!!

Thank you, Sisters! I feel confident in my decision to forego this celebration, for now. My husband and I will make the trip later -- perhaps in the fall. This way, my aunt will get two "parties"! For now, I'm going to stay put and continue to rest.

I wish you all a speedy recovery and good health!

My surgery was nearly 8 weeks ago and I have found that riding or driving has been one of THE most aggravating factors for swelling and the pain that comes from that.

I only began to drive at 6 weeks which went well but still caused swelling. If you do this, please go prepared for it. DO NOT forget your tummy pillow and take your pain meds but I agree with the others that say to do what's best for you, after all you are the !!

Leslie
Age 55
TAH BSO with surgical staging for
Cystic Teratoma

if you dont feel up to it, just let everyone know and dont feel bad. you just had major surgery and only you know if you can handle that kind of travel right now.

I just has surgery on 5/19 and all I hear is take it easy. You should rest and take care of you. Besides, you don't want everyone to worry about you at the celebration...Take the time at a later date; I am sure she will love it.