Intimacy Question

I saw my doctor at 2 weeks post-op to have staples removed. She did an internal check then and said not healed yet (of course) and to wait 6-8 weeks post op for intercourse. Well, I'm nearing the 6 weeks and since I won't be seeing my dr. again how do I know for sure if I'm healed. I'm getting nervous after reading posts about vaginal cuff tearing, etc. Thanks for any input.

Cindy,
It amazes me that so many doctors do that. I was originally told no sex for 6 weeks, then told no for 8 weeks. Hurricane and appointment cancelation etc.........I saw my doc at 9 weeks and she didn't do a vaginal exam. She pushed around on the outside. She said we could resume intercourse and she'd see me in 4 weeks. She said, they'd check then to make sure everything was okay. What she did tell me though was this: Wait until week ten (I was on antibiotics for a UTI) to let some of the soreness from the infection subside. No rough stuff, slow and easy. Use lube if needed (we didn't) and if it hurt....stop and wait another week. Any bright red bleeding......call her....or gushing go to the local ER. That was comforting! Seriously though, we did take it very easy the first few times and I had no pain or bleeding. And everything worked! When she did check me at 13 weeks.....she said my cuff looked wonderful! No granulation and no tearing.

This is just my personal opinion but I think sometimes if we push it too fast it can lead to problems. And remember just because the doctor says you can.....you have the right to wait until your ready.

Take it easy and I pray things go well for you the first time. The best advice I was given by the sisters was try to relax and take it slow and easy. It was good advice. At 16 weeks we are pretty much back to normal.

Theresa

My personal opinion...I would wait until I have been to the dr., had another internal exam, and get the green light for sex. That's just my Some ladies are healed fairly early, others are not. There is no way to know for sure if you are healed unless your dr. examins you. I never understood how some drs. just give the green light without an exam?

Best wishes, and hope all goes well for you! Please don't rush into anything unless you are physically and mentally ready.

Jackie,

I'm not supposed to see the dr. again until 6 mos. after surgery.

Roses,
I'd make another appt. within the next 2wks. My dr (on paper, at hospital discharge) gave me the ok for sex at 4-6wks (whatever that means?), so I waited until my 5 1/2 week checkup, had an internal exam, and then got the green light.
Hope this helps...even my understanding DH would have had problems waiting 6 months LOL!!!
LL

6 months?? Roses, I would call and schedule an appt. My discharge papers said the same thing, resume normal activities (to include sex) within 6 - 8 weeks; however, I had an appt. scheduled to be examined by my dr. before resuming any of those activities.

I can not believe you would not see the dr. for 6 mo. I know all dr's are different...but, that seems like an awful long time.

Hope you can get in to see your dr. very soon.

Wow, I can't believe that some of you don't see your doctors for 6 mos. I saw mine at 2 weeks and 6 weeks. At the 6 week appointment he said I was healed enough to resume all activities, including sex, but to go slowly. My first experience so far was great, no pain or bleeding, and everything work wonderfully. I know that we all heal at different rates but I only felt comfortable having sex after the doctor said it was okay. He said some pain would be normal but if I had any bleeding to calll him and come in for an exam just to make sure everything is okay.

It is amazing to me how different instructions are from one doctor to the next.

Hi Cindy, we had our hysts the same date, however, I had LAVH. My doc saw me at 4 weeks and released me then to have sex at 6 weeks. Having read all the granulation horror stories, I asked my doc to check for it then. She said it looked good, no granulation, just to wait until week 6. My dh is fairly well-endowed, and I explained that to my doc and she did not seem to be concerned with that; however, Im scared to death I'm going to tear and have to wait another 6 weeks or something. It's very unnerving... I almost want to ask him to wait another week or two. But then again, I don't want to wait another week either!

Cindy
Some drs don't seem to think this final internal exam is necessary. If you aren't comfortable with that(I wouldn't have been either) I would just call and explain that you aren't comfortable with that and need the reassurance that everything is healed well. Hopefully they will schedule you so you can have the peace of mind.
Let us know what happens.
's, Rita

HI all and thanks for your responses. My dr. is 3 hours away. I was to have the hyst. with my reg. gyn because of excessive bleeding and painful ovarian cysts and then my CA125 doubled and because of possibility of cancer, I was scheduled with gynocologic/oncologist and there wasn't any close by. The pathology came back fine (no cancer) and I was surprised the dr. wanted to see me in 6 mos. But she wanted to take care of hrt and was completely confident I would be ok in 6-8 weeks for intercourse. Of course, I can call if I want, I just didn't know if it would be necessary.