Ok... its official

I think I am having a nervous breakdown. Feeling really depressed, less than effective at everything I am doing. My anxiety levels have been really high the last several days and only getting worse. I keep thinking of all the stuff that has to be done before Tuesday, and what everyone and their uncle wants me to do before I have my surgery.

I have my kids wanting to go here, there and everywhere. Mom, can I go here where it costs $25 per person. Forget the fact I am paying for them and their friends to go to another place while I am in the castle.

My sister wanting me to fix her computer before my surgery.

My mom wanting me to fix her computer before my surgery.

My Candle "Dealer" wanting me to hook up with her before then.

A family reunion on Sunday that everyone insists I need to attend.

and my poor DSO, he is getting neglected and doing more than his fair share to help me because he knows I am feeling so overwelmed.

Its like I have so much on my plate that I cant even complete one item. I am forgetting even the simplest stuff. Simple communications with my DSO to let him know what all is going on and when.


I will say however that my DD did a really wonderful job on running the vacuum. No more carpet fuzz balls to annoy me. And my momma and daddy will both be at the hospital while I am having my surgery.

I have the perfect idea.... go to sleep today.. and
wake up on Tuesday before I have my surgery.

Top ten things I am grateful for:
10 ) Kids that somewhat do as I tell them.
9) A loving family that is there for me.
8) My mom finally opened up to me and told me how hard of a time she had before she had her surgery and how her emotions were running high.
7) A great big fluffy dog named Bear who protects his mommy and comforts her when she is down.
6) Only 4 more days til I can get rid of the pesky girl parts.
5) Xanax.....
4) Xanax.....
3) A great Dr who listens to my needs.
2) my DSO's fluffy robe he is giving me to take to the castle.

and

1) A DSO who holds me when I cry... stays around even when I think he should run off screaming about what a crazy lady I am. Takes control of handling the kids busy "social life" so I dont have to figure it all out.


my mantra of the day..... "oooooohm.... ooooohhm.... oooohm"

Well, I somewhat know what you mean. My surgery is the day before yours and I have been working like a maniac trying to get my house spotlessly cleaned for my mom who will be coming and for the potential visitors who will stop by after I come home.

I've often thought to myself: "I'll work hard now and finally get to rest AFTER my surgery!"

Best of everything to you!

Oh Tracey Lynn! You are being over-taxed.

1) First of all, IF those kids are old enough to take care of themselves to a certain degree, LET THEM. Carefully explain that you need down time and rest to unwind. You certainly don't want to get sick before surgery!

2) Fix computers? When other's people's needs come before yours, knowing what you are facing, then this is selfish....sorry.... I know because I am the family computer wizard, as well....sigh....

3) Sounds like you have an absolutely WONDERFUL DSO! WOW! Also, sounds like your Mom is very tuned into you. My Mom did the same thing as yours with high emotion. She even broke down and cried. She is sad because I was never able to have kids and is sad for what I am about to go through. I DO have a stepson though so I must count blessings and realize that life happens.

Here are some tips....it sure has helped me!

- I have decided that the time I am spending with my husband is more important than anything. I have been pampering and thanking him in advance for what he is about to do. He has taken one week off of work to be with me. He is so very worried about me.

- I decided heck with the housework....it'll get dirty in no time flat anyway. I have decided to organize and clean the way I NORMALLY do...nothing special. My husband is certainly no Felix, but my Mom and friends will assist after he returns to work. I will just have to smile and say thank you while biting my tongue when hubby is here....

- I have taken the time to read, hang out at this forum, and take a nice calgon bath with candles and everything. Feels really, really good!

Life is so very demanding and you know what? Sometimes you must realize that you're not a superhero and learn to politely say, "No".

Take care!

Jackie

	Quote:
Originally posted by TraceyLyn My anxiety levels have been really high the last several days and only getting worse. I keep thinking of all the stuff that has to be done before Tuesday, and what everyone and their uncle wants me to do before I have my surgery.

Oh my! You are me a few days pre-op! :hair: LOL

Try to relax. It doesn't really matter if everything gets done. I really wore myself out about 3-4 days before my surgery and was getting really down. I finally just had to quit and take care of ME. After that, my anxiety level went way down.

Best of luck to you! Trina