My turn now!!

Well, I found out today that I am to have a hysterectomy ASAP.
I let my boss know this evening what was going on so that I can schedule the wonderful operation at my earliest convenience.

I have had 2 friends the last couple of months that just had their surgery and now it's my turn and the tables have turned and I'm freaking out a little inside!!
I know there is nothing to worry about because it will be so much better and take care of any problems; but what if there are other problems??
My husband is a nervous wreck and doesn't quite know how to react to this news. I keep tellign him it is for the best and things will be so much better!! I am trying to tell myself that but it is still kind of scary!!!!!!!!

I was just expecting to have an endo ablation but after my sonogram and tests at my appointment today there is no waiting around. My OB/Gyn wants to do it ASAP!!

I am not too worried about the female parts being removed, but just the fact that I am gonna be down and out with 3 kids and a hubby who can't seem to do anything for themselves.

How are they going to survive??????
How is my house going to survive??????
My house will be a total disaster by the time I get home from the hospital!! What am I gonna do with them and my house?????? My mother has offered to help me out, but you know how mothers can be sometimes.
Also have neighbors that say they will help, but I am always the one who does things for everyone and always seems to get used and for some reason I just keep on doing.
What if no one comes to help me out like they say they are?????

I'm sorry I'm rambling on, but these are my concerns!!

Hi BlueChick!

I too, got the "ASAP" comment from my doctor...a week ago. And I am going in today to have it done. I have the same concerns about my hubby and kids, buy have been trying to put thise concerns to rest, as I have to worry about myself right now. Remember, you'll still be home, you'll just have to shout orders from the couch!! LOL! Don't worry, the kids will survive. A messy house is still a home as long as you are there to give them love.

Take care. Time for me to head to the castle!!

Bethany

Hi,

Your worries are the same that a lot of us get. We're so used to being the givers that sometimes we forget how to receive. Believe in the people who say that theywill help. You may have to remind some of them, but a good many probably really will help if you let them. I asked and received home cooked meals, errands run, and a bit of help with my handicapped DD. Don't be afraid to let people know when you need help.

This is a link to some Faq's for Family and Friends, it's got some great info. I printed it and gave it to my DH, it helped him a lot!

http://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/hsa...p?s=&id=117127

Best wishes.

s

I got my ASAP on November 6 and my hysterectomy on November 25. I don't think I would have been ready without this site.

For me, I only had a teen daughter ( and two children in the early 20s who were off in their own concerns) but I am the single support for my home with no sick days or medical leave on my job and had just paid my car insurance so my savings were depleted. As to who would help me, my family are hundreds of miles away and not with resources to come help me and my friends had not proved reliable in situations in the past so I wrote a post about my fears of dealing with this alone. Sisters here helped calm me and gave me invaluable encouragement and prodding to do what I needed in what time I did have to prepare.

If I was to have any chance of making it through these weeks I am now in, I would need to lay aside my pride at being self-sufficient and the caretaker for others and do what I needed for me. The way I put it was, I had to "beg, steal or borrow" what I needed for me.

Well, my parents came up with one months rent to help me out until Employment Insurance can kick in to give its minimal respite. My 20 year old daughter left her independent life to come spend her time with mom for the first two weeks of my convalesence. A neighbour kept an eye and ear on my teen daughter in our apartment while I was in the hospital. And the same neighbour -- who was a friend who had let me down in the past --stayed with me at the hopsital for the morning until I went into surgery, visited me every day at the hospital and took me home and helped my teen daughter settle me when I was released.

As for the rest of my concerns, the Sisters here let me know that I would be severely limited on what I could lift for the first 6 to 8 weeks (no more than 5-10 lbs), I shouldn't do pushing activities like sweeping, vacuuming, scrubbing floors, and that it might be hard to get up and down easily at first. I got done what I could before I went in and even reaaranged some shelves to give me access to things I knew I would need in these weeks.

As to the other concerns in my life -- like the children I work with that I am not there for right now and can't even go visit yet because I am not strong enough -- I am having to let go because I know that I will have to heal well if I want to be able to really be there for them in the long term. I call them and say hello and from what I hear they have the biggest smiles on their face every time I call them but for now, that is all I can do.

The best thing you can do for your family right now is heal.........Do what you need to, get support anywhere you can and GIVE the gift of letting others be there for you. That is what I have found. The people in my life have appreciated me letting go enough to let them help me for once. You might be pleasantly surprised. (And I am finding I can live with a bit of a mess around me for now.)

Peace to you as you come to terms with this time in your life.