letter to GYN

Last week I posted that my doctor said I was ready to go back to work at 4 weeks. I am not ready and he did not listen to my concerns. I have decided to see my PCP about my concerns and I am taking FLMA for an extra two weeks for recovery and I have full support of my employer. I thought I would share with you this letter I wrote to my GYN to see what you think before I mail it to him and the review board at the clinic he belongs to. Any comments would be appreciated!

Dear Dr. ________:
Last week, 4/26/01, when I met with you for my 4-week post op appointment after my Total Abdominal Hysterectomy, I had some questions about my recovery and that I tried to relate to you. I was having some difficulty speaking up because I was taken aback by your lack of concern of how I was feeling.

During your pelvic exam, your chatter with your nurse about her day off and your tree trimming made me feel like I was an unimportant. You said that everything looked great and I was ready to return to work. I said, I didn't feel like I was ready to work and was unable to sleep, was terribly emotional, and I felt I needed a couple more weeks before I was ready for work. You did not discuss it with me; it was just a quick "no" response. You went on to talk about what you found during the surgery and discussed the "Sleep Apnea" problem. By the time I left your office I was trying to control my tears and I was angry with myself that I was not more persistent in getting my questions answered.

After I returned home, I decided to call your nurse, and see if I could relate to her how I was feeling to see if she could talk to you. She called me back that evening, about 6:00 pm to say that you thought there was no medical reason for me to stay away from work any longer.

I wanted you to know that I am not a lazy person. I am in control of my body and I know what I can physically and mentally do. I have some concerns about how I am doing physically and emotionally; I do know that some of it may be a normal process of healing. I was looking for a physician to convince me of that. However, when I left your office it was obvious that your only concern was with the surgery site. I am consulting with my PCP about my other questions that you did not concern yourself with.

I suggest that someday you place yourself on that exam table and place your legs in the stirrups so you know how vulnerable it feels. I believe you are a good surgeon, however you lack compassion for your patients.

Good for you!!!! Sometimes we all need a wake up call. I think you letter should very well give him that. I hope that he responds to you with a letter of apology, which you do deserve.. Take care..

Hurray!! I also had trouble with my Dr. about my problems and feelings, and I HAD female Dr. I changed Drs. at 5 weeks post op. She released me at 3 weeks cut off my pain meds. and didn't seem a bit concerned about the pain in my left side. I've since found out with my new Dr. (male) that I have some scarring and possible adhesions. Put me on a few more pain meds. for when I need them (I'm at ten weeks post op) and will keep an eye on things. I think it's a good idea to write a letter to the Dr. I might just do that too.