Why isn't sex important to Drs.

Hello,

I am 37 yrs old and in the beggining stages of my 2nd marriage. Because sex was something I dreaded in my first marriage I avoided it. But Because my new husband is a wonderfull sex partner I have just begun to realize that sex can be great. I actully want sex now and I'm just begining to explore that realm. My doc. has says I have to have a hysterectomy due to uterine prolapse (grade 2, Minor). I want to keep my cervix because other women have told me that losing their cervix destroyed their sex life. A nurse told me that the cervix helps hold the vagina in place. My doc. told me it is a package deal you can't remove one without the other. Prior to my visit I was having some pain with sex and some light cramping afterwards. Now since I have seen him the pain and cramping is there all the time. I'm very confused and scared. And I don't want to put an end to a sexual relationship that has just started to blossom. I am worried that he will feel after time that he has been ripped off. I know I will feel that way. I'm so upset I have been crying for 3 days now. If anyone has any info. that may help me I would greatly appreciate it.

Fallflower :cry:

Dear Fallflower:

So sorry to hear of the bad report from your doc. Generally speaking, prolapse would make you an excellent candidate for a less-invasive vaginal hyst, since the uterus is headed south anyway. However, vaginal hyst also requires removal of the cervix (in my own case, the cervix turned out to be the major problem!).

In order to keep the cervix, you would need to have LSH (laparascopic hyst) or SAH (sub-total abdominal hyst). You should consider keeping your ovaries if they are healthy and you have no family history of ovarian cancer. I hope you will pursue a 2nd or 3rd medical opinion. My doc #2 had much more cutting & pasting in mind for me than doc #3.

Get smart abut your symptoms and your options, and make the best choice for YOU! I am sending huge cyberhugs

Thank you for the info. My doc never disscussed anything but a vaginal hysterectomy. I want to get a second opinion but my family thinks this doc is a god. (he gave my aunt her twins) So everyone tells me to just do what he says. I'm going to call some other docs on mon. and see if I can get an appointment for a second opinion.

Definitely get second opinions. I will be having surgery in December to remove my ovaries and uterus. I sought two other opinions in addition to my gyne's before agreeing to surgery. I even saw a gyne/onc.

Hi Fallflower,

I agree with the other ladies. Get a 2nd opinion ASAP.

My 1st Dr. wanted to do a TAH and my 2nd Dr. a LSH. I got two very ~different~ opinions. I am 18 months post-op now from my LSH and I am still very pleased with my surgery results.

Here is a brief link that goes over the LSH surgery:\
http://www.laparoscopicsupracervicalhysterectomy.com/

My LSH Dr. felt the cervix helps with pelvic support and with sex. For me..true on both. You can get pros and cons on keeping ~or~ not keeping the cervix. For me, keeping my cervix was a good choice.

Getting a 2nd or 3rd opinion will only help you gather more info. so you can make a good decision for youself.

Best wishes,

Mary

Fallflower: I'm 36 and two years post abdominal hyst. I kept my ovaries but had my cervix removed. I can only speak for myself but my sex life is even better after the hyst than before. My orgasms are stronger and last much longer. Each person has to make their own decision as far as keeping the cervix or not. Also, I've read on this board that if you keep the cervix there is a chance that you will still have "mini" periods even after surgery. Who wants that! I'm just saying that the cervix is not (in my opinion) the be all end all as far as sex goes. If you're not comfortable with your doctor you should definitely get a second opinion. Take care.

Lora

Hi Fallflower,

In answer to Lora's question about a mini-period. Yes.. there is a chance of a mini-period in post op if one or both ovaries and the cervix are retained after a hyst.

I had my cervix cauterized during my hyst and I have not had a mini-period in post-op. Something maybe to ask your 2nd Dr. about.

Many cervix-retaining ladies who ~post~ after surgery who have a mini-period say it generally only requires a pantyliner at that time of the month.

Best wishes again,

Mary

Thank you all so much for the advise. It is so comforting to to be able to communicate with women on this issue. I live in a house full of men. And they are just hoping I can still cook and do laundry afterwards. LOL!

I am finally smiling again

fallflower, If your hysterectomy is for Grade 2 (Minor) prolapse and the prolapse is not bothering you--you really don't need to have the surgery. If it is bothering you than get a few opinions of having the least invasive procedure done. Most women have some degree of prolapse, it is not a reason for major surgery unless it is or has caused other problems. Your prolapse is not necessarily going to get any worse.

Your doctor is not offering you an adequate explanation for why your cervix could not be retained. Is it because of the prolapse or because he just doesn't do that kind of hysterectomy. Another opinion should clarify the issue.

Does anyone know why the uterus cannot be resuspended?

I agree with all of the above. Absolutely you should not have surgery as long as you have questions. Please do yourself a tremendous favor and seek a 2nd and even a 3rd opinion. My best to you..... I wish I knew that answer, Pearle. Maybe someone out there does. Maybe doctors just don't think it's worth the bother to suspend a uterus??????