Scared to Death

Okay, i've been reading for awhile (read: a year or so now) and am finally FINALLY being admitted to the castle. I'd go into my history but it is old and boring and probably way tooooo familiar to most of you.

My surgery is Monday Oct 20, and I have to admit, truthfully, I'm a little freaked out. I'm afraid of dying, NO 1, I'm afraid af horrible hormonal reactions, I'm afraid of many many things.

I've been through surgery before. I am not usually a fearfull person.

Just now.

Because.

Monday. I'll be okay......right?

I'm afraid of a lot of things with this surgery.

Afraid I'll have bladder problems afterward. That what little sex drive I have now will be totally gone. That they'll find more than just CIN 3. That I'll have to tell my Mom who is facing a tough cancer battle herself that I too have cancer. Afraid that my stomach will look awful afterwards.

But I try to remind myself that I don't really have a choice in this. And it somehow makes it easier to accept and the anxiety starts to diminish.

Hang in there. And let us know how you are doing.

It is important to remember the chance of death is really really low and mostly it is because of really off the wall complications, if you have had surgery before you have already had general anesthesia most likely and if there was no severe reaction to that then that is a really good sign that you will most likely not have a problem this time. Of course that is always a possability, I know this probably isn't very comforting but if it is your time then it will be painless and peaceful.

As far as bladder problems go I need to find out more about that myself but the thing is that there is nothing you can do about any of this now, the best thing you can do is take a deep breath, try not to think about it, because there is nothing you can do to help yourself by getting all worked up over it. I have been through surgeries myself and I have been through multiple surgeries for my children and boy I would rather do surgery myself a million times before putting them through it again, I have learned that there is no point in playing out all the bad things that can happen, it only gets me more stressed out which will make it harder to heal. You do need to be aware of the risks but being aware of them, trying to be prepared for recovery that is good, however you can go overboard and just panic, which it sounds like that is where you are at. Take a deep breath and tell yourself that everything will be fine, it is now out of your hands and so don't worry. Easier said then done I know, but if you keep pushing those thoughts from your mind it really does help.

I feel much better. Still scared but feeling much better knowing that someone out there knows what I am going through or am about to go through.

Tired.


Scared.

ALone.

Hi Lauri,

My surgery date is Oct 21st and I know what you are going though. I am going through the same fears, but you have to remember that this type of surgery is VERY common and thousands of women go through it every year. Educate yourself through books and even this site to find out how many others have dealt with gas, spotting, pain and other issues. I have read and spoke to many women recently who have gone through this and 80% of them tell me that your quality of life will improve dramatically and that you will have wished you had done this long before now. Some, even, have lost several pounds!!!! Their sex life has improved 100%. As scary as it is, keep a positive attitude and KNOW that this going to be a wonderful thing.

God Bless and best wishes. Let us know how it goes!

Hi, LauriF!

Sweetie, you may be tired,
You may be scared.
But here you are never, never alone!!!

At Hyster Sisters, especially us LIW, we're all tired and scared to some degree and we're on this site cause we don't want to be alone.
I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Remember to write when you can and let us know how you did at the castle!


Pam

Lauri,

What you're feeling is entirely normal. All of us go through the same sort of emotional rollercoaster ride before we go to the castle. It's like we just can't get our brains to shut down for a second....it just keeps running with "what if...what if..."

As for being alone, you're not. We're right here for you, always ready with s and hopefully to make you feel better.

I'm only 6 weeks post op and I feel better than I have in years. The difference is unbelievable. I still have to take it easy, but all I can think is WOW!!!

All of us will be waiting to greet you on the better side when you're up to posting....and you know we're all sending our best wishes with you for an uneventful castle visit.

s and lots of good wishes,
Cat

Hello Lauri!

Just want to offer you some more encouragement and hugs to go with the ones the sisters have already sent you!

Your fears are so normal! My brain is running a mile a minute too, and if I let it get the best of my, I'll panic. We all worry about complications, dying, will I still be the same afterwards, etc. For most of us, life has been stressful with pain, bleeding, whatever up to this point and we are all hoping for relief. I've read and read and this surgery, while major, is done so often and with few serious complications. Makes me feel a zillion times better to talk to our sisters on here, too! What wonderful ladies!!

I will keep you in my prayers!
Hugs!
Beth

I was so scared about dying, see I had surgery when I was 13 and almost died so I was scared thnking what are the chances me making it through surgery again. Everything went fine and surgery was over before I knew it even started. Think at that time we get scared and think of everything that could go wrong instead of all the positive things later. I will be thinking of you. Hope everything goes well. Love, ((((STITCHER))))

Your almost there................one day to go. Try to relax, if you can. I was quite calm the day of my surgery and hope that you will be to. The waiting really is the worst part. Good luck for tomorrow and I will be thinking of you. HUGS Kay