New but had my surgery on april 4

Hello everyone. I had my surgery on April 4 and just returned home yesterday. I was suppose to have a laproscopic vaginal hysterectomy and that is how they started. According to my surgeon, they were almost done when they realized they couldn`t reach some of my parts so they had to open me up. A 2 hour surgery turned into a 5 hour surgery and I am cut up and bruised from just below the ribs to the bikini line. I am not a happy camper. I am in pain, swollen, and it feels like a parade is going on inside my lower abdomin. Further more I had a really bad reaction to morphine and would stop breathing every time I feel asleep. What was worse is I could feel it happening. I had people just watching me and it was so scary! During my week in hospital I kept a mental diary of how, if I should live through this, I would be making some big changes in my life when I recover. I have had other surgeries before and came through sore but fine. This time was different. I am still in a good deal of pain but refuse anything stronger than a tylenol because of the drug problem.
I am still suppose to have a bladder repair in June but am pretty sure I will live with poise pads for the rest of my life instead of go through something like that again.
I am angry and sad because of this. I just wanted to spit some venom out

Oh honey. Hugs. We all understand the frustration, pain and anger. Let it out so you can let some good feelings in. It does get better. Remember to give yourself time! Hugs, hugs and hugs!!

Hi. I am so sorry to hear about all you have gone thru. Just remember that we are all hear to listen and share our journeys - there are so many amazing women on this site who are willing to listen and share what they have gone thru. It has been so helpful to me just to know that anything I have felt since my surgery has happened to others.

My thoughts and prayers will be with you as you recover. Please just remember to Pamper the Princess!!

Smallpaws, I am very sorry to read that you are having a tough time of it right now. It sounds to me like you got a little bit more than you expected, and that you are disappointed and still dealing with it all. But, Sister, if you just had your hyst 4 or 5 days ago, then you are still in early days! Meaning, you should be resting, pampering, and healing. As you heal more, you will feel better. I promise! Love from me to you.