Sexual Problems are Affecting my Marriage

Hi Ladies,
It amazes me that there have been so many responses to that 2nd thread I wrote awhile back.Now there are a couple of pages and every day there seems to be another response.

I have tried to get my better half to read some of them, so that he doesn't continue to think that it's "all in my head".This morning I mentioned that I couldn't believe so many other women were feeling exactly like I am, and experiencing the same physical symptoms...
His reponse? He said that "if everyone else felt that way, then it must be okay then"....He was being extremely sarcastic and felt like I was looking for a way out of dealing with this.He also said that regardless of what I've read, he still thinks it is all in my head...
I've booked an appointment with a counsellor.I go first and then we both go as a couple.My partner thinks that I need the help and feels that I should go spill my guts prior to him going with me.

My relationship is literally falling apart and this is causing me alot of stress. I feel like I'm going to explode.Hopefully this counselling session will help.

Any one else have a husband whose losing his patience? A few months ago he even said that I shouldn't be surprised if he found someone else.We've been together almost 11 years and my surgery was just a little over a year ago.

PEBB

Hi Pebb
I'm sorry to hear you are having probs too. Yes, I have been amazed at the responses, indicating this problem is much more common than at first thought.
On Sunday, I cried most of the day. I awoke to my dh being amourous (sp) and I guess I began to half heartedly join in. All of a sudden, he stopped and got up out of bed. He said that I make him feel as if I am just "putting up" with him. Boy did that hurt. I could see how hurt he was too. These feelings are hard to deal with. I love him so dearly and miss the closeness our lovemaking used to bring. I believe that the closeness and bonding is very important to a relationship.
Its brave of you to go to counselling. I find myself really anxious about seeing my gyn again even, I take my hat off to you. Good luck, at least you are doing something about it. Hang in there. Big s to you
Sue
x

Hello Pebb
Reading your letter was like a shadow of myself and my husband of 25 years.
My op, was two years ago recovery was quite easy and I certainly felt so much better.
I have to control my weight and try my best to keep attractive for my husband. He is a good man but is beginning to get annoyed over SEX problems. I fancy the idea but nothing like we had before. I have certainly changed with regard that..

I know how you feel.I came to this web site to prove to my boyfriend that I'm not the only women going through all this.I had my surgery 3 years ago and have no sexual desire. It also causes alot of stress in my relaitionship and I am lost as to what to do to get him to understand that its not him its me.

	Quote:
Originally posted by PEBB Hi Ladies, It amazes me that there have been so many responses to that 2nd thread I wrote awhile back.Now there are a couple of pages and every day there seems to be another response. I have tried to get my better half to read some of them, so that he doesn't continue to think that it's "all in my head".This morning I mentioned that I couldn't believe so many other women were feeling exactly like I am, and experiencing the same physical symptoms... His reponse? He said that "if everyone else felt that way, then it must be okay then"....He was being extremely sarcastic and felt like I was looking for a way out of dealing with this.He also said that regardless of what I've read, he still thinks it is all in my head... I've booked an appointment with a counsellor.I go first and then we both go as a couple.My partner thinks that I need the help and feels that I should go spill my guts prior to him going with me. My relationship is literally falling apart and this is causing me alot of stress. I feel like I'm going to explode.Hopefully this counselling session will help. Any one else have a husband whose losing his patience? A few months ago he even said that I shouldn't be surprised if he found someone else.We've been together almost 11 years and my surgery was just a little over a year ago. PEBB

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