Resuming Intercourse

will the dr at 6 weeks say I can resume intercourse, IF SO WHAT SHOULD i EXPECT, SHOULD I GET DRUNK OR TAKE PAIN MEDICINE BEFORE, I HAVENT IN SUCH A LONG TIME I AM SCARED AND HUBBY IS TOO! AND ANSWERS PLEASE I KNOW THIS IS A SENSITIVE SUBJECT BUT IT IS ONE EVERYONE OF US NEEDS TO KNOW ABOUT!

Hi, Ice Cream,

When your doctor gives the OK for sex, you and your partner may want to think of you as if you were once again a virgin. You'll need tenderness, understanding, and above all patience, from your sexual partner, if you're going to enjoy the experience. Plan for romance, lots of foreplay, and plan on taking it slowly. A glas of wine may help you to relax. You may want to try just "making out," and see if you want to proceed with sex.

My husband and I did all of the above, and I still didn't have an orgasm, the first time we made love after my surgery. I didn't know what to expect. I was very nervous. Would it hurt? (It didn't hurt me at all.) Would I bleed? (I didn't.) Would it feel the same? (Not exactly the same, but still worthwhile!)

Once I relaxed, I started having orgasms, and soon, we were back to normal. This is just my experience, and your experiences may be different.

Good luck, take it slow, and enjoy.

Best wishes,
Helen

I am 8 weeks post-op. I was given the "green-light" for OUTERCOURSE at 3 weeks, waited until 3.5 weeks. It was AWESOME!!!! And, YES, The BIG O was GREAT!!!!!! Even quicker to respond and response was much more intense than ever!!! I didn't cramp, bleed, hurt.....nothing, just enjoyed it!!!!!! FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME!!!!! At 6 weeks we were given the all clear for INTERCOURSE!!! I was SOOOOOOOO NERVOUS!!!! I was afraid it would hurt (it didn't). The fact that we had positive outcomes from outercourse did take alot of the pressure off of me for the orgasm!!! I already knew that was working! We took things very slow! I was afraid I would be too dry (not a problem), and I was prepared with KY just in case. I was afraid it would feel differant. It did, but NOT in a bad way!!! It was actually better...for both of us! We were told to try minimal penetration and see how it was and then let me be the one in control of how far things went. Well....minimal was fine, and I was SO ready so......things went well!!!!!!!! We have had intercourse three times and all three times were GREAT!!! MULTIPLE Orgasms, no cramping, no bleeding, not sore afterwards. I use to cramp and bleed for a few days after. This is the best thing I ever did for our sex life!!!! And, the hormones I am on I think add to some of my desire! I worried pre-op and before we had sex, that I would loose desire, I didn't....it is much stronger than before!!!! SO......to answer your ????'s.......we all heal differantly and we all had our surgeries for OUR own reasons...even if they were same diagnosis'. So, our sexual responses will be differant. I do know that y'all need to try and relax as much as possible!!! We had a nice QUIET...childless evening (which for you isn't a problem, but mine are 7, 4,4) I went and picked up take out from a NICE restaraunt (so I would not be too tired from cooking*wink*) Fixed up the dining room with candlelight dinner and met him at the door with a silky nighty on!!!!! (hadn't done that since our kids were born!!!!) Turned on soft music and ran a warm bath...to share!!! By the time all that foreplay had happened....we were both well on our way!!!!!!!

Take it easy and slow and ENJOY!!!!!!
Ronda

i AM SO GRATE FUL FOR EVERYONES ADVICE AND EXPERIENCES, THIS BOARD HAS SAVED MY LIFE LITERALLY AND HOW MANY WONDERFUL PEOPLE THERE REALLY ARE OUT THERE THAT ARE WILLING TO SHARE THERE STORIES TO US, AND GUIDE US THROUGH THIS ORDEAL, GOD BLESS EVERY ONE OF YOU FOR JUST LISTENING AND ADVISING. ICE CREAM

HI Ice cream

I am 7 weeks today. Yesterday I went for my post op and got the green light, D/H went with me and walked out with a grin on his face when we were told. So last night we tried it, both a bit nervous, It was great no pain WOW!!! the big O !!!! was the best that I have had, and I had no bleeding.
This morning I thought I would have a pain or something but I feel great.

Just relax and take it slow and >>>>ENJOY>>>>>>

Heather

hEATHER, THANK YOU i HOPE MORE PEOPLE WOULD RESPOND ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCE, iF YOU THINK ABOUT IT IT IS SCARY iTS LIKE DOING FOR THE FIRST TIME, i WAS DRUNK THEN BUT HOPE IT GOES THE SAME FOR ME i SEE DR ON 10TH AND MY DH BIRTHDAY IS 12/25 HOPE i CAN GIVE HIM A GIFT......

I am only 11 days post op and all I can think about is doing it and what to expect.. I am sooo afraid it will hurt or that I wont get arroused... I still have my ovaries but I lost the uterus and cervix... I am glad to hear of the women that it was great it makes me feel a little bit better!! I am also afraid of even reached the big "O" afraid that it will hurt!!
I guess I still have 5 weeks to stur about it before I even can think about doing it anyway. My doctor said nothing should change and that I have to at least wait 6 weeks
When they do it vaginally is there always stitches. This sounds stupid but I dont even know if I have any. I didnt ask and he didnt tell me either way. I would assume if I did that they were dissolvable. This hysterectomy was a emergency so I never got to talk to him about it beforehand.. Thanks, kris1975

11-02- tubal
1-03-D&C
10-03 Endometrial Ablation
11-03 LAVH-still have ovaries

Hey, I love the things we talk on in here!!!! I can tell you that I am scared to death about my 1st time with sex...the dr. has already told me that Im ready on 12-24...he winked at my husband & said "your welcome" It was funny...you had to be there...anyway...If I could give the most humble of advise....I would have outercourse alone to see how it is different...I was allowed to do so & I found my "o" different...it was still great, but it felt different inside...I am just breathing a sigh of relief because you have no idea how my sex life has suffered this past year due to sickness...my dh & I have been married a year (in this past July) & he got the sickness part of the vows right away....sigh...anyway...I ramble sometimes....I wish us all the best luck!!! I dont know how we will function, but Im looking forward to my life w/o my pain that I had b4...hope that you all are as well!!

My DH would die if he knew I was sharing this on the internet

I am 5 weeks TAH BSO today and was given the green light by my . I couldn't wait to tell DH and then was pretty nervous on going to bed tonight. I tried "outcourse" during my recovery many times and was happy that the big "O" was still out there. Any way...we had intercourse tonight. I was pretty anxious and tense....was it going to really hurt? ..... was I really healed at 5 weeks? ...was I going to bleed? well....it was very nice. We took it very slowly and I tried to relax....as much as a hyster sister could....and there was no pain, no bleeding and I think if I could have relaxed a little more...the "O" was there. It is still very enjoyable but it does feel different. I can't wait to try it again when I am more relaxed. So hang in there and don't get too anxious about it - you heal and you go on. Our bodies are magnificent on how they can bounce back and still give such pleasure after all we've been through.

Thanks for sharing your stories!

thank you yeah my dh would kill me for this but that is what these boards are about, I cant ask him , I am still scared because my V still hurts thre a tightening feeling but friday I will be 5 weeks and still light spotting when I do to much. Thanks again