Overly helpful family members?

So my dearest mother has been trying to help out since surgery with daily text messages of "how are you doing?" along with fb posts announcing my business to people who dont need to know, requests for me to call other family members to give them an update on my status and snyde responses if I tell her I really dont want visitors. My surgery was on Monday (she came to the hospital after surgery day of, though managed to throw a mini fit that morning about when I wanted her to come), been home since Wednesday, I dont have kids and my husband is home 100% of the time to help me out. Ma has always been one to need some control and major involvement, but now I think im at the end of my rope. Surgery takes a lot out of anyone, and I totally get that she wants to be there for me...but all she is doing is driving me nuts fielding her calls, texts, emails, etc. Does anyone else out there have experience with overly 'helpful' family? Any advice? I dont want to put a strain on our relationship, but I would really benefit from her backing off just a bit and let me come to her when I need to.

On the plus, if this is the worst of my post op issues ill take it!

I would suggest asking her for what you need, quiet time to rest, without making it about her, and thanking her for caring so much. If you can think of something she can be doing for you that keeps her out of your resting space, so much the better, and then she will feel useful. Family and friends just don't often get it that we need a lot of quiet and rest after major surgery, and visits need to be short for a while.

Thanks for the response. Yes I did have to go that route with her preop and it did help some. Maybe the hubby and I can think of some tasks for her. She lives 20 min away so I was hoping that would help...

My mom did something really sweet: she called my mother-in-law and asked her (since the MIL is local and Mom is not) to start a phone tree to ask people to bring me flowers and food. So from right after surgery until last Friday, people have been bringing both. Maybe your mom could channel her energies into making you some meals, and organizing the same from others. That was a lifesaver.

That is hard! I have the opposite, wish my mom could be here more, LOL! Give her tasks and tell her you are taking naps or eating ceratin times and to not call. If she does, let the calls go to voice mail and tell her you are resting. aAways tell her you appreciate and love her, but your surgery news should be private or your choice to update it to the world good Luck!