Fear~

I am 24 and having a complete hysterectomy on August 11, 2003. I have had many surgeries, but I am TERRIFIED that I will no longer be a "whole" woman anymore... how do I deal with this?

I too am only 26 and scheduled for a complete hysterectomy and fistula repair aug 18. I know exactly what you are saying. Im terrified and not so much about the surgery as what to expect afterwards.....will i be depressed? will i feel the same? what about sex with the dh? I dont know what to tell you but it sounds like we are normal...I think everyone has the same feelings and every woman is different on the way they react after the surgery...just try and keep a positive outlook even though sometimes that seems impossible.

Thank you, Traci... I am not so much worried about the depression, the meds I take for My transplant already affect that... or the sex, but I am more concerned about the "whole woman" thing... Good luck, sweetie... and keep Me posted!

Hey Storm,


I can so relate to you & the " feel like a whole woman" thing. Though I am nearly forty so not as young as you it is still a concern of mine as well. To add to the hyst. I'm also have some "things" removed from at least one of my breasts at the same time! They are small as it is and I don't have anything to spare!! lol! But seriously, I keeping having those same thoughts....if they take my breast/s, or even part of them, and my uterus, tubes, overies & possibly cervic what will difine me as a woman?
This is where I'm at with it right now......my spirit, my soul, my heart & my compassion are what makes me who & what I am....a "WOMAN" of much experience. My tender touch.....my soft spoken words........my nurturing nature........the way I think & reason........the way I walk & move my body, no one would confuse me with a man...............

My surgery is on the 15th of Aug. so you are a few days ahead of me. I'm going to be trusting for all of us that when we get past the surgery we will KNOW we are still all WOMAN!!!!

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Let us know how you are doing.

Ladies

As a been there done that Sister, I can say that YES you are and WILL be 100% a Woman. It's been all that... and a bag of chips

Keep to the positive and prepare yourself!!! cause you have a lot of living to do and life after Hyster IS GREAT.

's and best of luck

Storm, I think that in some shape or form we all go through this. I can only imagine at 24 it might be more intense than I at 37. These parts that they take or have taken don't define us as women, they are just parts. From almost everything I have read the sex is just as good if not better, I wouldn't know yet I haven't gotten my release for that yet!!
I found comfort from talking to women on this site and also speaking to people who have undergone the surgery. I know it sounds cliche but I do believe everything happens for a reason and we have to make the best of it. The fear of the unknown is always the worse. I think you'll find after your surgery is over and you are healed you may turn into a regular sex kitten!!
Good Luck

Buy yourself a nice box of chocolates, a pretty new crown, and hug yourself, look in the mirror and repeat after me,
"i am not my uterus"
"i am not my uterus"

after all, this is what feminism has fought for all these years, to drive home the point that women are NOT defined by their reproductive organs.

You aren't your uterus. Feel the fear and do it anyway
{{{{{{{{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}}}}}}


FL

I am 50 so, I have the benefit of this wisdom... it's true though. Your "femaleness" or "womanlyness" is in the head. Do you feel like a wonderful, sexy woman when you are pms'ing or, cramped up and feeling horrible? Well... the surgery will clear the way for a more full, happy, sexual life.

The sex can be even better after a hyst. I was a bit curious about it and was a bit apprehensive to say the least the first time after sex. I felt terrific about it all once I tried it.

Go stock up on sexy, expensive, beautiful panties.. because you can now wear it without worrying about what might happen!

Wow, listen to me.. I'm still feeling a bit fatigued, a bit sore at times, but... I'm going shopping for some nice lingerie....

Hope all goes smoothly and you can get to that place where you are free to be you!

to go till my TAH (cervix is going too), I am so worried. But, my hubby tells me that it's what in your heart that makes you a woman...not the female anatomy. I have to believe this. Since I won't be able to take the HRT (cancer), I am worried about the sex, sex drive, etc. Also without a cervix, is it going to be the same? I so understand what your feeling...I guess it's just something we have to believe.

I had my hyst because of cancer... can't take hormones and haven't had a problem. I did worry about it and for me.. it's been ok. Some night sweats for a bit.. (occasional), a few hot flashes, but I was having them anyway and that's it.

What kind of cancer?? Have you checked out the Hormone Jungle?