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From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
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01-18-2015, 01:59 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 13
Hysterectomy:
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
I am 42. I have no children. I have adenomyosis, multiple small fibroids, retroverted uterus, heavy bleeding, bloating, constipation, intermittant sharp pains, back pains, mood swings, depressed, tired, my bleeding has been practically constant for at least 8months, so I cant wear thongs, cant wear certain clothes, dont want to go anywhere, no interest in sex....(I even told my partner he can 'relieve himself' elsewhere if he wished and actually love when he's working away) I have wanted this hysterectomy desperately for the past year. And after a painful cyst 2 weeks ago, the gynae says 'ok, we can do the hysterectomy......we have tried'
Guess what.....I am in shock, I should have been relieved at the decision I wanted...instead.....I'm sad....I don't want children, and it would be a risk even if I did....but this kind of confirms that my life will be just me forever? As much as I want this, the fact that it will happen in March doesn't make me scared nor anxious....I just feel very very sad and incredibly confused and wishing what? I dont know...something to do with the past maybe...
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01-18-2015, 02:31 PM
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Posts: 72
Hysterectomy: December 3rd, 2014
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
All of these feelings are normal. It's a decision that's easy for some (cancer) and not for others. We are here for you!
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01-18-2015, 02:46 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 13
Hysterectomy:
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
thanks Donna...It's so weird....I want it, but I really want, but I really DO want it...but I still feel crap? I cried even though it's not a surprise, and I'm prepared but I'm dazed at work. Of course I'm anxious about work, the op, recovery, potential problems...but my confused feelings of a non-life threatening problem leaving me has me quite puzzled as I dont feel I should be feeling anything but satisfied and positive.
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01-18-2015, 04:05 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 63
Hysterectomy: December 3rd, 2014
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
Rita100: I can somewhat relate to what you're feeling. We are the same age & I just had my 6 week post surgery check in last week. I found out I had fibroids two years ago & started feeling really bad about a year before my surgery. As the fibroids got larger, I talked with my doctor & decided on a TAH. after I made my decision, I started second guessing myself & reading stories about ladies on here who were in much worse situations than me. I knew I didn't want kids so that was a non-issue for me. I just didn't want to start having procedure after procedure knowing nothing would be 100% except the hysterectomy. Just the thought of losing major organs was disconcerting at first but I came to peace about it when I realized that body parts don't make me a woman! My DH was very supportive & wanted me to do what's best for me so on December 3rd, I had my TAH, keeping ovaries.
My recovery has been great...no major issues. I've just had the regular stuff people have shared on here. I realize that everybody's situation is different but reading everybody's experiences has helped me with perspective. I went back to work last Monday & am pushing forward to my new life!!
All my best as you prepare for your surgery!!
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01-18-2015, 04:17 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 84
Hysterectomy: January 14th, 2015
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
Not to sound ask Zen master on you but maybe it's the expectation that's out of whack? I know that even though I was sure of my decision and that it was a good one it *still* left me questioning and doubtful.
Heck, sistah, it's a body part, why wouldn't you feel a bit conflicted about losing it? It might have been causing you grief for a long time, but it's your grief and you've learned how to cope with it. I can see how that alone would be a little confusing to lose- I mean what's it all going to be like, yeah?
I guess what I'm saying is that you can know something is a great decision and still have second thoughts.
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01-18-2015, 11:53 PM
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Posts: 287
Hysterectomy: February 9th, 2015
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
While the decision is made for us, if you think that makes thoughts about the surgery any easier than it is for those without cancer Dx, you are kidding yourself.
I hate the fact that I have no choice but to have this surgery now, and just having the dx doesn't make it easier. I suspect that if I had a poor quality of life due to bleeding or pain then I be begging for any solution. With no symptoms at all though, the need for such major surgery is hard to process. The grass is always greener as they say. Plus those of us heading into these surgeries with gyn/Onc's are pretty much all looking at BSOs with no hope of getting HRT along with no idea what else might be missing from our bodies when we wake from surgery.
Please don't make it sound so easy... at the absolute least no-one wants a cancer Dx.
Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I've just spent the day with some really insensitive people.
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01-19-2015, 12:45 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 13
Hysterectomy:
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
Thank you for all your replies ladies....and I am glad you were there this morning (I am a Londoner living in Amsterdam)....I guess the best thing is to accept my feelings, read the posts, and take one day at a time....all the best on your journeys...happy for the company on this fantastic site 😊
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01-19-2015, 12:47 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 13
Hysterectomy:
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
You're absolutely right Zen Master...I was a bit frazzled yesterday, but yes. Makes sense
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01-19-2015, 07:20 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 84
Hysterectomy: January 14th, 2015
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
Oh believe me I understand. I had both ivs in my arms, and had just spoken to the anesthesiologist. After he walked out the door, I turned to my husband and said, "I don't want to do this, let's go home." Hehe
Really I just needed to know that I *could* leave if I wanted to, it was me feeling like things were out of my control. Once I reestablished that it was me making the decision, not my doctors or heck the universe or whatever I was fine again.
Good luck And Godspeed with your surgery and recovery. And know that this is a great place to go when you're feeling frazzled.
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01-20-2015, 02:21 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 13
Hysterectomy:
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: From Really want it, to HUH???!!!!
Thank you!!! Big hugs from Amsterdam :-)
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