I need positive post op sex stories!

Hi All
Please, Ive just plucked up the courage to look over on the sexual problems post op board and I have absolutely terrified myself. This is a huge issue for me as my sex life has been damaged enough by all my prolapses and before coming here I really thought this was gonna be the answer to all my problems. I am only 36 but my hubby, bless him, is only 27! I had not realised that i would be losing all of my lubrication once my cervix goes! I hadnt realised that orgasms could lose their punch,boy mine have already lost that!! Please say more women have no problems in this way cos I am seriously considering cancelling the whole thing now!
HELP
Alison

I haven't had the surgery yet so I can't really answer this question for you but I want to tell you what my doctor told me.......

She said that it is different for everyone and therefore to ignore the horror stories that some people may tell you. Just because someone else had a bad experience doesn't mean you will.

It like the childbirth stories you hear when you are pregnant and you go in there scared to death then when it is over you are like, wow, that wasn't that bad. (or at least that is what I found to be true for me and childbirth)

Hang in there! Things will work out. Stay positive! And good luck to you!!

Alison, you're not alone in your fears! I was REALLY worried about this, too. Maybe I can help, at least a little: at nearly four weeks post-op and doing pretty well, I haven't been released to return to "normal" life yet (wink, wink), but I CAN tell you based on some "play" with DH (and few really nice dreams) that not all of us lose our lubrication and, um, *ability* to have VERY pleasurable feelings (yes, O) after losing our uterus and cervix. (Actually, I EVICTED mine, and gladly.) Feels funny and a little embarrassing to write this, but it's better than having you out there all worried and sad! I do think you tend to see more about the difficulties we can encounter on a site like this, mainly because people who are enjoying fabulous sex don't usually take the time to write in!

It DOES get better!!! And the lack of pain is awesome. I didn't realize how I had come to expect the pain during --- and afterwards. It makes me sorry I waited so long to have the surgery, but SO glad I finally had it done!

Amoreena

WOW lucky you feeling so darn randy so quick!!LOL. Thanks for the reassurerance !!!
Alison

needsomerelief is right!! My Dr told me the exact same thing!

I figure I will deal with that if I have to...but I am not going to worry myself sick over it. There are far better things to worry myself sick over...:hair:

I was talking to a friend of mine (she had a TVH/BSO), she says it was far worth it to get rid of all her pain and bleeding. So her and her hubby need to use some kind of lubrication, who cares!! She isnt in pain anymore, and lives an otherwise 'normal' life!
I too was worried about orgasms, and my friend reassured me that they will still exist...they are just 'different'. Not better, not worse, just different!!

Everyone is different. In my situation, it can only get better!!

Try to remain calm, and think rationally... BELIEVE ME, I know this is hard to do!! I for one am a complete NUT about this whole surgery thing!! Things will work out just fine!!

Hi,
Yes I agree, orgasms are just different. And I didn't lose lubrication, though I had everything out! It takes some time experimenting: but that isn't bad! I am taking estrogen-only HRT, and had no menopausal symptoms either(I was 46 when I had my hysterectomy).
I think the secret is not to push yourself or hurry your recovery. And when you go back to sex, take your time and don't necessarily aim for the big O-that's too much pressure!
s
Gillian

Some things I neglected to mention earlier in my haste:

I think one of the reasons I feel as randy (love that word) as I do right now is because I was able to keep my ovaries and so far, they seem to be working (knock on wood!). I've read where they can shut down, either temporarily or permanently, after a hyst and many sisters don't even have a choice about keeping them...their ovaries are sick and have to go. I'm sure I'll have to deal with hormonal menopause and HRT at some point in the future, but not right now.

And then there's the whole "forbidden fruit" thing... it's really true! And amazing how creative we can be when we have to!



Amoreena

Hello! I had to write to tell you that I also had some of your fears. I had not felt like being sexual with my husband since my problems(molar pregnancy) started. I had vaginal dryness and just no libido at all.
I had my surgery Jan.13 and I am thrilled to say I can't wait for the all clear
I had my cervix removed and lubrication is not a problem for me. Sorry if and all of that happens with just a kiss from dh. I have had very nice dreams and orgasm is not a problem either. Just think on the positive side. I believe we won't feel anything if we keep telling ourselves we won't. I did not hurt or anything before the surgery so I would think that those who did might feel a whole lot better. I really think it will be fine for you and I will keep you in my prayers to have a healthy healing. I also pray for you to have peace of mind. I am 2 weeks out now and I am feeling so much better. Each day I am counting down. Good Luck and best wishes. Loleta

I am feelin you girfriend! same worries but I promised myself not to put anything above my health (need to be here to raise a couple of kids). Think happy thoughts!

i had my 6 week post op yesterday........i found out (last night) that i could still get lubrication but it didnt last very long....i was really nervous.....but after reading here a few weeks ago about what to kinda expect i ordered from the hystersister store.....some help.....it wasnt messy or anything and it reallly worked for us............also it saved me from having to buy it at the store..........it came in a plain brown box so nobody gave me any funny looks.......not even the mail man

Tess