Scared and Confused

Hello sisters! I go for my pre-op appt in a few days and now I'm confused. I dont know if I made the right decision. I've had 3 myometomies in 7 years for fibroids. (by the way I'm 31) They just keep coming back. I want to evict them once and for all. I asked for a hysterectomy. Now that I found a doctor that i like and will do it I'm scared. I don't understand my confusion. Also I'm having fears that I won't make it through the surgery. I havent worried in the past about surgery so why now? Is this normal? Does any one have any tips that might help me get through this? I just want to have my life back.

You sound like me. I have fibroids. Last Oct, I didn't. From Feb to May it grew from feeling (in the morning I could feel it through my skin) like a golf ball to being able to just barely cover it with a cupped hand.

I contemplated a mymomectomy. I had even pretty much 'decided on it' as my husband and mom were really opposed to a Hyst. But then I saw the US. It sits along the top of my uterus. I was told external Fibroids were normally on stems (so in my mind, 1 blood supply line, easy removal) but mine isn't. Its sharing vasular stuff all the way across. I juts couldn't get my arms around that and feared it would have a significant risk of blood loss (my Dr said they wouldn't really know until they go in there but her feeling was that yes there were be a good possibility they would have to open me up and proceed with an abdominal removal of my uterus). The US also showed another Fibroid at 17 mm (Dr said she might have missed it 6 weeks earlier but not at that size so it too was growing).

So I decided to get this over with in 1 surgery and actually once I decided, everyone has been pretty much behind me.

But to your point, once I decided, I was 'right' for the next 3 weeks. Things have been ok since then but I was a mess for a bit, even though this was what I wanted.

Everyone will tell you the waiting is the worst part. And having talked to someone who had to Myo's prior to her Hyst, she said her second Myo was the worst surgery of all 3.

Julie

You have to let me know how it goes with your surgery. I pray everything goes ok. Its makes me fill better to know that there are sisters who are going through the same thing and have made it through just fine. By the way my third mymo was the worts.

I am not stressed about this surgery, but I have posted before that the day before my lap surgery in April, I was terrified! I even updated my will. I don't think I was afraid of the procedure, just what they would find in there.

Whatever you are feeling - good, bad, both - it is normal and okay. If you read through this forum, you will find many others who have had similar fears and confusion.

Like you, I am eager to get this behind me and get my life back. Maybe it is because I know so many women who rave about how much their life improved after, that I am confident that this is the right decision for me. I know that I just cannot deal with the constant pain, gushing, clots, embarrassing situations, and inability to do things I love any longer. I know some women struggle emotionally with losing their uterus, but I just look at it as something that is giving me grief. If my appendix was bothering me, I'd have it out in a heartbeat, so to me, this is no different. Not everyone feels that way, and I can understand those who feel differently. I think each of us comes to terms with it in our own way and in our own time.

If you know this is the right decision, move forward. if you have doubts, wait until you are ready. This is not a decision that should be made lightly and IMO, recovery will be much easier if you are comfortable going in.

Whichever way you go, I hope your anxiety lessens and you feel better soon!