Calling all veteran hystersisters !

Ok girls are you ready for this one? I had my surgery in june 2005 and I waited for over 6 months to have sex again. I wanted to be sure I was good and healed.Also i still had sore spots from vaginal repair.So last week I finally got the nerve to try it and it hurt to even try.We used lots of vasoline,but only got a little ways.My question is this- does it get better with time and practice like when we were virgins? Cause thats how it feels kinda.I know Im MUCH tighter.He had problems even that way.This is going to be TMI,but it felt like a banana in a coke bottle !!!!!!! Any others run into problems at first?

Sorry to hear you're having problems.

Things do get better with practice, especially once you're able to relax more. If not, you'll want to run it past your surgeon.

I noted you are using Vaseline as a lubricant........not the best. Water soluble lubricants are much kinder to your body. You can find them at just about any store these days, with more variety at drugstores.

Take care.........................Deb

I agree with Fibroid Woman. Vaseline is not the best. Try KY or Astroglide. There are lots and lots of 'personal lubricants' out there that are made for that specific purpose.

I think my area down there tends to shrink when not in use too.

hey i stumbled across this post - so i wanted to say thank you!

i'm a little nervous about when hubby & i do resume sex, in fact, he's currently overseas, and today while i was doing the shopping i found myself standing in the area in the supermarket where the condoms & lubricant are. i figured the water soluable ones were best, and next time i think i'll have the courage to actually BUY some - i felt like a 16 year old kid today LOL oh well!

bkteller, i can only assume that some patience and gentle care will get you through this one - oh and definitely switch to a water-based lubricant. vaseline is made from nasty stuff! the fact you've waited 6 months is amazing - so i do hope everything is nicely repaired now, and perhaps your body just needs a gentle reminder about how to go about it all... don't mean to sound crass, (and i hope this doesn't get me blasted from the site!) but perhaps some mutual masturbation may aid you and your partner in your endeavours.

all the best!
kaz x

Dear bkteller,
I also had my TVH in June(6/28/05). I have not been able to resume sex due to continued spotting. However, during my last transvaginal ultrasound (internal) I had alot of tightness and I felt stretched out afterwards. Unfortunately, bleeding came along with it. I just wanted to reassure you that the feelings are normal. You might want to mention it to your doctor, but I mentioned it and it was not a big concern. He said it would be tighter from lack of usage. So use a good lube, like ky and take it slow. It will get better. It takes time and patience. Best of luck. Tami S. in Florida

I had my TVH with A&P repair on July 28th. Due to some minor complications we had to wait 14 weeks to resume relations. It was scary and it hurt so much that we had to stop. We waited a month longer and tried again. Hurt again and stopped. We are using plenty of lubricant (Astroglide). The stuff is awesome. Now it doesn't hurt me anymore and it's getting better every time.

Take it slow, use plenty of water based lubricant. It may take a little while to get stretched out again, so don't wait so long between tries. Good luck!

Do you think you might have vaginismus, an involuntary tightening of the vagina that makes penetration of any kind painful and difficult, if not impossible....which may be physiological due to thinking it is going to hurt to have sex. With vaginismus, your apprehensions physically stop you from having sex, and sometimes after surgery like this we hear that sex can be painful and are afraid of pain so we tighten up. I think you really need to relax. Maybe your partner and you can sip alittle wine, have some quiet music playing, and just focus on each other face to face perhaps in a sitting position with your legs over his. Just try and relax and let him touch you and you touch him with your hands, etc. Perhaps with some foreplay you can relax enough to try again, perhaps you in control so you can adjust and take a easy knowing if it hurts to stop etc. Use a good lube such as astroglide, KY Jelly etc....but no vasoline! If the issue persist you need to contact your Dr.

I agree with the other sisters...water based seems to be the best... KY and Astroglide are very good products. I prefer Astroglide, personnally.

Take things slowly, and if you continue to have pain, I would consult my dr.

Best wishes to you.

Thanks guys I feel so much better.You all always come through for me.We actually made wonderful passionate love,but no actual sex if you know what I mean.(thank God for oral sex)So I was relaxed and ready,but still scared. Last night we were going to try again but he got caught up in things and the sex act itself never happened! Guess ill try again soon.I think he was afraid of hurting me again.I'll try to get ahold of some astroglide.Can you get it at Walmart? Why is water soluable better? I would think it would break down and become less effective faster,which is why I chose vasoline.Iwaited so long,mainly because I was so afraid.I still have some achyness up high as I am a real slow healer.And that fueled my fear.Most people when they have gallbladder surgery are good to go after about 2-3 weeks.It took me 6 months ! I am just now able to shop without a lot of pain .I still have a lot of tugging where the bladder sling was hung.So, you can see why I was apprehensive.Thanks again for your help,girls.Any encouragement will help.

Sweetie,
Just take it slow and easy. I got some Astroglide at the grocery store. Drugstores should have it too and so should Walmart. Try to relax... that is the best advice I can give you. Just keep trying and dont give up... OK?

We are here for you Sweetie!

Love,
Anna