3 Hour Drive??

Dear Sisters,

I'm having quite a dilemma and need some advice!! My 13yo dd has resumed Chemo and we need to get her up there to the dr every week, which is a 3hr drive EACH way. Normally her dad (my ex-dh) is in town to take her/us(she goes w/out me on the week she just gets a physical and tests then I go too on the week she's admitted for 3 days of iv Chemo) but he's "too busy now" working, often out of state. My dr hasn't released me to drive yet, let alone a 6hr round trip!! I'm having trouble finding people nearby that can take that much time off from farming (we live in a rural farming community) to make this drive for us.

When, realistically, do you think a 6hr round trip is possible?? My TAH, 12" vertial incision was done on 6-6-05 and I'm healing well except for the soreness/tiredness & Swelly Belly. Yes, I'll check w/my dr but I also want advice from sisters who've had hysters as my dr has not had one. TIA for ANY thoughts!!!!

I don't know what type of cancer your dd has, but when my dd was being treated for Leukemia (albeit 24 years ago) the Leukemia Society was very helpful as far as helping with various matters. Have you contacted your local cancer society to see if there is any assistance? What about the Ronald McDonald house (in Louisville) could you possibly stay there (that is if you are in Louisville for treatment)? Just a couple of thoughts.

(((Heirloom)))

At this point in your recovery, some could feasibly make this trip. A lot depends on whether or not you are taking narcotic pain meds at this point and if the sedation is totally out of your system. How are your reflexes? Are you still guarding your tummy?

Maybe your doctor has ideas of possible work arounds. Is it possible for your daughter to receive this next one treatment series closer to home? Sometimes docs can pull strings for you.

Don't be afraid to ask for all the help you need! Your DD is worth it!

Thank you Ladies for your suggestions/questions, I truly appreciate them!!

There is no help from the Cancer Society w/transportation or much else for that matter. Joy has been diagnosed w/an EXTREMELY rare form of Cancer that Kosairs has never treated. Yes, we're in Louisville at Kosairs for treatment. Ronald Mc D house is nearby and an option if they have a room available when we'll be up there. We don't know until that day and sometimes not 'till evening that day whether there's a room available. I spoke w/an Oncology nurse today and she said "they might be able to sweet talk R Mc D house into making sure there's a room for us since my physical condition is only temporary and Joy needs to have her treatments as scheduled if at all possible". Today my brother came 100 miles to get her, take her to his house for the night then take her for pre-admit testing tomorrow (it's only 45 miles from his house to Louisville & he has to p/up his own dd from camp near there tomorrow morning) then will bring her home tomorrow night. I'm VERY thankful he's able to do it this time!!!! We'll see about the trip driver to get us to L'ville to start treatment on Monday.

I rode in the car for this trip on 6/27 and boy was it tough!! Riding in the car is definitely NOT on my list of fun things these days but for dd I'll do ANYTHING!!!! I'm trusting God will get us there for her treatments in a manner that will work!!!!

Yes, I'm still guarding my tummy ALL THE TIME as it's still SO tender. I've pulled a muscle on both sides of my incision which sure isn't helping the pain factor!!

My reflexes are lousy due to the tender tummy so I don't think I'm safe to drive at all let alone that distance/traffic considerations.

No, I'm not taking any narcotics and only a very rare Motrin so there's no concern there.

Unfortunately there's no other place willing to treat her 'cause she's a child! We tried this before delaying her treatment for 3 weeks immediately following my surgery. The 2 girls at home and I are SO close and Joy wouldn't go take treatment until I could go w/her!! Her dr said it would be ok to wait since she would be SO miserable if she had to go w/out me & that the Chemo probably wouldn't work well 'cause she would be so stressed.

I'm definitely going to ask for ALL the help we need to get us through this "big bump in the road"!! It's a tough thing for me to ask for help but I've been told "Asking others for help gives them an opportunity to help someone and they feel good about it". I know for myself I feel good giving help & now it's time for me to ask for help.

Thank you for listening/suggesting!! If you think of anything else PLEASE post!!

Just wondering, who is Joy's oncologist? Is it Dr. Bertolone? That was who Heather's was. I guess he's still practicing. How many more treatments does your daughter need or do you know? Have you contacted the James Graham Brown Cancer Center for suggestions?

Joy's oncologist is Dr Ahuja who works in Dr Bertolone's (Dr B as he's affectionately referred to) clinic. One of my neighbors has a 14yo boy who was treated by Dr B 10yrs ago and is a fine healthy young man. We know that God STILL HEALS and are awaiting the physical manifestation of His healing in Joy's physical body!! We've had some "go 'rounds" w/doctors who've said "miracles don't happen very often so don't count on one" to which we tell them that God DOES heal!

Joy will have treatments every 2wks indefinitely. She's REALLY frustrated 'cause most of the things she likes to do (all types of farming, gardening, creek playing, animal care, etc) are OFF LIMITS until she's at least 6mos post treatments!! She's a farm girl through and through which makes this SO tough for her!! She's been doing Ebay which has given her an outlet but it's NOT the same as being able to do the outside things she so enjoys!! I keep reminding her to count her blessings and realize that she IS blessed even w/the limitations she currently has. She's a girl with strong faith but she's still just a kid in so many ways! Her faith and LOTS of prayers are keeping her going!! Here's her website that helps people keep up on her treatments (not updated recently as I've been on this board SO much since my hyster )!! http://www.caringbridge.org/ky/farmgirljoy

I haven't contacted Brown Cancer but will talk to the social worker sometime Mon-Wed while we're up at the hospital and see what she knows for options. I know that God will work everything out and I need to try NOT to worry about transportation!! NOT WORRY is the way!!!!

Heirloom I was one wk post op when I had to drive also. Mine wasn't for anything of that magnitude. But I did drive without my Dr permission of course. But sometimes a mom has to do what a mom has to do. I am 4wks post op and do have permission on my 5th wk to take a 14 our one way trip. Then rest and come back a couple days later. Always be aware of your surroundings. I am not saying it is right to do it, but if you do try to take the route without so many turns or curves. I took a direct route and never parked where I had to back up. Took a small pillow to protect my belly form the seatbelt and took frequent rests. My hard head would not listen to others though and I too had no one to help me in this situation.

Kathleen