Too scared to be happy- getting the hysterec

tentaive hospital date - 11 FEB. 2005!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks to all your help and support, I am with Dr. 4 now who has agreed to give me an hysterectomy!!!!!!!!!! I am still so overjoyed - I cannot believe it! But, I cannot quite enjoy it either as I do not know what procedure wil be done and how. At first he said if does an hysterectomy, he only does the whole thing. I expressed deep concern overing losing ovaries at 34 years old and we have agreed that he will leave the ovaries barring any gross pathology (endometriosis, tumors, cysts). I trust him and know he will use good judgement while he is in there (he has operated on me in the past). But it does not change the fact that I do not how to prepare, physically or mentally... And my husband is really worried...

I have a "Pre-surgical consult"appointment with Dr. 4 on wednesday, at which time I am hoping they will confirm my tentative hospital date - 11 FEB. 2005!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - My husband will come with me to this appt. and I will even request that the Dr. 4 spend a few minutes alone with him so DH can freely adress his concerns. I am sure we will arrive at some more solid conclusions about the surgery so I can prepare. I have read this site all day, for one!

The concerns are: My husbands mother had TAH/BSO and he claims that she was never the same afterward (but will not specify, also complaining about her before surgery but not describing the difference... which is making me cancel out out this concern altogether and chalk it up to familial dysfunction). So, he is scared that the "same" (undescribed) thing will happen to me.

I have accepted the fact that Dr. 4 might have to remove the ovaries because I know he will only do so if it is medically warranted. That said, I am deathly afraid of HRT! I have had so many problems all my life with this gyn thing and if the ovaries go - it will just be the beginning of an whole new gyn thing! And not the triumphant end to the reign of terror I have dreamed of.

Does my m-i-l need to come up and help me? The hospital is an hour and half away (in Baltimore) - if it TAH rather than LAVH that will make a big ifference... and how long will I be in the hospital? becasue my husband wil have to commute everyday that I am in there... I suppose I wil have more of an idea on wednesday.

Also, cervix or not? I sort of relish the idea of never having a pap smear again... but this question of sex and orgasm is weighing on my mind. Not only am I 34 year old newlywed (only four months) but my husband just turned 27! We are both very converned about this - we have not even had a honeymoon yet!

I tend to agree with Dr. 4 - why not make the whole thing worth it and just get rid of every last crummy bit? But I am from the ain't-broke-don't-fix-it school.. but I am also from the why-do-it-over-when-you-can-get-it-right-once school, too.

I had such difficulty with BCP (birth control pills) and medroxyprogesterone did nothing for me - I am so worried I will be a top contender for the most posts on Hormone Jungle! Does that history mean I will have difficulty with HRT?

I did not know that I have PMS - but after reading the description, I DO! So, removing the ovaries will really help. Would removing one and keeping the other help?

And then what if I do wake up and I have the ovaries? Then I still have my period without blood to deal with - which I think is enough help for me - but the PMS is getting worse... Maybe ovaries in and progesterone therapy after supracervical hyster?

I have no idea, I am so confused now. I am looking forward to talking to Dr. 4 on wednesday but I thought I would just get this out there for you all who have been there to help me... Thanks!


I want to be a happy princess

Cool .... our projected dates are the same!!!!!!!!!

I think that you really need to sit down with DH and tell him that until he's able to explain to you what changed with his Mother, there's no way that you can take steps to avoid/minimixe it happening with you.

I'm having a TAH/BSO and my recovery time in the hospital will probably be 3 days give or take one, depending on how my bowels are recovering.

It may be a good idea for M-I-L to come out for a few to help out, if you and your DH can take it.

Good luck and keep us updated... I actually took a list of 20+ questions to the gyn's office w/ me this morning.... He's really good about this 'cause he knows me. that's the whole reason why he set up the appt.

Hi Opal - Thanks for your reply. I am writing my list now and oredered DH to come up with a reasonable explanation of his fears The doctor can address them personally.

I am afraid to be on HRT at my age and I am bit afraid of keeping the ovaries because they are the casue of so many other problems. Why not throw it all out?

Does the cervix make a big difference?

Will a vaginal cuff actually shorten the length of introitus?

I suppose I meed not worry so much, trust Dr. 4, and go from there. My life has been very, very hard the last few years with many losses and great difficulties. I am strong and I am holdong up the best I can, but if this sx. could trhow me down some ladder into despair = I could never handle that!!!

Thoughts on keeping cervix?

As far a HRT is concerned... we're both too young to not be on it... when we go through natural menopause, it's usually between the ages of 40-55. You'd still have 6-21 years before you would be in natural hormaonal decline... We're just not made for that... Look around when you're out. Women who are past he age of menopause are more likely to have problems with osteoperosis, rhuematoid arthritis, and other inflammatory diseases... and that's just the start... That's why they use HRT. The thing is that while it puts an immense strain on their systems... it puts more strain on ours. I have endo, and the HRT may possibly reactivate my endo. But I'm going to try anyways, because I owe it to myself to try to keep myself as healthy as possible... That's why I'm here

I'm having my cervix removed... from what my gyn said, it shouldn't be a problem at all... During arousal, the vag canal elongates anyways... he also said that the instance of granulation (scar tissue) in women our age is very low.

Don't get down on yourself for being "paranoid"... it's your body!!! you have every right to be just as protective as you need to be!!

If you need to talk or just to vent... Feel free to PM me

My husband is making matters wAY worse - i wish I could make him go out of town for a while... I was so excited about this but now I have some very real concerns on my plate - the biggest of which is becoming him - and not my own health. I am mad at him for robbing me of my joy - which was already diminished in this keep ovaries/loose ovaries dilemma. He is making me otlly afriad to wake up from surgery and I do not even want him there now.