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displaced fear (children mentioned) displaced fear (children mentioned)

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Unread 01-04-2012, 02:44 PM
displaced fear (children mentioned)

So i am not sure if its hormones, or diaplaces fear or what. But today was horrid on anxiety. I have been a full time nanny for years. Today 3 month old Alex had gas probs. So i layed him on the floor and keep bringing his knees to his chest to help him pass the gas. (I might need this post op from what i hear.) But i just sobbed as he sobbed. I am normally the one who has no issue taking the colic baby and know the screaming and fussing is just that and can handle it. Wrap em up in a carrier on me and talk softly and never get worked up myself. But today, oh my. I just cried and was gripped with anxiety. Like this morning i thought "3 weeks from Monday." I know i need to do it. But i wish it was done already! This waiting is killer!!

I am most worried about pain post op. I had my gallbladder removed and the hospital experience was less than ideal. When i woke up in recovery the nurse asked me how my pain was and i told her horrible. And asked for something to help with pain. She said to another nurse "she must have no pain tolerance." Which really upset me. When i was in a room and admitidly lied to go home. I told them i had passed gas and all that and hadnt. Because when i asked for something for pain they told me they would have to admit me to give me something stronger. I was in pain and upset about what the nurses said in recovery and just wanted to go home. So i lied. I guess i worry it will be like this and worse. i am kinda freaking. 3.5 weeks. Seriously? I thought being back at work would make time go faster! I guess not with my emotions all outta wack!

Too much is happening too fast ans too slow. I was less nervous to get on a plane doing mission work in a third world that is hostile to the gospel. And so much happening in Africa, that i would be back sooner if this was done. My period was 5 weeks, then nearing 8 weeks. And who knows maybe it will be back tonight. We all know the emotions, and mine are wacky. Add surgery stress and WAITING. I almost wish i could forget im having it till that day.

I just needed to vent i guess.
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Unread 01-04-2012, 08:08 PM
Re: displaced fear (children mentioned)

I feel for you. I have been through the same thing. the waiting is the hardest this. I have four days to go and the time slowly passes, but I think back to 5 weeks ago and I was sure I would never make it to here.

once your in the hospital, you need to speak up, if you feel pain say it and if you need to demand it!! no one deservse to be in pain! i'm sure that you will have a great experience!!

Stay positive and you are in my thoughts and prayers!
Unread 01-05-2012, 03:38 AM
Re: displaced fear (children mentioned)

Thanks Js. I hope this experience is better. That last one was not for sure. But i cant help but wonder. I am glad its this month. I just am having a hard time waiting and having all the planning done. I feel like there is nothing left to do but wait. Its more.frustrating than i ever anticipated!

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Unread 01-05-2012, 05:04 AM
Re: displaced fear (children mentioned)

I was freaking out too. In fact I was shaking in pre-op. Everyone kept saying "you'll be fine" I wanted to yell back "I know but that's no help right now!" I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder and made sure everyone along the path knew.

I am day one post op and have been managing great just on Motrin. I will admit i have a high pain tolerance. I did get a Percocet during the night for a headache, I have no pain tolerance at all for head pain. I was a crying mess from no sleep and the headache. They had me on a water-circulated heating pad since I've been in my room and I was given a Tylenol suppository during surgery which I have heard helps a ton. Finding a comfortable position to sleep and sit is a whole other issue, I think I have used every towel and blanket in the hospital as a bolster. I hope this helps you some.
Unread 01-05-2012, 09:03 AM
Re: displaced fear (children mentioned)

I was the same way I was so nervous about the surgery to where I was having severe anxiety attacks over the fear of pain. Well went in the 21st of december (just 2 weeks ago) and after the anaseisa dr came on they gave me the medicine in my iv to calm my nerves (versed I know that's spelled wrong) and it helped I was in la la land until after waking up. Now after I came too I was in some pain but they kept pushing the daloted (sorry I'm horrible at the spelling of these drugs-but that's the strongest narcotic out there so it took me about an hour to get pain under control) but once it was under control I was like wow that's it? I was expecting so much more pain. I had 3 laporosicpies done (where they lazor/burn off the endometerois off) and 3 c-sections (bc I can't give birth naturally) and both of those types of surgery (which are more minor compared to a hysto) and those were way worse on the pain level than the hysto was (not to mention my gallbladder removal was a lot more painful than the hysto as well). Now I did have the de vinci robot where you have a few small incisions and they pulled the overies, uterus, tubes, and cervix all out vagionally style hysto (not sure if that's how they r planing on doing yours or not but I think most r planned that way unless the get in find a lot of problems then they have to go back to incision style hystro). I was more irriated than anything after surgery (which that's how I always get after any surgery I just get flat out irriated with everything) but I was told my hystro would be outpaitent so I was so annoyed when I had to go up to a room and walk, eat, and go to the bathroom twice (and produce so much urine each time) before they could send me home. I was up walking with no pain what so ever and ready to go home but I couldn't pee the full 200 (cc ?) The first time so I literally took my glass of water and poured it into the thing on the toliet that collects it just so I could go home. I was more annoyed with the fact about having to pee a certin amount to go home than anything ( and normally with 3 kids 1, 2, and 4 years old I'm all about an overnight stay in the hospitals but bc I was told it was outpaitent I felt that I shouldn't have been taken to a room let alone the labor and delivery floor- and I should have been actually sent home from the post opp). And if they r going to send you a room to recoup before letting you go home they need to do it else where and not on a floor where women r just having babies, to me it was like throwing salt on an open wound, knowing at this point I now can't have anymore children-granted our family is complete and we didn't plan to have more its still the fact your not able to make that choice anymore and having the babies wavied in your face I think is what threw me more into anxiety mode. (Sorry to go off on my tangent) so the pain for me was never actually painful I was a little sore (imange doing a lot of situps/crunches one night and the soreness you experience the next day) my actual monthly cramps were a hundred times worse than anything I felt after surgery AND I am the biggest baby when it comes to pain . But for me the frustration was the worst part of the experience (but if I had it to do all over again I would still do it) not pain, so it was nothing at all that I would have expected it to be (my mom had one 15 years ago and she was in a lot of pain and was misserable and had to stay at hospital for 3 days so I was expceting the same but they way technology has advanced so much it was not at all like I thought it would be) but since its sounds like you are like me with the anxiety attacks (I've battled that for years so its not something brought on by the surgery alone) so I just wanted to give you the heads up on that aspect on it because if you tell them going into it the can also give the verst after you come to afterwards to help cut any anxiety after surgery as well. So in a nutshell the only thing I delt with after surgery was just the frustration after surgery and now looking back its nothing bad or anything but that's just how I respond to anasietisa and everyone is different as to how they respond so you may not experience that but if you do remember to talk to your ob/gyn and anastesia dr before surgery about getting something after the surgery bc you do have anxiety issues and they can have something waiting for you incase you do expierence it afterwards! But I'm not going to tell ya to don't worry about bc (even though it is a breeze) until you know yourself after its done other people telling you doe not make your fears and anxiety go away, and for me it actually just irriates me more bc it feels like people were just patranizing me which I hated. Good luck with your surgery and remember don't allow any nurses to make you feel like your pain is nothing (if you have pain) and don't let them get to you I have had some doseys of nurses and while most are wonderful some can be straight up (well you know what) and those are normally the ones who has never experienced the surgery themselves and therefor don't know what's it really like. And they r probally jealous bc they have to give the feel good/in la la land drugs while they r stuck working lol! Keep us posted on how it went ill be praying for you that you have a painfree experience like I did
Unread 01-05-2012, 02:55 PM
Re: displaced fear (children mentioned)

Thanks for all your support! It helps to know I'm not alone! I will probably need something for nerves! If only they would calm my nerves the next couple weeks! I have to go back to normal life n just deal with pain. I cant take anymore off work. But i am sure soon enough this will all be a distant memory!

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