My Story And My Pain

Hi Ladies,
Well I wanted to update all of you. I have finished pre-op and I have 6 days to go till surgery. I am nervous but I am fairly sure I can do this. I will need to do basic cleaning in the next few days and pack for the kids to stay with friends for two weeks but other then that I am about ready. I have checked out some really good books from the library and stocked up on groceries although I will probably want to do that one more time before my castle visit. I am babysitting my neice who is now 3 months old for a few days so I can love on her and hold her while I can. She is making this easier then I thought. I really thought it would be harder having an infant around but I want to be able to do things with her and without this surgery I will not be able to do them. I will be stuck in bed half the time I don't want that. Her little smile looking at me type on here makes it worth while. My kids are getting scared and having nightmares but not about surgery. They are more afraid of me not coming back. The don't want to be away from me for so long. IT is in their best interest to do so though. I don't want them where I am staying for too long because it is crowded and it is the holidays and they deserve to have a good time not be bogged down with nothing to do. I have it arranged where they can be plenty busy. So wish me luck less then a week to go now. s to all of you Sassy

Hi everyone,
I reread this thread last night and so did all of the girls in chat. I think I am ready to put more of my story on here. I had my surgery as scheduled. There was complications during surgery and it took twice as long as expected. My poor bladder was totally beat up. I was good girl and drank alot and walked after I threw a fit to get that catheter out. It just hurt too bad. I got caught smoking in my bathroom so I started walking outside with my pain pump which was really cool by the way. I even fell asleep leaning on a wall at one point. I didn't have anyone at the hospital with me after surgery so that was really scary but the nurses were great. They babied me so much that one went as far as rigging the light string to the bed rail so he would know everytime I tried to get out of bed and I would need him. I started crying hysterically the next day and I started HRT which really helped. I didn't come home right away. I went to my best friends house. I had to go potty every five minutes and I couldn't walk to the bathroom across the house so she made me a porta potty next to the bed for the first week. I had a fever on christmas then it went away. My bladder was not handling things ok so I was in a lot of pain. My doc believes pain meds are our friends so I was given plenty. I did nothing but walk to the bathroom the next week and my kids were brought to me christmas day. I had missed them so much and they missed me too. I came home at two weeks post and that was really hard. My ex came to stay with me and he was a little help for a few weeks. I got all kinds of infections. Everything still hurt like crazy and I thought maybe it had been a mistake. I couldnt see the light at the end of the tunnell. But ladies some where along the way things got better. I was put on meds for my bladder and another for my back plus more pain pills and I sleep all day while the kids are at school. Never for more then one hour at a time all night and day but things are better. Yesturday I saw the light. It is close I can still see it. I had a few hours yesturday with not one pain not one problem I cleaned I played with the kids I went to store to buy cigs and I got my first pang in hours. I hurt but nothing advil didn't take care of. But for a few hours for the first time in 19 years I saw the end of my pain. My heart is healing. I can do this ladies. I still have phantom ovarie pain and doc said we will deal with that at next appointment. My back still hurts at night but I know it is going to be better. If I can feel better then anyone can. Ladies no matter how bad things are now and if you don't have the perfect recovery we all hope for YOU STILL WILL GET BETTER! It just might take longer then you thought. I am at 6 1/2 weeks and I have had a good day so maybe today will be good too. I am hurting now but I want to go back to sleep with a half a pain pill like I did yesturday. I look foward to the rest of the day. Good luck ladies. s to all of you. I hope seeing my update has given some pre ladies some hope. Sassy