Things just seem to get worse for me

Well it is day 4 and things just keep getting worse. I had to call the Dr this morning due to Thrush, which is making eating and drinking difficult. I am still in pain and when I asked her about it, she said there was nothing else out there she could give me, due to all my allergies and my peptic ulcer disease. So I am pretty much on my own as far as pain.

Then this morning I developed crying spells. IT hit me what I had done and then I got so mad and upset. I wanted another child and now I can;t physically do that. I have fallen into a deep state of depression and don't want to do anything. I came here to let off some steam, but I even feel like I am wearing my welcome out here. I feel like I am bothering my DH everytime I ask him to get something or do something for me. I feel like my 2 yr old resents me, he seems mad at me. I feel like I am bothering everyone, including everyone her. I feel like the world hates me and I am just a big bother. My friends don't call me. Nevermind. I guess I am just being a big, whiny baby. I am sorry

You are not at all whiny and not at all wearing out your welcome here. We all know what you've been through. You just went through major surgery. Do you know that the recovery time for a hyst is much longer than that of open heart surgery? The early days of recovery can be difficult. I remember not only abdominal pain, but gas pain, periodic fevers, never being able to sleep through the night (unfortunately still have that problem) etc... Lack of sleep can bring you down. If you have had your ovaries removed or even if you didnt, (sometimes they dont start functioning again right away), you may have some hormonal issues.

Do you have DVD's you enjoy or could your DH go out and rent some for you? I think it might help if you got your mind off of your situation. Either watching a good movie, reading a book if you are up to it or calling an understanding friend. If you still feel really down, maybe talk to your doctor. Maybe he/she has some suggestions that will help. I am still having trouble sleeping through the night and my doctor gave me ambien. I guess its new. Its a sleep aid. Maybe your doctor could prescribe that for you?

Oh, shoot, wear out your welcome here? I hope not!!! If so, I'm sure I would have done that very quickly.

Whine away!!!!

You have legitimate reasons to feel sad and whiney. I was sad and whiney, and I did not have thrush, and I am 46 with none of the regrets about childbearing that you have.

BUT I did have regrets, because I felt like I was in the depths of hell, and could not imagine that it would get better.

It did. You may not believe this, but it will get better. At 4 days post op, a conversation with me would have included sobbing and negativity like you've never heard before. Then, miraculously, a little over a week post op I suddenly felt like I was re-entering the world of the living!! One day I was thinking I should just give up, the next day I felt like fighting.

Don't give up, and don't stop posting. Do try to look for whatever positive things you can (maybe even start a gratitude journal a la Oprah) because that will help.

You could never wear out your welcome here!

Sorry you are still having a tough time. Hopefully each day you will be a little more healed.

I think a 2 year old loves their Mother and adores her no matter what. They are at a cranky time of their life so just take it with a grain of salt. I know, easy for me to say. I am a Grandma and certainly have a whole different outlook now.

Take it one hour at a time if you have to. I was still in the hospital at day 4.

Just keep telling us all about it all you want and we will be here for you.

Hi Kim,



It sounds like you're having quite a time right now! I'm so sorry. The first couple of weeks after surgery can be a big shock to the body, both physically and emotionally.

But you could never wear out your welcome here. We understand what you're going through because every one of us have been where you are. We know how you feel and we care! So feel free to vent all you want. That's what we're here for, to help support each other, not just through the easy times, but through the bad times too.

Believe me, this will not go on forever. You'll soon be up and around and back to your life again. But for now, you need to rest and be pampered.

Big s for the new

Lisa

I did not even feel human until about 8 days post op. You are still in the worst part of it.
It's OK to cry and be whiney. Don't be so hard on yourself.

It will get better. I am a bit over three weeks post op and it's a lot better but I still have my days.

If you can't stand this throat problem go to a good Ear Nose and Throat Dr. they are used to dealing with this and may have ideas that your other Dr. Does not.

Good luck!

{{{{{Kim}}}}} Honey, you're going to feel like death warmed over for a bit yet. I was just out of the hospital on day 4 and would not have DREAMED of getting on the computer. Bed to potty to chair to bed, and a little food in there somewhere, and wrack my brain to figure out my meds. That was it. Oh yeah, and hopefully sleep a while (which thank heavens was no problem once I had my pain management under my own control again).

You'll be over the biggest hump soon. Hang in there.

As for the pain stuff..... Have you tried warm packs or cold packs? Hugging your belly pillow along with these? A little aromatherapy? (Lavender essential oil often has enough soothing effect to take the edge off a lot of icky stuff.) You're not going to get much more than the edge taken off with these external things, but that might be enough to at least get some sleep.....And the more you sleep, the less you'll be awake to feel how lousy you feel.

Hi,
Oh my I so agree with all of the posts, Your mood swings can be hormones the MAJOR surgery you have been through and PAIN meds cause mood swings and depression. But keep taking them so you can heal, don't beat yourself up, be a princess, we all have days like this and it will get better, your only 4 days out give yourself some time! I have a little one too and they can tell we hurt or are sad and they react, it is okay, they need to learn about emotions and you need to not feel guilty about it. In a few days you will feel a lttle better and so will the little one, of course she will have more mood swings then you! It's okay!! she may like to help care for you, maybe she can carry something to Help mommy and be the nurse, she can help and feel important.

Okay go be nice to you!! REST
HUGS
Mary

Kim
can you eat yogurt? if you can it will help clear up the thrush. As for the can't sleep at night..I'm also up and down all night..but for that matter all day too..so although it is broken sleep I know I'm getting in the hours I need. Face it after major surgery we feel like crap even under the best of circumstances, We were placed on an emotional roller coaster weeks before surgery and now are not only coping with the after effects of surgery but are coming down from the waiting period we had to endure. All that preperation and not knowing..geeze!! Just take a deep breath and keep in mind it will get better. You've come this far. You sound like an independant person .. I am and find the not being able to do for myself the hardest part. But know I will be doing for myself again in time and everyone else knows it too. Just take care of yourself and just like surgery day the day will be here before you know it and you will be independant once again...Good luck