My boss is driving me crazy!!!

I am 4 weeks post op tomorrow. I had a TAH. Two weeks ago I told my boss that my Dr said that at 5 weeks I could go back to work a few hours a day if I felt up to it but he would not release me until at least 6 weeks. Fri. I met some of my co-workers for lunch & who showed up but my boss. Asked me again in front of everyone when I was coming back. I told him the same thing. Then this morning I get an E-mail from him asking when I "plan" on coming back to work!! I am feeling such pressure & almost harrassed about this. I've already told him 3 times now. (I sent him another E-mail today telling him AGAIN what my surgeon said). My disability papers say 6-8 weeks. I don't have to go in next week if I don't want too & if he keeps this up, I won't. Anyone else getting pressured from work to go back? I'm about to contact our HR representative about this. I'm really feeling stressed out here.
Thanks ladies
Robbie

contact the HR person- besides your disability are you eligible for FMLA? find out- if you are he needs to back off- you can take 12 weeks if you want and he can't say a thing about it!! Even if you are not, do not let him harrass you ( and that is what he is doing) or make you feel guilty. your health comes first- hey ask him when he is going to come over and help you at home so you can recover faster- maybe he can ?



________________
tah/bso everything is gone- especially the pain

There is no way I would go in part time if I was you. He is pestering you now and you should expect that to continue. I bet if you go in he will expect you to do a full day's work. Personally I would be making plans to take the full 8 weeks if not 12.

I agree. If he's pressuring you now after you've been very clear with him, it will only get worse when you go in part time. It seems that he's only concerned with work and not for your well being. You need to take care of yourself first and not let him make you feel guilty. You deserve the time off to regroup. Be well.

Hi,

That's the problem with going out to lunch with co-workers or doing anything else while you're out recupperating. Your boss thinks that if you are up to that, you're up to working, which is usually never the case, but they just don't see it that way.

If you need to, have your doctor call your boss, or send a letter stating when you will be returning. And don't be suckered into going back to soon. You still have a lot of healing to do, and need the time to fully recupperate.

s,

Lisa

I agree with the other ladies here. I'm speaking from personal experience. Although on the surface, my boss wished me well, told me I had done a wonderful job of preparing for my absence, and after coming home, I received e-mails from her telling me to "take it easy", etc................ I felt the pressure. Phone calls came in daily for CRISES that occurred at work (Two of my brand new exchange students got expelled and sent back to their home countries... I made an appearance for a few minutes 7 days after surgery to meet my new group of students that had arrived while I was recovering. I returned to work "on a limited basis" after only 2 weeks. I left a couple hours early each day, thinking I was doing them a favor by coming back so early (Wasn't I?). Everyone was shocked to see me back so early, but the shock wore off early, and after a couple days people just assumed I was 100% and that's what they expect. Take your time to recover. Once you're back, you're BACK!

oh i feel for ya, i had the same problem with my employer. She called me at 3 weeks and wanted me to come back. I didnt, i came back at 5 weeks. Wound up taking 4 days off the next 2 weeks. And she almost fires me for being sick. So i got my surgeon to write her a letter, telling her to get off my back and if i need to be sick here and there, i am entitled too. They dont care, only about money thats it. Dont care if you just had major surgery. Put them in their place, get another letter from your surgeon and give it to them.

Good luck

Hi,
Go to your HR dept. Tell them you feel harrassed.
In the UK, if you have a doctors paper, they are not allowed to contact you, except to enquire about you in a reasonable way.
This is very unfair. Do you also have an employee relations dept? They are usually pretty good at liaising between employee and employer (your boss) and they will help him in how to deal with sickness and absence the appropriate way.
s

Thanks for all of the support & replies. My daughter said he is not allowed to ask me when I'm coming back. She works in HR. She said that once the Dr releases me, I take the release papers into work & that's that!! I am going to contact my HR representative today & give him a heads up on what's been going on. I also sent a copy of the correspondence from my boss to the BIG BOSS!! Knowing him, he'll tell my boss to lay off.
Thanks again for all of your support. This site is the greatest!!
Robbie

Hi.

Make sure you document everything, save copies, and get it all to your HR department. Your boss has no right to pressure you...take every single minute that you can to heal. I am 6 months post-op and can tell you that resting is extremely IMPORTANT. Part of healing is also going out once in a while, but remember not ot over do it. I stayed out for 7 weeks and then went back part time until I was 100% up to it (I have an hour and a half commute each way). I was lucky enough to have a great boss, but remeber, this clod won't be around for the rest of your life, but your body will. You should have him read some of these posts so he can see that he has made himself into a world-wide jerk.

Feel good.

Susan