Living alone

Hi all,
I'm one month post-op, and I thought I'd offer some advice to those princesses who live alone, as I do...

Before you enter the castle:

1) Get your home ready! Towels, bed sheets, comfy clothes, undies, socks...take them all out of drawers, and stack them in one convenient easy-to-reach place (I have them piled up on my dining room table....)

2) Do a kitchen once-over. How heavy is your pan? Your pot? When in doubt, do yourself a favour, and go out and buy an extra light version of each.

3)How accessible is your food? My pantry is hard to reach (have to lean down to get into it). As a result, I have a supply of dry food stacked up on my kitchen counter.

4) Can you reach all your dishes and glasses? Remember, there will be no climbing up on chairs or standing on tippy-toes for the next couple of weeks.

5) How easy is it for you to get in and out of your shower? Not to sound like a granny, but I suddenly was finding it slippery to get in and out of my tub (and I'm 40 & usually in good shape!) Get yourself a bath mat beforehand. Seriously. You'll feel a lot safer with it.

6) Check your windows and doors before you go in. It will be very hard for you to slide them open or closed, and I even had trouble with pulling open my back door for the first 2 weeks. Err on the safe side, and leave them locked up.

7) Buy as many supplies as you can. I bought a lot of frozen dinners, and they've come in handy. Avoid too many fried foods, etc, because your tummy may be a bit wobbly for the first few weeks. Go for nutritious and easy to eat things, like soups, pudding, packaged meats, etc (think extra protein and extra iron). Don't get the big container of milk. Buy 2 of the smaller ones. And remember: chocolate heals all.

8) Find a store that can deliver. You will run out of some of your supplies every couple of weeks.

9) Prepare a supply of stuff to keep you busy. Visit your local knitting store if you don't know how to already (I'm horrible at it, but it helped pass the time at first). Pick up crossword puzzle books, doodle art, books, magazines, jigsaw puzzles, paint-by-number, connect-the-dots, you name it. If you've got cable TV, think about increasing your available channels for the next month. Pretend you're going to be trapped in a rainy cottage for two weeks or more. What could you do to keep yourself occupied?

10) Tell as many people you're going in as you can. I was so nervous beforehand, I barely told anyone. As a result, I had very few people calling afterward, and I felt very alone. Don't be shy about it. People really do want to help.

12) Farm out your pets, if you have them. My cats stayed at my neighbor's until 3 weeks post, and my dog just returned home 4 weeks post (and he's only home because I have a dog-walker who's coming 3 times a day). You will miss their love, but you won't miss the cats leaping onto your lap, or the dog yanking at the leash.

13) Your home will turn into a disaster zone. Resistance is futile. Instead, try seeing it as a Discovery Planet experiment ('What can happen to dust balls when they are allowed to breed freely for over a month? Let's watch...')

13) Remember: we are all alone when we go into that operating room, whether we live alone or with a family of 15. On one hand you may have less people to support you; on the other, living alone has already made you stronger and more self sufficient, and you will find it easier to find the quiet time you need to rest and recuperate.

14) Reward yourself each and every day for your bravery and courage. You are a hero for doing this. You are giving yourself a better, healthier future. This operation is the best gift you can give to yourself.

Good luck, sisters - see you on the other side!

WOW! This is the best advice I could have received. I live alone and would rather not have someone sitting and watching my every move. I've decided to take this weekend and a few days next week to prepare my home. I'll be going to the castle on 6-28-04 at 5:00 a.m. My mom who lives 45 minutes away is freaking out because I've decided to stay at home and recover rather than come to her home. I've handled a lot of things on my own. Living alone has made me strong and a little stubborn. So, I told her that she could stay with me for a few days and then she can just stop in to visit. I enjoy my quite time and have enjoyed living alone for a while. So, I don't think that being alone post-op willl hinder my recovery like she wants me to believe.

Thanks for the wonderful list. I've already printed it out and I'm going to the store to pick up a few of htose items.

Oh, I forgot to add a few more life-safers to my list:

1) METAMUCIL. Seriously. I have never been so grateful to a product in my life.

2) Extra large undies! Whatever size you normally wear, increase them by a size or two. And beware of waistbands - only extra loose and comfy will do.

3) Speaking of which - loose fitting dresses are a life saver, and skirts are way better than pants. Why not add a new summer dress to your shopping list? (I even bought myself pretty night shirts and a matching bathrobe for the castle & recuperation period - I'm sure the nurses thought I was a real princess. Exactly right, of course!)

And one final little tip I forgot to mention....

My incision became a bit raw at the end of the first week. I decided to treat it like any other cut, and let it air out overnight. I slept without underwear, but kept the sheets away from my bare tummy by propping up two big pillows on either side of me. I've slept that way ever since, and my incision is healing amazingly...

I also live alone and this was extremely helpful. I have 2 cats and a blind dog that would be traumatized if taken out of my home but I am going to put their food containers up high so I can reach them and hope for the best. You suggested many great hints that I will find very helpful. Thank you so much.

Diana

Thank you wellred....

This is great....

Great list!

Here's a few more:

Get some library books.

Sign up for a movie DVD mail service.

For cleaning out cat litter, put a chair next to the cat box and scoop out and put in paper bag. Only put one or two days worth of stuff in each bag. I'm still doing this routine. I had someone come once/week to take all of the bags out to the trash, clean up their area (they have an enclosed porch), and then take the trash out to the street.

If you keep your pets at home, get one of your friends to agree to be the designated pet emergency driver. Two of my pets got sick in the middle of the night (different nights) when I couldn't drive them to the emergency room. In one case the pet was ok till the next morning, for the other I drove anyway (it was nearly 2 weeks) and he was fine too. But it could have been a disaster for the pet and an emotional disaster for me. Especially if you have a big dog and you cannot get him/her into the car. So the suggestion of having someone else take care of them is a good one, however I didn't have anyone and couldn't afford to put them in the kennel for weeks. Plus I needed them for my emotional recovery.

Have someone come in a few times to cook for you. It was wonderful to have some home cooking (I'm a terrible cook) those first couple weeks. Each time the cook made a main dish and a soup and I froze most of it. She also went to the store and bought the food.

Housekeeper once before and a couple times afterwards.

I didn't have someone stay with me my first night home from the hospital. In retrospect, I would have really liked that although I didn't need any help. My next door neighbor is one of my best friends so that made me feel comfortable being alone.

Oh, thought of one more tip which I sure wish I had done...paper plates and cups for the first couple weeks to you don't have to do the dishes!

Iphie

Thank you! Such good advice! I'm writing these down

Just wanted to tell all you ladies that are living alone you have my highest respect!!!!!!!!!!

You Go GIRl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!