Does anyone understand?

Hello....
At the age of 26 I had cervical cancer and had a radical hysterectomy. I have no children. I was married a year later by a man who claimed to not any children. Now, two years later he admits to me that he wants a baby. Ever since then I have been on an emotional rollar coaster. Of course I want a baby, but now that he does too so much is going through my mind. We looked into IVF w/a surrogate and we just cant afford it. We dont even own a house yet. I am having self esteem problems and feeling useless, I am afraid my husband will leave me for a woman that can actually have his baby. I dont know what to do now. What is the next step????? I have noone to talk to about this. I just feel that my family nor friends will understand what I am going through. They say they understand but how can they? Plus, I was always the "strong" one and I cant let them see me a mess. I need someone to talk to who knows what I am going through.
HAS

Dear HAS,


I am so sorry you are in such a rough place of pain and self-loathing. Please know that you are like no one else who has ever been, and that your husband chose you for this reason to marry. I know it may seem like there is no answer from God for your need to have a baby right now, but surragacy is just one option of several. Please remain open right now to what he may be trying to tell you. And please let your husband know how you are feeling -- you need to know his love for you is unconditional. I think you would feel so much better.

Please let us know how you are doing! You are in my thoughts and ,
With love and light,
Loretta

So sorry to read your thread,life sure can be cruel cant it? Dont really have any useful advice but just wanted you to know you are not alone. I am 37 and had tah 4 months ago, like you I have put a brave face on to everyone but inside it is a different story. Seems everywhere i look there is kids and everyone is falling pregnant. I try to be realistic and tell myself it just wasnt meant to be but easier said than do. Unlike you my partner has been great,but sure he has deep down inside, the same pangs.
If your relationship is strong enough and you are meant to be together it will ride this out and you will discover other things to enrich your life together.
Take care, karen

Dear HAS,

I have to agree with what Loretta had to say. There are many options for you guys and you are no less a loving, beautiful wife than anyone else. Just because you cannot give birth, doesn't mean you cannot be a wonderful mother. It sounds like you guys have a lot of love to give a child and there are many out there
that need it. Good luck in your endeavors.